What Is Breadcrumbing In Dating?

According to Urban Dictionary (and the paraphrased definition above), breadcrumbing is "when the 'crush' has no intentions of taking things further, but they like the attention. So they flirt here or there, send dm/texts just to keep the person interested, knowing damn well they're staying single."

In other words, it's when someone is overly flirtatious and making it seem like they like you when really they just like your attention and are leading you on. While it may seem harmless to some, it can actually be pretty painful if the person being breadcrumbed actually likes the breadcrumber (probably not a word but let's pretend it is, shall we?).

How Do You Deal With Someone Breadcrumbing You?

If you find yourself in a situation in which you are or suspect you are being breadcrumbed, ask yourself how it makes you feel. If you're also not interested in a relationship with the person and you don't mind the flirtation, just have fun! But if you like the person who's giving you mixed signals, you'll have to ask them what their intentions are — it just has to happen.

I know it sounds scary — "You want me to risk being rejected?!" — but you're going to have to talk to the person breadcrumbing in order to make it stop and protect your heart or figure out how they really feel. Because yes, the risk of doing it is potential rejection, but the risk of not doing it could lead to even worse heartbreak in the future.

I always say it's best to just do it. You won't get what you want without asking for it, so ask, have a conversation about it, and go from there.

Who knows! Maybe they weren't breadcrumbing after all and they actually like you! Fantastic. If they were breadcrumbing and they don't have feelings for you, though, it's going to be OK! It'll sting but you'll be better off in the long run. So bite the bullet either way and TALK IT OUT.

How Do You Respond To Breadcrumbing Texts And Advances?

Listen! I'm all for that flirty-flirty text exchange, as long as both people are on the same page about it. If one is innocently flirting without any true meaning behind it and the other is secretly in love with the person they're talking to, it's obviously going to get messy.

If you're not into it or feel like they're manipulating your feelings, defuse the situation by changing the topic or, if you're feeling annoyed by it, calling them out! Unless they have an interest in you, there's no real reason to flirt anyway, so put an end to it.

What Is The Point Of Breadcrumbing?

If a person is breadcrumbing you, they're looking for attention! It's really that simple. It likely doesn't have to do with them wanting to hurt or manipulate you. Instead, it just means you're giving them the attention they want at the moment and since you're not demanding anything different or more from them, that's all they'll give.

Until you put your foot down and tell them you don't want a part of it or you're looking for something more than what they're giving you, they'll continue breadcrumbing you.

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