7 Months Ago I Used To Google 'How To Make Breakup Pain Go Away' But I Got Through It And So Can You

7 Months Ago I Used To Google 'How To Make Breakup Pain Go Away' But I Got Through It And So Can You

Breakups are the worst, but the frustration that follows doesn't last forever. Here is some advice for someone who has gone through it.

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This is one of those topics that it's hard to form an introduction for. I could give you some cliché about how everything will get better, or some speech about how sucky a breakup is to go through, but I'm sure this is the same thing all those friends and family will tell you over what is supposed to be a reassuring phone call. Although you may feel hopeless right now, I can promise you that reading this article will restore that faith in you, even if it's for a short period of time.

In short, I was sitting in my same bed seven months ago Googling "how to make breakup pain go away". I had gone through more tissue boxes than I could keep track of, and a week felt way too long for me to continue to have these feelings. Much to my dismay, every single article said the same thing: "It will get better, just continue to have faith!". I wanted to chuck my computer across the room at that point. Seeing millions of people saying they're so much better after a breakup won't help you when you're down in the dumps, and I can attest to that firsthand. But, in what was the worst of my frustration, I found myself at a crossroads

I could continue to sulk in my misery, or I could choose to let myself grow. Objectively, growing is the obvious option, but when you're stuck in such a difficult spot, it's a lot harder to feel that motivation. But I was tired of it. I went to the mirror, looked at my puffy eyes, and decided that no matter how badly it hurt, I needed to face what I was going through, and stop being afraid of it. It's the only way I would grow.

And there was one obstacle in my way. Feelings. They're almost unpredictable, and they'll often confuse you. You will wish to eradicate and get rid of those emotions, and to be honest, the way to do that is what I looked for when I was doing my Google search. But, much to my dismay, I wasn't going to get through this if I didn't embrace these emotions. They're uncomfortable, daunting, and scary. But, this is something I feel like isn't said enough. You are human, and you are entitled to every emotion that you feel. There is not "good" or "bad", rather "uncomfortable" and "comfortable".

So give yourself a break from that negative self-talk. You don't "need" to not cry, or "need" to stop feeling sad. Because having feelings is important. It helps you contemplate what your relationship was, what you lost, and how you can move forward without that. If you don't give yourself the opportunity to feel these things, how can you move past them? So please, if there's anything I want you to read in this article, it's the following: Let yourself cry and cry until you have no tears left; let yourself be so frustrated that you scream and let it all out; let yourself reminisce over the memories and contemplate the magnitude of your loss. The only thing that you "should" be doing is working through your emotions.

I lied at the beginning of the article when I made fun of those silly clichés. I want you to realize that the same girl who googled these answers seven months ago is living a life better than she could've imagined. As a student, I have found so many reasons to love myself, the people around me, and the things I do. I have developed new passions, newfound confidence, and an incredible motivation that never would've existed before my breakup. I'm not here to tell you my sob story, but I want to show you that there is light at the end of the tunnel. Even if it's not clear now, I promise you that there will be soon. If there's nothing else that you take away from this, I want you to hang on. Hang on with all of that strong will that I know you are capable of having. Because in time, you will find that the other side of what seems like a mountain is absolutely beautiful.

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

To The Ex Who Won’t Move On, It’s Time To Let Go

Moving on is hard, but it’s time for you to realize I’m gone.

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It's been a year. It's been 365 days since I left you. I was ready for a change. Our relationship was unhealthy and very toxic. We argued constantly. You were very controlling, and it was time to end it. You knew you were the issue in the relationship and you knew what needed to be fixed.

You couldn't change.

After figuring out I couldn't live the rest of my life unhappy, I left. It was hard no doubt. We had good memories, but the bad outweighed the good. You never appreciated me. You weren't loyal to me and I never understand why. You always made me feel as if I was never enough.

I finally left you. You couldn't accept the fact that I was done. I told you I discovered my self-worth and you were angry. You didn't want to see me go. You called and texted me for weeks.

I ignored you.

You were so mad because I was finally done. You had convinced yourself that I would come back but little did you know, I wouldn't. You called and texted daily. You even called my job. You didn't understand. I could no longer listen to ongoing insults and constant accusations. I had enough of it.

When I didn't respond to your calls and texts, you began using text apps and calling me from restricted. You wouldn't stop. When you found out I moved on, it got worse. I begged you to stop and you wouldn't. I finally stopped responding. You still continue to try to contact me.

I need you to move on. I want to put everything behind us. I want you to go out and find someone to make you happy. I need you to realize you and I are over. I want you to move on like I did. I am happy now and I don't need you ruining that. To my ex who is struggling to move on, it's time to let go and move on.

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11 Sneaky Signs Your Relationship Is Headed For A Breakup

Sometimes it just comes out of nowhere.

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When you think of a breakup, you may think of weeks of screaming at each other, cheating, lying, and pretty much every other obvious sign you aren't meant for each other.

Sometimes, these signs aren't even there. There may be underlying signs that have been there for a while until it all bubbles up and, BOOM, the breakup happens.

Here are 11 subtle signs your relationship is headed for a breakup:

1. When your S.O.'s name pops up on your phone you feel like groaning.

Throughout your relationship, you would get butterflies when your S.O's name came on your phone. You would be dying to talk to them and tell them all about your day. If it feels like a chore, it might be time to revaluate the relationship.

2. If you live together, you find yourself hoping they aren't home when you get there.

Coming home to your S.O. at the end of every day should be rewarding and exciting. You need to be comfortable in your own living space.

3. You stop wanting to spend time together.

You don't need to spend every waking moment together, but when it seems more like more of a task to take time out of your day that isn't okay.

4. FaceTimes and phone calls become nonexistent.

And if they are existent, the love isn't there and they seem distracted.

5. When you are hanging out, you are checking the time and figuring out when you should leave.

Before, time would fly by and you would be wishing you had more time.

6. Going out on a date seems like a hassle more than an actual treat.

Date nights are rare in busy lives, but when planning them isn't exciting anymore it usually isn't a good sign.

7. When you look into the future you don't see them in it.

You had all your kids names picked out and now you can't even see the relationship getting through the next month.

8. The time between talking to each other increases.

You find yourself forgetting that you haven't talked in a while. And it doesn't necessarily bother you.

9. They irritate you more.

Just their face could bring out anger you didn't know you had.

10. The quirks you once found endearing are now annoying.

Remember the way he'd easily fall asleep in your arms and how it made you feel all gooey inside? Yeah, now it's like he's never awake when you're around.

11. When they stop doing the little things that once put a smile on your face.

No more random "you're beautiful" comments or spontaneous trips to your favorite places in town.

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