About a year and a half ago, I laid my eyes on one of the most attractive guys I have ever seen in my life. I needed to get to know him, so I went in and added him on Snapchat and made the first move by talking to him first. Long story short, I ended up liking him and he ended up liking me, so we became boyfriend and girlfriend... and now, we've been dating for a whole 3,153,600 seconds!
Every relationship comes with its ups and downs but somehow, my boyfriend and I made it through those and became stronger as a couple. I have learned so much; I was in a mentally abusive relationship before I met my current boyfriend. Luckily enough, he taught me to love myself and love someone else romantically again. I really can't thank him enough for some things, but I really have taken a new perspective on love. Here are some lessons I learned throughout this year of being together.
1. Love yourself first
In order to love somebody else, you need to love yourself first. I was in a rut for quite some time where I didn't really care for myself anymore. If I didn't have love for myself, how could I give love to someone else? Once I gained it back, I finally felt like I could love another human being again, which I did.
2. Try things your partner likes, even if you think you'll hate it
My boyfriend is a HUGE movie geek. I've never met anyone else who loves movies as much as him. I never really watched movies a lot until I met him and one of his favorite series is the Marvel movies. I never thought I'd be into those movies just because they're not my type, until I finally gave in and watched some with him. Turns out I was wrong and now the series is one of my favorites too.
3. Insecurity can ruin everything
Being insecure sucks. I'm sure anyone else who has insecurities would agree. You have to have your partner reassure you that they still like you (even though they're dating you). Over time, it can hurt you and your partner, but with time as well, it gets better.
4. You don't need to be talking 24/7
My boyfriend is a pre-dental/bio major, is in track and is always the library studying or participating in SI. He's a very busy boy. Sometimes he's so busy that he doesn't text me back for hours on end. I work three jobs too. Sometimes we just can't get to the phone.
5. Long distance sucks... even though it's not really long distance
Back home, my boyfriend and I live about 20 minutes away from each other. When we're both at college, we're an hour away from each other. It's really not long distance since it's only an hour away, but when I'm feeling down or need help with something, I can't just drive over for the day.
6. Be their biggest supporter
Being supportive is one the biggest things to do in a relationship. If my boyfriend has a bad day with track or didn't do as good as he thought he did on an exam, I'm there. He does the same thing for me.
7. Love changes over time
Obviously when you're together for a long time, things will die down. A year ago last year, my BF and I were sending such lovey dovey messages and making sure that the flirting was still going strong. Now, I'm lucky if I even get a thorough goodnight text, and that's okay because things will change over time.
They don't have to be everyday or every week. It's just a little gesture to know that everything is still going good. One time I bought my boyfriend a movie and planned a night in. Sometimes he'll randomly take me out to eat at a nice restaurant. It's things like that that go a long ways.
9. Everyone shows their love in different ways
My boyfriend is not the type of guy to go out and buy me flowers or chocolates. He's the type of guy that will make fun of me and then cuddle me five minutes later... and that's how he shows his love for me. That's what makes him, him. And I love it (even though sometimes we make fun of each other like brother and sister).
10. Relationships in college are hard
I'll be honest, dating while in college really takes a toll on you. I'm either working, doing homework, or running errands. My boyfriend is either at practice, doing homework, working out or in the library. Sometimes it gets frustrating because you can't talk to them as much, especially if you go to different schools.
11. Try to show appreciation every day
The smallest bit of appreciation can make or break a day. We always make sure to show that we appreciate each other in some type of way almost every day. It really can make my day ten times better when I know I'm appreciated.
12. Your partner will become your best friend
This is the best thing that can happen in a relationship in my opinion. My boyfriend really is my best friend. I know I can trust him with anything I tell him, I can always go to him about a problem and I know I can always count on him to have my back.
Thank you for making these past 12 months unforgettable. Here's to many more, happy 1 year anniversary, Adam. I love you more than anything!