If You Are 'Dating To Marry' In 2019, You're Missing Out On The Real Dating Scene

Lately I've been hearing (and seeing on Twitter) claims of "I'm dating to get married" or pompous accusations of "people shouldn't date unless they're dating for marriage." While I appreciate the concept of taking romantic relationships seriously, I'm not here for the idea that everyone's end goal should be marriage in every single relationship.


Well, first of all, because not everyone wants to get married.

I know, crazy to think that some people might not be obsessed with the idea of a white dress in a church on a Saturday with all the people who love them. Or maybe it's just that some people aren't in love with the idea of spending the next 50 years with only one person.

Marriage is a pretty weird social construct if you think about it, and some people just aren't interested in that being their end goal.

But I also personally believe that even if you do want to get married at some point, that shouldn't mean you can only date people with the intention of marrying them.

What's so wrong with dating just for dating's sake?

After all, dating because you want a relationship without marriage has plenty of perks. Dating around can help you figure out what you want in a significant other, which can lead you closer to understanding who you might want to marry one day. And maybe that ends up being that partner you started off dating without the intention of marriage. But how are you supposed to know who you want to be with if you don't have some experience under your belt?

Plus, let's just be honest with ourselves, dating is fun.

It's fun to get to know someone, it's fun to go on dates, it's fun to have someone special in your life, and it's fun to play around (if you know what I mean). And although it's not fun to go through the breakup, sometimes it's necessary.

If you want to date only because you have marriage on the mind, then by all means, feel free to do so. But in the meantime, can we please move past attacking people who just want to date for the fun of it? You need to stop judging people for wanting different things out of a relationship than you. We need to start accepting that romance comes in various forms, all of which are beautiful.

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

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If You Go Into Summer 2019 Only Wanting A Summer Fling, You're Only Going To Be Disappointed

They may be fun but sometimes come with consequences.


We've all been through the summer flings. Summer is THE season where you have no commitment and are as free as can be with no care in the world. I've been on both ends of summer flings, from having one and cutting things off when summer ended and having one and gaining feelings for the other person... I've actually been dating my summer fling from 2017 for almost a year and a half now which was totally unexpected.

Back in Summer 2017, I was newly single and wasn't intentionally looking for a relationship since I just got out of one. I had a couple of small flings in the beginning, nothing serious at all. Until I met a boy in July from social media. We started talking and hit it off. We had a lot in common and enjoyed a lot of the same things. After a few weeks of talking, some flirting and a couple of dates... we had a fling going on. We weren't committed or anything, but we were both interested in each other. Long story short, I ended up really liking this guy and I could feel our fling diminishing, so I guess you could say I played some hard to get and "won" him over for good. It took a lot and I could definitely say it wasn't a care-free summer since I was trying to get him to make it official with me but now, here we are as boyfriend and girlfriend still to this day.

From my experiences and from friends experiences, summer flings almost always end with someone falling for you or you falling for them. And if you're really not looking for a relationship after summer, it can be quite hassle ending things for good due to feelings. Summer flings can also take time away from your family and friends. Everyone knows spending summer with someone you're interested in is fun, although it most likely won't be permanent, so why waste your time on them when you could be making those summer memories with your friends who will be there always?

A lot of the times, summer flings just involve hooking up and casual dates... nothing too serious. They don't involve "relationship" type feelings. But when you start to gain attachment to that person, sometimes they won't care like you do since summer flings are meant to be temporary. Of course, the person you have a fling with is someone you're into or at least think is good looking and when you find out you're not their only summer fling, jealousy can hit. Like stated above, summer is the season of no worries, and you shouldn't let jealousy take over your care-free attitude.

Summer flings, almost all the time, end in some sort of heartbreak when that isn't the intention in the beginning at all. But other times, they do work out and you guys call it quits and both move on or both end up in a relationship with each other (which was my case and I couldn't be happier to this day!). So, if your plan is to have a fling this upcoming summer, make sure you plan ahead for any type of scenarios that could potentially happen as well as know what you both want in the end.

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