Nearly Half Of All College Students Say They'd Be Embarrassed To Meet Their Partner On A Dating App

In 2018, it's not uncommon to hear that a friend went on a date with someone from Bumble, or see YouTube Tinder horror story videos all over the internet (yes, I'm talking about you, Gabbie Hanna). Clearly, the world now is different than what our parents and grandparents experienced. Whenever I ask older people about how they met their husband/wife, they always go into elaborate detail about meeting them through a family member, at the park, etc. With consistency like that, it's hard not to wonder if online dating is ruining romance for us. So I surveyed 21 people about their opinions on the matter.

First off, I asked these 21 people if they had ever used/were currently using online dating. Of those surveyed, 18 participants admitted to using online dating at one time or another, and three said that they had never used it before. Among the online daters, the most used app was Tinder, with Bumble following closely behind.

I then asked these same people if they would be embarrassed to tell people that they met their significant other online. Surprisingly, the group was practically split in half, with 10 saying they would be embarrassed, and 11 saying that they wouldn't be. I found that result ironic because, believe it or not, 12 of the 21 people surveyed asked to be kept anonymous. And of those 12, six claimed that they wouldn't be embarrassed to admit that they met their S.O. online. If that were the case, then why keep your name private? I would argue that's contradictory.

It seems as though people might be more embarrassed than they like to admit.

The last question that I asked everyone was: Do you think online dating is making our generation's love stories less romantic? This was when people started giving lengthier responses. There were lots of different opinions. For the most part, it seems as though our generation is open to online dating and finding a lifetime partner that way, but there's still a stigma that we can't completely shake off. Check out the highlights below.

1. "Online dating just makes it easier to meet another person"

"I don't think it's less romantic. My friend met his current S.O. over an online video game, and now they're very close with each other. They still participate in behavior that would be considered very romantic and all. Online dating just makes it easier to meet another person but also ignore matches, and if you don't ignore a match then I think people are still ready to dedicate themselves to their partner."

-Anonymous, 21

2. "Yes! Where are the meet-cutes?"

-Kat, 20

3. "Meeting online seems to be more normal than we think"

"Sort of, I also understand that nowadays people are so busy and the world is so high-tech that meeting online seems to be more normal than we think. I am guilty of telling people a different story on how I met my boyfriend though."

-Deb, 21

4. "You still have to meet them in person and win them over"

"In this day and age? I think it's an alright way to meet people and see if you can hold an actual convo with them. You still have to meet them in person and win them over and stuff."

-Georgette, 21

5. "No, we had still met in person prior, but this just connected us."

-Maggie, 21

6. "You can still be pretty romantic"

"Yes and no. Like it takes away from the cute 'this is how we met' story, but your relationship can still be pretty romantic even if you did meet online."

-Sarah, 21

7. "There's a level of distrust behind phones"

"For the most part, yes. I'd prefer to meet someone in person (ex: at a bar or through mutual friends) because I feel like there's a level of distrust behind phones. You can edit your profile to be a little deceiving. In person, you get exactly what you see. But I wouldn't be embarrassed if my next boyfriend were from social media."

-Anonymous, 21

8. "It all started with him saying 'Wanna see a meme?'"

"I think it's a different type of romance which is something we have to accept. The person I'm talking to now and I met on Tinder and it all started with him saying 'Wanna see a meme?' And we've been seeing each other for almost two months now!"

-Briana, 20

9. "I'm not opposed to online dating"

"Honestly, yes. I strongly believe in organically meeting and connecting with others. But I'm not opposed to online dating, it's worked for me in the past!"

-Grace, 19

10. "You get judged for extra as a girl"

"Yes, mostly because of the stigma/embarrassment associated with it and because people aren't public about saying that they met through apps. If more people said it it would become a lot more normalized, but since it doesn't the assumption seems to be that you were on the app for hookups (which you get judged for extra as a girl)."

-Anonymous, 19

11. "Nope! I found the love of my life online."

-Anonymous, 21

12. "The romance is what comes after that"

"Not at all. You meet through apps the way you used to meet through friends, but the romance is what comes after that."

-Beth, 21

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

5 Questions To Ask Yourself When You're On The Fence With A Guy

Is he worth it?


Whether you're contemplating if you want to continue your fling with a guy or contemplating breaking up with your boyfriend, there are always questions we're asking ourselves. Ranging from "is this right of me?" to "is this what will make me happy?" But if you are really sitting on the fence and don't know what to do next, check out these five questions you need to ask yourself if you're torn on what to do.

1. Do I want long term or short term?

This is a huge question to ask. If you're looking to settle down for a while, your guy may not want that. And it could always be the other way around as well. Make sure to decipher this with him so you both know what you want and no one gets a broken heart.

2. Can I see myself marrying this person?

I know this is a bold question to ask, especially if you're not dating. But really thinking about if you can see yourself with them for a long time can make it or break it. But say you're dating and you're on the fence of deciding you want to break up with them or not, think about if you can see yourself saying "I do" to them, and if you can't, let him go.

3. Can I see myself living with them/how do they live?

I've seen many people get engaged and move in together and later call it quits due to the way their partner lived. If you've been getting to know your guy for a while now and notices he lives like a pig, you may have to wonder if you'd be cleaning up those messes in the future.

4. How do they make me feel?

This question in a no brainer. If they make you feel bad, why even question continuing into the relationship.

5. Are they worth it?

Is he worth it? I know I have had some experiences when I was on the fence with a couple of guys and I've had to ask myself the same question. And when I'd question if he was worth it or not, my gut feeling always came out right. If you're looking to keep him around, always ask yourself if he's worth it.

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Girls, You NEED To Understand That Fuckboy Texting You ‘wyd’ 24/7 Will Never Give You A 24 Karat Ring

I finally managed to crack the code as to why your casual hookup will never try to make you his wife.

Elle Hong
Elle Hong

There are five unofficial steps of hookup culture: Find a guy. Get to know him a little bit, but not too much (because you have to keep "boundaries," remember?) Make a pact to keep things "casual" and promise to still be "friends" with each other. Then, hookup with him. And keep hooking up with him without any emotional attachment — just over and over again and never expect anything more.

From a birds eye view, hookup culture seems so harmless. I mean, what's more convenient than having a booty call at your doorstep with the swipe of a screen? When you want to hook up, all you have to do is shoot that 2 a.m. "U Up?" text.

Hell, I even wrote a whole article about the perfect FWB situation.

Yet suddenly—here I am, Elle Hong, resident "Uncuffed" writer on Swoon and self proclaimed fuckgirl who glorifies hookup culture above anything else, catching feelings and falling for the wrong guys just like any other girl out in the world.

Consider this blasphemy. Or maybe I'm just dying to make a confession.

A confession that I, too, have experienced the feeling of wondering why I was never enough for the guys I hooked up with. Why they never chose me over the girls they would eventually form serious relationships with and why to them I only was nothing more than a casual hookup.

So, I thought about it. I critically analyzed it. I "Aristotle-d" my way into trying to find an answer behind the impossible question of wondering why I was never considered to be anything more. Over the past few weeks, it essentially became my new research topic and now, I finally managed to crack the code as to why your casual hookup will never try to make you into wifey material. Here's why.

First and foremost: Guys usually (but not always) choose to hookup with girls who they don't see as anything more.

Now, keep in mind I'm not saying that guys will NEVER fall in love with the girls they hookup with because it can happen. It's life. Life is unpredictable. No doubt, people have fallen in love on Tinder and married a random match who just happened to become The One. But we all know what Tinder is really for. Generally speaking, guys will seek random hookups with the types of girls they think are "easy" and if they're desperate enough, it's definitely not going to be someone they view as their future wife.

If he thinks you're cute, you're within 10 miles radius and you can hold a conversation, it doesn't matter what your annual salary is or how many siblings you got—he wants one thing and it's to get you in bed. And until a guys find this girl who captures his heart and inevitably makes him want to settle, he's going to go around hooking up with random girls left and right. So in this case, it's not your fault. You're just with the wrong type of guy who only thinks of you as his sexual conquest.

See also: Guys want to settle with girls that don't go around hooking up with other people.

Ironic as hell because I just talked about why guys would never want to settle, period. But think about it—guys are humans with rational thoughts and animalistic desires. When they find their territory, they mark it. Once he finds a girl who is the one, he never wants to let her go. And he never wants to see that girl be with another guy or god forbid, go around hooking up with other guys. So here's the moral of the story to get my point across: I hate to break it to you, but bragging about how many other guys you're f*cking outside of your current FWB situationship isn't going to help develop the relationship any further.

Finally: A girl's "hoe phase" might seem empowering but for guys they see it as a threat.

Thanks to the wonderful millennial encyclopedia that we call Urban Dictionary, we have a definition behind this certain life style: A phase in life which occurs when a girl goes around social settings exploring herself, committing promiscuous acts and connecting with random people. For girls, it seems pretty damn empowering, doesn't it? For us it's a chance to let loose, to live a lil bit more and to run around as independent women. Nothing wrong with that of course.

But for guys to perceive this type of lifestyle, they see it as a threat which could arise if they form a relationship with you. It's simple logic here. A girl who's in her "hoe phase" is more likely to be unfaithful since they're always out and about with this person and that person. Put it this way: a guy doesn't care if you're a hoe—but he only wants you to be HIS hoe and not everyone else's. So you might think that it's a great way to express yourself and to enjoy your college years, but keep in mind that it could possibly be holding you back from taking the next step with your casual FWB.

Elle Hong
Elle Hong

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