10 Things You Must Consider Before You Date Someone In The Military

10 Things You Must Consider Before You Date Someone In The Military

Starting a relationship with someone in the military is scary, but definitely worth it.

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Entering into a relationship with a man (or woman) in the military can be difficult especially if you are not the woman (or man) to put forth the work and time it will need in order for the relationship to work.

1. Can You Handle The Long Distance?

Long distance relationships can be tricky but being involved with a man in the military can be even trickier. Distance can be extremely tough on a person. As humans, we crave physical contact and we crave personal interactions with the individual in which we are seeing. Having this distance between the two of you can cause conflicts and issues, however, you have to look at the distance between you as a good thing. Distance can make your love or affection and the relationship you share grow even stronger.

2. Are You Committed To One Another?

Commitment plays a humongous role in maintaining a relationship with someone in the military. Being committed to someone over a long distance requires faith, trust, and patience. Commitment is being honest and loyal to that person no matter what happens. Whether there are bad times that arise you need to forgive them and not throw in the towel when things begin to get too hard.

Working through situations and problems together will bring you so much closer. We need to hold on to the people that we commit to and not give up on them and the relationship we share. Being in a long-distance relationship and dating a man in the military there are so many problems or bad days that can occur but if you are committed to him and what you two share then you can get through any of the tough times that come your way. You will get so much joy and happiness out of it in the end!

3. Do You Have Trust In Him?

Trust is extremely important. If you do not have trust in him then you do not have trust in the relationship. When he is in another state or he is countries away, you need to trust that he only has eyes for you alone and that he will be faithful to the love and relationship in which you have together. Trust in him to not give up even through the tough times and to always fight for the relationship you guys built just like he fights for our beloved country!

4. Are You Too Busy In Your Own Personal Life To Have Time For A Relationship?

Being in college or having a demanding job can overpower us and make individuals not only stressed but also super busy. Going to college and getting a higher education takes a lot of time commitment and work to fulfill the classes you need in order to get your degree. No matter if you are in college or have a hectic busy job, you need to find the time and make sure you do not put your relationship with your loved one on the back burner. Relationships take work and time commitment to maintain a healthy and loving relationship between the two of you.

If you are personally too busy to make that time for him and put in the effort you need to make the relationship work, then, in the end, it will crumble. Being in a military type relationship there will be many times in which you are both so busy that you might go days, weeks, months etc. without seeing each other and sometimes even getting the chance to talk to one another. That is where the loyalty, trust, love, and commitment to that person comes into play!

5. Do You Have Trust In Yourself?

Trusting him is one thing but having trust in yourself and the role that you play in the relationship is equally important as well.

If you do not have trust in yourself that you will stay faithful, loyal, committed etc. to him then your trust in him and the relationship will never happen. Trust in yourself to give the relationship your best shot and to always try your best within it.

6. Are You On The Same Page As Each Other?

When it comes to any relationship you need to make sure that you two are on the same page. You need to find time to discuss with one another where you are wanting the relationship to potentially lead etc. Let each other know where your boundaries are and personal believes within a relationship. Being on the same page about life and the journey you want to take and face together is extremely important and a huge aspect of having a long-lasting relationship together.

7. Is There A Time Difference? 

Being hours behind or ahead of one another can be tricky. Planning your days to where you have time set aside for the two of you is important. A time difference can cause complications when it comes to communicating together and when it comes to seeing each other. Remember to communicate with your partner and understand that time changes can be tricky at times but if you find a routine that works for you, stick with it and do not let it be a reason that conflicts arise within your relationship with him.

8. Are You Good At Planning? 

In order to maintain a healthy and lasting relationship you need to be able to plan accordingly with one another's schedules, time changes, distance etc. Having a plan will let you grow closer together and build a stronger foundation because drawing up a plan and then performing it showcases that you are giving this relationship your all and you are willing to make it work at whatever cost!

9. Conviction? 

Conviction or belief and assurance. No matter what branch of the military you go into you is making the selfless decision to fight for your country, keep it safe, and potentially risk your life for the sake of saving others. That to me shows that going into a relationship with him, no matter how hard it gets he will always fight for it and give me and our relationship his all!

10. Are You In This For The Long Haul?

When it comes to entering into a new relationship at this time in your life, looking for a simple boyfriend to pass the time is not what I am looking for. I am looking for a meaningful and hopefully lasting connection with a man that could possibly one day be my husband and go through the journeys of life with me. With a military relationship, you put in so much time, energy, commitment, trust etc. that it builds such a strong and lasting connection and bond between the two of you that you would not ever want to end.

Yes, having a man in the military is amazing and wonderful, but make sure that is not the only reason you are pursuing him. It is not the military that makes him the man I want to be with, but the man within him and his personality and love for life is! The way he acts goofy on facetime or when we talk about our love of our father, Jesus Christ. Him being in the Coast Guard is only a job I see. The fact that he decides to put his life on the line for others and protect our country with no hesitation or concern about himself is what makes him the man I want to be with! That is what makes him a wonderful man to have within our military!

Consider these questions if you are thinking about dating someone who either is already in the military or wants to be in the military. These relationships are so special but take a lot of work and dedication.

The reward of having him at the end of the day is better than any struggles you might face along the way!

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

10 Things My Significant Other MUST Do In Order To Earn The Privilege Of Meeting My Mom

I say "Hakuna Matata" on the daily, but you really need to say it when you prepare to meet my mom.

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Besides getting married, meeting the parents can be the most stressful time in any relationship. Your boyfriend could be freaking out because he doesn't want to sound like a loon in front of your dad or your mom may be chopping the vegetables a little too loudly making your girlfriend seem uncomfortable in the presence of a knife. Stressing for days (maybe even weeks) up until the day arrives is apart of being in love because you want your parents to love your significant other just as much as you do and when the dinner is finally over, you can breathe again. My family is a little different and my boyfriend has to do these things to be able to meet my mom and my brother (may as well add my cousins into the mix, too because they're my older siblings).

1. Pass the "Best Friends Test"

I have 6 best friends and each one of them has a unique personality. There's the momma friend, the crazy friend, the questionable friend, the laid back friend, the turnt friend, and the friend who just wants me to be happy. If they don't like you, I'll talk to them to figure out why they don't like you. Either way, if you hurt me, they'll hurt you.

2. Prove that stability is your main priority five years from now, even if I'm not in your plan

Things happen and we can't predict everything. We can be together now, break up in a year, and then get back together. It's part of being a teenager/young adult. We deal with a lot, I mean, we're in college, but the older we get, the more stressful life gets, so I want you to show me that you can handle whatever stresses come your way. I want you to be stable on your own before adding a girlfriend into the mix.

3. Deal with my "Hunger Fits"

Let's face it, I can be a brat, but I'm only a brat on three occasions.

1. I'm sleepy.

2. You didn't let me get my way.

3. I'm hungry.

If you eat without me or go get food without me, I might cry and pout like a two-year-old, so you have to be able to handle it. Pro-tip, have snacks with you whenever we go somewhere.

4. Be okay with getting roasted

My cousins are the funniest people you'll ever meet, but they aren't afraid to talk about you while you sit in front of them, so I need to know that you're okay with being roasted. They're not doing it to be mean (trust me, they aren't), but they're doing it because they're my family and they care about me as if I were their little sister.

5. Be able to hold an intelligent conversation for more than 5 minutes

Good conversation is an essential part of a relationship and I love talking about things that are happening in the world today and because my mom is super knowledgeable on a lot of things, you have to be able to talk for more than 5 minutes about something that's engaging.

6. Remain calm in the face of a difficult conversation

I know when it came to certain topics, I used to go off like a volcano, but I've had to grow out of exploding on people just because they don't agree with me. It takes months, maybe even years to master that type of patience and self-restraint, but I grew up fast, so I needed to learn in less than a year how to hold my tongue. I need to know that if you and I (or someone in my family) were to be in a serious conversation, you'd remain calm. I won't blow up on you, so please don't blow up on me (or my family) because then it might not end so well.

7. State your opinion, no matter how mad I might get

Following up with number six, this is a must! I'm a writer, so I deal with a lot of written opinions on the daily. I'm also involved in a lot of organizations where open dialogue is encouraged, so I deal with a lot of verbal opinions, too. People are going to say what they want to say no matter what and I want you to be able to tell me what's on your mind no matter how severe it may be. I'm here for you and I want you to know that you can trust me with your opinions. I might not agree with them, but I can deal with them.

8. Be able to sit and talk about sports and video games with my brother

You'll for sure meet my older brother before you meet my mom only because he acts just like my late grandfather; calm and laid back. He goes with the flow and doesn't get upset unless I get upset, so you don't have to worry about the big bad overprotective brother (but he is very big and very overprotective). He'd much rather sit and talk about "fork-knife" or a basketball game than grill you. It's just how he is. Also, don't be offended if he engages in conversation with you for like ten minutes before he loses interest in talking to you and goes back to playing his game.

9. Be okay and open to the possibility of a long distance relationship

I don't plan on staying down South for long. I actually won't stay here after I graduate from college. Long distance relationships don't work for 40% of all couples, but I want us to not be a statistic. I believe that we could make it, so I would need to know that you'd be okay with me being a thousand miles away; and of course, if you were halfway across the country, I would learn to be okay with it, too.

10. Love your family as much as you love me

Family is a big deal for me. It's always been me, my older brother, and my mom. You may come from a household where it's you and both of your parents, you and one parent, or you, your parent(s), and your siblings. I love my mom and brother with all of my heart and would drop anything (and I have dropped things) to be with them. I want to see that you love your family with the same amount of love that you give me. A man who loves the family he is born into will love the family he marries into.

My family's triangle has never been broken before, so this is new territory for all of us. Don't feel like an outsider, though! These may seem extensive and extra, but it's the things that matter to me. Aside from the apparent trustworthiness, loyalty, wanting three pets, having a sense of humor, and education that I look for in a guy, you have to do these ten things to meet my mom.

If you pass all of these, then you get to meet her. Don't stress about it though because if she doesn't like you at the first meeting, she'll come around by the next because she loves me and she'll see that I love you.

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To The Parents Who Raised The Man Of My Dreams, It Paid Off

You did a phenomenal job.

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As a parent, you always wonder if you're doing it right. Parenting doesn't come with instructions. You're not told how to punish your children in every situation or what to do whenever they accomplish something. You're not completely prepared for it. However, for someone without instructions, you did a phenomenal job.

You raised the man of my dreams.

I've dated throughout my teens and every guy seemed to be the same, but with your son everything was different. Your son is everything I've ever wanted. He is perfect. He is such a gentleman. I want you to know everything you taught him like holding the door and paying for dates, it worked.

I want you to know he doesn't show anger towards me. I'm sure I aggravate him and make him angry, but I want you to know I'll never know when I've done so because he doesn't show it. He gets mad with football games and after he gets done yelling, he apologizes.

He makes me feel beautiful. He has seen me at my absolute worse. He has seen me right when I wake up in the morning with no makeup and my hair is a mess and he tells me I'm beautiful. Whenever so get dressed up, he notices. He makes sure to let me know I look beautiful. He pays attention to detail like that my hair is curled or I have a new nose ring in and he adds them in with the compliments.

He is always supportive. Whenever I started back to school, he was so proud of me. When I started writing for The Odyssey, he shared my articles. He will tell me how proud he is of me. When I make good grades on assignments, he tells me good job.

He is so loving. He comforts me whenever I'm sick. When I had the stomach bug, he got my medicine, trashcans, and played with my hair to comfort me. He brushes and straightens my hair for me whenever I don't feel like it because he wants it to look good.

Thanks to you I have found someone who treats me wonderful. If it wasn't for you, he wouldn't know how to treat a lady. It is because of you that he turned out to be nice and respectful man he is today. I want you to know you did an amazing job raising him. He's everything I've ever wanted. Thank you for raising him to be such a gentleman. Thank you for raising him to be everything I've ever dreamed of.

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