I have been dating my boyfriend for a little over 2.5 years and it has been the best 2.5 years of my life! However, it wasn't until recently that he was my boyfriend. He came out as trans a few months ago and I could not be more proud of him! We have been through a lot together but I am so happy I get to be by his side during his transition and support him in any way that I can. Even though it has only been a few months, dating a trans person is very different than dating a cis person. Different in a bad way? Of course not!!! But there are some added barriers. There are also millions of amazing things that happen when your partner is trans that not a lot of people know about...some might even say that they are cons, but I am here to show you why they are actually pros! Here are the top 5:
1. Your partner gets more attractive with each passing day
Whether they have had surgeries, are on hormones, or are just becoming the person they truly are, it's almost as if they get hotter each time you see them.
2. You really learn what empathy means
I have heard the word empathy throughout my entire life. I thought I knew what it meant but I really didn't until my boyfriend came out as trans. Gender identity and gender dysphoria are issues that not many people go through or understand, but they are some of the most intense and heartbreaking. I have learned of so many daily problems that I have the privilege of not worrying about that people in the trans community have to deal with multiple times a day. Although I can't fully understand what my boyfriend and other trans people are going through, I have learned to try my hardest to acknowledge my cis privilege, understand what trans people are dealing with, and protect my boyfriend from what I can.
3. They become more and more confident
I cannot even imagine having a body that doesn't match my heart and mind. But one thing I've found is that during the transition process, my boyfriend's confidence and joy has pretty much doubled-and it has only been a few months. But this is the good kind of confidence. It's not self-centered or egotistical. It is beautiful. Sometimes I'll walk into the bathroom and I'll see my boyfriend just staring at himself in the mirror smiling. He's finally finding the confidence that he hasn't had his entire life.
4. People ask you very inappropriate questions about your relationship
Is this annoying or uncalled for? Yes. Is there an upside? Also yes! When myself or my partner are asked these questions, we use that as an educational moment for that person. Trans ignorance and LGBTQ+ ignorance, in general, is very common but the more we can educate people, the better!
5. You kind of have to fall in love over and over again
Your partner is continuously changing throughout their transition. You learn new things about their personality every day because each day they are closer to being the person they truly are. I find this to be extremely beautiful and probably one of my favorite things about having a transgender boyfriend.