Cuffing Season May Have Ended But That Doesn't Mean My Shot At Love Has Gone With It
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This time last month, I thought I'd met a guy who would put an end to my vacant cuffing season. He checked off every box on my list and created new ones to add to it. I was in a daze and things went fast and I was perfectly fine with that. Voices in one ear said be careful, while voices in another said go for it. I let my guard down, and I got played, it's as simple as that. He got what he was after. It stung and it still does. He took a part of me with him through the door, and I don't think I'll ever get that back.

I am still coping, but I'm better than I was when it happened just two weeks ago. I'm ready to get back up on my horse and ride the trail of single life confidently again. Some may say cuffing season is over, but I have to disagree. I refuse to give up on the search for a relationship and neither should you.

Some people find their person earlier than others, and while I am jealous of that, I have to remember to remind myself that there's someone out there for everyone. He's probably figuring out life, just like I am, maybe wondering where the girl of his dreams is. I'll never know what he's up to, but I'm sure he's probably going through or has gone through similar issues. If I give up, and consume myself with the fact that I always end up single and will be forever, I'll never get anywhere in life. I know my worth and the right person will see that and snatch me up. In the meantime, there is no need to just sit around and wait for him to show up.

I'm a work in progress waiting for the mechanic to oil me up and set me free. I'm free, but I want someone to be free with if that makes sense. Yes, I'm struggling with some self-image issues at the moment, but everyone has their struggles. I'm at peace with the woman I am and am proud of how far I've come in my almost twenty-one years I've been on this Earth. You and I, we don't need to be with anyone who's anything less than what we want.

You deserve the moon and the stars and everything that lies beyond. You are priceless, and don't let anyone make you feel differently. Relationships are meant to develop as their destined to, so forcing anything won't work in anyone's favor. That being said, be open and honest with who you talk to, and let yourself be hurt. Hurt leads to happiness, whether we see it that way at the moment or not.

I've had my moments of hoping that boy will message me again, professing how sorry he is, and asking for another chance. I'm a forgiving person, so I try and hear everyone out, even if it's against my better judgment. I know that this trial is just leading on to someone better, and I refuse to let myself give up because a few busybodies think cuffing season is over.

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

I Am A Hopeless Romantic Living In A World Where One-Night Stands Are The Norm

It's the little things.

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In today's society, it can certainly start to feel like no one takes love seriously anymore.

Whether it's that one couple who has broken up and gotten back together more times than you can count, the two friends-with-benefits no one can figure out, your local womanizer, or just hookups in general, love and lust are a huge part of specifically college life and culture.

As a hopeless romantic, being part of a generation that "just wants to have fun" can be really frustrating, especially when you just want to find something real. It is so easy for people to put on a fake act just to get what they want and sometimes this can be extremely hard to see through. I'm sure we've all had some kind of incident with someone who played nice but had ulterior motives and the sad truth is that it can be impossible to recognize a person's artificiality.

I am a hopeless romantic.

I have always classified myself as such, and it has remained true. Sure, I can make the most of the freedoms I have as a single college woman, but deep down I just want to find my person.

I've had my fair share of letdowns, and I think we all have, but being a hopeless romantic makes it that much more difficult to get past the "what ifs" and fantasies that come along with starting something with someone new. We may already have our hearts set on a person when they decide they've gotten what they wanted and leave.

For me, I find myself caught up in the little things that someone does. I have always been someone who picks up on small details in situations, and sometimes this works against me.

I pick up on the small facial expressions that he may not even realize he is making; the ones that tell you when their guard has been let down, even just for a split second.

I pick up on the way he sits our two cellphones side by side on the nightstand, taking care to line them up perfectly as if that's just their spot.

I pick up on the short moments of laughter where he actually lets himself laugh and forgets about the act.

I pick up on things, and sometimes I end up hurting because of it.

When it comes down to it, though, I wouldn't change the way that I am. I wouldn't change the fact that I find myself in the search for more in a society that mostly only offers me less.

The trait that tends to hurt me most is also the one that I value most. Even if noticing all the little things is something that contributes to my own heartache, I love those moments. There is something beautiful about those tiny things shared by two people, even if the connection ends there.

Sure, it can be hard. But so can everything.

It's just a matter of finding the beauty.

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Dedicate Your Summer To Bettering Yourself For Yourself, Not Your Ex

Why waste energy on an ex who doesn't care about you anymore?

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I'm single for the summer (yet again, no shock there) but this summer there's something in the air that just feels different. It's the feeling of true acceptance of my single status.

Last summer I was single when I really didn't want to be. My heart with still holding out for a guy who wasn't interested in anything more than my friendship. It took me from late March all the way until Halloween to get over those feelings. However, while working through those tough feelings that summer, I came to enjoy my time on my own and not talking to anyone except my best friends. I didn't have to worry about when I'd get a text back, or if I'd be left on read, or who he'd be out with since I wasn't around. The only thing I needed to worry about was my paychecks and tan lines.

Sometimes after breaking things off with someone who you put so much effort into, whether it was a boyfriend, an almost relationship, or even a friend with benefits, it's easy to want to show off on social media and make them regret ever hurting you or ending things. Why? It's a nice little ego boost, sure, but after those few seconds of glee from the fact that you know they've seen and maybe even liked your picture or your tweet, or saw your story on Snapchat, do you still feel happy? No, you go right back to feeling like crap, whether you want to admit it or not. Stop making yourself all about them when that ship has sailed and start being all about you.

Your ex is off doing their own thing, maybe thinking about you, but obviously not enough to want you back in their life the way you used to be. They are probably out there finding a new person to take your spot because they don't have you at their beck and call anymore. If they're also showing off to show you how much better they are without you or to make you jealous...why are you still following them or still participating in this sick little game for attention? Grow up and block them so you don't have to keep seeing their posts, or be adult enough to stop if you're doing the same as well. If it's only you posting, chances are you just look stupid, so stop before you really embarrass yourself. I was that person, and I know first hand how embarrassed I am for acting the way I did.

Summer is synonymous for doing whatever the hell you want. Wear what you want, say what you want, and be the best version of yourself that only a high dose of Vitamin D can bring out. Your ex is an ex for many reasons. You have to set aside the summer for you and what benefits you only. Don't concern yourself with an ex who doesn't care in the least about you anymore. Coming from someone who posted thirst traps aimed at a specific person along with countless shady AF stories on Snap and Insta in the hopes that this one person and their friends would see it, just stop and save yourself the energy as well as regret.

We're all adults, it's time to stop the petty posts and photos. Post your thirst trap for yourself because you're a sexy queen who doesn't need anyone but herself. Once you start focusing on yourself this summer, instead of your ex, you'll realize just have great it feels to truly be free.

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