Dating today is tricky. Like I have mentioned in my previous article, dating is a headache. There is a lack of honesty, communication, mind games, and even social media and technology that gets in the way. From personal experience and hearing stories from others, here are 12 signs that he/she who you are "seeing" or want to try and get to know is not into you (I will be using "they/them/their...etc." to refer to males and females in this article).
1. You are always the one contacting them; they never contact you first
If you have to be the one to constantly reach out to them, just stop trying. They really do not care.
2. Their answers in text are extremely short and broad
Some people really are bad texters, but if their common replies are "K," "Chllin," or "Sup," do not even bother talking to them. They will make an effort to full-on text you if they are interested.
3. They only talk to you at 1 AM to hangout
Listen, sometimes people do like to hang out late, which is totally fine. I hung out with a guy until 1 AM once after he took a ride to Target with me. But if they are only contacting you after midnight to hang out in their car cause they are bored, it's probably because they want to have sex with you. They do not actually care.
4. They only talk to you when they are bored
Ahh yes. The typical, "Hey, I'm bored" text. They are probably honestly using you cause they are obviously bored. They do not care.
5. They have not asked you on an actual date after hanging out with them for a while
If you are constantly hanging out and getting to know each other, but you have not been on an official date yet, just run away. They are not serious.
6. They do not take the time to respond to you
Trust me, there have been times where I do not look at my phone for hours. But if they cannot at least give you a heads up that they are busy and they answer you ten days later, that is a bad sign.
7. They are seeing other people besides you
If they still want to date around after you have been talking to them for a while, that is a red flag. Do not wait around for someone who is not sure what they want. Speaking of that....
8. They do not know what they want
Dating is confusing, no doubt. I do admit, I have had conflicting issues before on whether or not I liked someone but I do my best to figure out my emotions so I do not lead the guy on. However, I dated a guy once and one day he said he liked me. Then another day he said that he did not want a relationship. Then a few days later he told me he wanted to be my boyfriend but was not sure. So I did what I thought was proper and stopped seeing him. Him being confused about me was hurting my head. If they do not know what they want, get rid of them.
9. They ghosted you
Ghosting is when someone completely erases you from all aspects of their life. They block off all communication in person, technology, and on social media without a warning. So if they ghost you, you probably do not want to try and get in contact with them (and usually you can't anyway). It is a pretty immature thing for people to do but it is our world today, unfortunately.
10. They are just talking to you in the meantime until they find what they actually want
So I have a friend who liked a girl. He kept telling me though that she would talk to him through text all the time but would not say yes to a date with him and this happened every time he asked. He said she would be flirty and be friendly over text, but would make excuses not to meet up with him. Basically I told him that she is only talking to him until she finds someone better as she just needed someone to talk to since she just broke up with her boyfriend. Essentially, my friend was someone she just spoke to as a way to feel better. Of course, it is okay to need comfort, but talk to a family member or friend and do not lead someone on like that. Anywho, she got back with her ex (shocker) and stopped talking to my friend. So, be careful of signs of when talking to a person. They may be talking to you for the wrong reasons. I hope my friend learned his lesson.
11. They keep you waiting
I am sure everyone has waited all day for someone that they like to text them, call them, ask them out after hanging for a while, etc. If you have to wait at least three days to hear back from someone, please do not wait. If they do not care to keep you in the loop, they have better things in their lives I assume and are uninterested. Trust me, if they want to talk to you, they will make an effort.
12. You sit and wonder why you are even talking to them
If you have to sit and wonder if they like you, stop talking to them (I wish I took my own advice). But seriously, like I said before, if they like you, they will make an effort to talk to you.
Well, I am sorry that dating in today's world sucks. But hey, that's the game of love, unfortunately. Love really is a battlefield.