So you meet someone. You like them. They like you. You start talking/dating, but your friends are kind of iffy about the relationship. They tell you about their doubts, but of course, you don't listen. So you date them. You have fun for awhile, life is great. Until one day. One day, something changes and the relationship comes to an end. And your friends hit you with that "I told you so."
We've all been there. We've all dated someone, or taken someone back, even though our family and friends disagreed, but telling me "I told you so?"
You're supposed to be making me feel better. Not making me feel like it's all my fault.
After a breakup, all we need is support. We can talk crap about the relationship in a month when I don't care anymore. The least helpful thing to say though is "I told you so."
Breakups are hard. It has you feeling down on yourself. Sometimes, you question what you may have done wrong. You feel like you could have somehow saved it if you had done something different. And then someone comes along and says they tried to tell you the whole time. It just makes the whole situation worse. It makes you feel worse.
In three, four, five months from now, tell me I made a dumb decision.
Tell me you tried to tell me.
Because at that point, I won't care about that relationship anymore.
I'll be moved on and I'll totally agree that it was a huge mistake, but when it's just happened, I just need some support.
Instead, tell me that I'm better than that. Tell me I deserve better. Tell me better things are coming my way. Don't tell me "I told you so."
That's not how to be a good, supportive friend.