What is it that is so tempting about social media? What is the allure of being able to obtain almost every facet of someone else’s life the moment it happens?—Questions we don’t always ask ourselves but many of us love the power and ability to “creep” on the lives of others, like: our friends, family, significant others and even exes.
Developing new relationships has never been so easy, especially in this age of the friend request, the follow, and the “@”. If you do not believe that we can now develop connections with ease take a visit to your Facebook and explore your suggested friends list. The access that you have to others- many whom you have never met- through “mutual friends” is uncanny. It’s a virtual rolodex that is at the tips of your fingers.
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The ability to know what your friends are doing at virtually any time of the day can be beneficial in more ways than one. The unfortunate reality is that because we keep our lives so public more than just our friends and loved ones can see what we’re up to. Did you block your ex?
Going through a breakup is hard enough and now because of social media many of us—including myself-- have fallen into toxic relationships that we keep falling back into. Why is it so hard to move on?
The sad reality is that, most of the time, if the relationship keeps ending badly and they are still friends with you on all of social media, you are keeping them around because you like to “creep”.
You may be approaching creep status if...
1. Are no longer together but at least once in the day check their Twitter, Snapchat, Facebook, and/or Instagram to see if they have “moved on."
2. Have no intention of getting back together with your ex but find personal satisfaction in seeing they are not happy without you.
3. Have every intention of getting back together with your ex and take advantage of them still following you by using every opportunity you can to prove how much better you are without them.
4. Look at their posts more times than you brush your teeth
5. Use their post’s location settings to “accidentally” bump into them at the coffee shop they visit every day at 11 a.m. whilst wearing an outfit you bought just for said meeting.
If you have done anything-- or everything-- on this list, we need to have a conversation about the benefits of distance. This may be a shocker but there are about five solid reasons to just move on and block your ex—ON EVERYTHING.
1. You are awesome
As cliché as it sounds, you are awesome which means that if you two broke up they didn’t appreciate how awesome you are. No seriously just tell yourself that you are awesome and you can do better. There are so many clichés in this giant sea of clichés I can throw your way, like something about fish.
2. They can creep on you too
Now, I don’t think you thought that one through did you? If you did in fact think that through and are okay with it then refer to the list above this list. Something about the concept of someone I’m no longer with watching my every move makes me uneasy. If it doesn’t make you uncomfortable then think about it with an empathetic mindset. Them seeing you happy or potentially with someone else is how a lot of slasher horror movies started in 2015.
3. Ripping off the Band-Aid hurts less
The rhetoric can get cliché at times—remember the sea and the fish?—but this is one concept that will always prove to be true. Completely cutting all ties that you have to them can be the best thing you can do. Doing this can give you time to heal without reopening wounds of what life could have been if you two stayed together. Let it be noted, who thought seeing your ex’s face every day on your timeline was a good idea anyway.
4. No more temptation
Hmm… we’ve all had this thought. “Let me like their picture, hehe, maybe now they’ll go look through my page and see how amazing my selfies are!" Okay, it may not be that exact dialogue but come on, the temptation to interact with them is sometimes unbearable. Just hit the block button and look how much free time you’ll suddenly develop.
5. Just do it
Nike had it right all along. You don’t need to create reasons to push yourself to be happy without them. There are times where keeping them around can be beneficial and you can be great friends with exes but if you think you are keeping them around for the wrong reasons it’s perfectly okay to just let go.
