Finding A Hookup With One Swipe Is Ruining Actual Dating
Start writing a post
Swoon

Finding A Hookup With One Swipe Is Ruining Actual Dating

In this day and age, finding a suitable date or sex partner is as simple as ordering tickets to a sporting event.

95
Finding A Hookup With One Swipe Is Ruining Actual Dating
123rf

Whether it is your grandparents or the sweet couple you met at the grocery store, you probably know at least one elderly pair that has been married for more than 40 years and still goes out for date nights. And, if you get a chance to talk with them, they will probably jump at the opportunity to share the story of how they met. Most people dream of these off-chance encounters when they spot someone from across the room and spend the night making awkward eye contact until one of them musters up the courage to talk to the other. They imagine a story about the chase, where the guy spends weeks trying to win the girl’s affection or vice versa.

But this idealized love story has become rarer as we continue to embrace our tech-savvy society. Fewer people are meeting in person and instead, more of us are succumbing to the instant gratification provided by various dating apps.

While dating apps like Tinder, Grindr or OkCupid provide a convenient way to meet people, they strip away the authenticity that can only come from meeting someone organically in the "real" world. These apps offer a vast selection of potential suiters and give a person the power to accept or reject him/her based on looks and a sentence or two written about himself/herself.

Not only does this method of selecting a suitor within a matter of seconds seem superficial, it has also developed a culture of impatience and a need for a fast-paced lifestyle. In a world where people can purchase something, search something on Google, or even choose someone to date within a matter of clicks, it makes us expectant of instant feedback and quick results.

Slogans like, “Buy now with one click,” “Hassle-free service” or “Love is a swipe away,” intrigue us because the thought of working hard for love seems pointless when there are faster and more efficient ways of finding it. Why go and drive to a pizzeria when you can get one delivered within minutes? Why go to a store when you can buy everything you need from the comfort of your couch? Why humiliate yourself by approaching someone in public when you can analyze a vast array of eligible singles at your fingertips? In this day and age, finding a suitable date or sexual partner is as simple as ordering tickets to a sporting event.

Along with the rise of an impatient culture comes an even more prominent "hookup culture." The casual sex and relationships these apps culturally encourage results in a new attitude towards dating. Not only are relationships more face-paced, but they are also more short-lived.

Unfortunately, these apps promote the idea that one doesn’t have to put effort into a relationship; they can simply move on to the next person who may be "easier" and more inclined to go along with what they want. App users don’t have to face the repercussions of talking to multiple people at once, since it is easy to meet people from different social circles. They also don’t have to go through the tedious process of rejection because the lack of face-to-face encounters allows people to ditch or ‘ghost’ someone online with no consequence.

Don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of dating-app success stories out there and the apps wouldn’t be this successful if there weren’t people who enjoyed the lifestyle it offered. They allow you to meet unique people and strike up conversations you’d never have otherwise. There’s something addictive in the mindless task of swiping left or right. It has the potential to boost your confidence and dissolve your boredom. However, it’s important to grasp how these sites are affecting society and the dating world. The era of unforced and natural meet-ups is behind us as we enter a world where technology dictates our actions. Because of this, any hope for a romantic encounter that our grandparents likely shared is almost forgotten.

So, let’s not forget that meaningful relationships take time and effort and that cultivating honest conversation and substantial connections requires a boldness many of us seem to lack. Finding love is a lot more complicated and messier than what dating apps make it out to be. In the end, these apps are not a sufficient substitute for finding love, but rather an artificial mechanism that can be both temporary and insincere.

Report this Content
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

62230
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

40713
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

961434
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

208314
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments