Find Someone Who Does These 9 Things In Your Relationship Or Move On

Find Someone Who Does These 9 Things In Your Relationship Or Move On

Life is too short to waste your time on individuals not worthy of it.

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I'm not gonna lie, I've had my fair share of first dates, relationships, breakups, and even the occasional breakdown. (Happens to the best of us, right?) Well, at this point, I finally decided that I am fed up with guys constantly wasting my time. I have compiled a running list of what I consider "musts" for a partner of mine, and they are all things I would do for my S.O. in return.

Life's too short to keep wasting time, and if you aren't dating to marry, what are you doing?

1. Holds the door, and your hand

I think it's important to find someone who is willing to take the extra step to open a door, as old-fashioned as that sounds. I'm always super impressed when a date will open his car door for me too. It's not that hard. I'm all for being an "independent woman," but I like a little effort every once in a while.

As for the hand-holding thing, it may not be everyone's thing, but if one person likes it, it's the partner's responsibility to compromise every now and then, which leads me to number two.

2. Compromises

Everyone is different. That's what makes us so interesting. However, this means that we're all interested in different things. When you're with someone, it is so important to make an effort to do things that they like and for them to do the same for you.

3. Is there for you on your best days, and your worst ones

Whether you need a personal cheerleader or a shoulder to cry on, your partner should be that person for you, and if they aren't, get away from all that.

4. Compliments you and helps you feel like your best self

Of course, no girl needs a man. However, it's really nice to hear a nice comment every now and then. If I'm gonna spend multiple hours on my appearance, I want you to acknowledge it a little bit. It's not about validation, it's about appreciation.

5. Supports you in what you do

Whether it's writing articles on Odyssey, performing in a dance recital, or even just taking a test, find yourself someone who will support you through the minor and major events in your life. It means the world to have a cheerleader in the crowd just for you, other than Mom, of course.

6. Loves you for you, regardless of the time of day

I never want to be with someone who makes me afraid to go in public with my natural hair, makeup on, or a visible zit. I've talked to guys in the past that would have me on edge, making sure that every piece of hair was curled perfect but never with any lipstick on. I'm the type of person who loves a good curl as much as a cute ponytail-scrunchie combo, and I love my red lipstick as much as I love a good pink sparkly gloss. Luckily, I have reached a point in my life where I couldn't care less if the person I'm with doesn't like any hair color other than bleach blonde, and I couldn't be happier. I'm doing me for me, and I know someday I will find someone who will appreciate, respect, and love that.

7. Checks up on you

This is so important. I repeat. So important. Somedays, it's hard to just come out and admit that things just aren't OK. Find someone who will take the initiative to truly care about how you're doing, even if it's just a "Do you need anything from the store?" or a "Wanna go for a drive?" text.

8. Loves you. (And only you!)

This is a big one! Once you lock things down and commit to someone, commit to just them. If you think about anyone else when you're with your significant other, you might as well not even be with them. Loyalty and honesty are key for a good relationship and bond.

9. Communicates

This is probably the most important one to me. Communication is the foundation for a good environment, whether it be in a relationship, friendship, at a job, or even in a college class. More importantly — try to communicate in person. Texting how you feel never shows how you feel.

I could keep going, but these ones truly are key. These are all things I would do for someone I love, and I expect nothing less in return. I'm tired of wasting my time, and others should be too. Find someone who matches your energy instead of bringing it down.

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

11 Things The Man You Love Should Do For You, No Questions Asked

Sometimes it's just the simple things in life that mean a lot.

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Every girl feels special when the guy she's dating does simple things for her that not everyone thinks about. Here's a list of 10 things that every girl genuinely appreciates.

1. Open/Hold the door

I feel like this one is really simple because everyone has to walk through doors. Chivalry isn't dead, let him open the door for you. He's not trying to prove that you can't do it for yourself, but he's trying to be polite and show you that he cares for you.

2. Give you really big hugs

Everyone has bad days, and sometimes you just need a really big hug. Whether it be a bear hug or the hug where he picks you up and spins you around, it will make you feel better in the long run.

3. Buy you really small gifts

One of the best things my boyfriend has ever done for me is simply bringing me a Dr. Pepper when he knows I'm tired from a long hard day full of exams or work. Sonic slushes will also make my day in a heartbeat.

4. Text/Call you just to tell you he loves you

This is pretty simple. It takes less than 10 seconds to text, and only a few minutes to call. Sometimes you get these texts right at the perfect moment, and it makes you feel so much better.

5. Come see you when you're sick

Everyone hates being sick. But seeing your friends and family while you're sick can make you feel so much better. Having your boyfriend come to see you and possibly even take care of you just makes being sick that much easier.

6. Respect your decisions

You're not married yet, so your decisions are up to you! He should respect the decisions you make and support you, even if it's not what he thinks is the best decision. After all, you know yourself better than anyone else!

7. Give you a shoulder to cry on

We all have bad days, and sometimes you just can't stop the tears from coming. Even if he's not good with crying, he should give you hugs and love to help you get through it.

8. Compliment you

Even if you look horrible and know so, hopefully, he'll still tell you that you look good. Even if the clothes you're wearing aren't his style, he should still tell you that they look good on you and that you are beautiful each and every day.

9. Call you when you're away or he's away

If you're like me, I miss my boyfriend after being away for about three hours, so when we're apart for more than a couple days, I love getting random calls from him when he knows I'm not busy. It's definitely better than a text.

10. Deal with all your annoying quirks

So if you're anything like me, you enjoy screaming music as loudly and horribly as you can in the car and making a complete fool of yourself, but he should love you for that anyway. I also love to take really stupid pictures, and he should put up with that too. He shouldn't be annoyed by your quirks, he should love them and laugh along with you.

11. Love you no matter what

I honestly feel like this goes without saying, but I put it on here so that the girls who don't feel like they're being loved no matter what can realize. He should want to work out problems with you instead of calling it quits and holding a grudge. He should want you to be happy and support you in every decision you make in life. When he loves you unconditionally, he will do all of the above things and more.

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I Finally Got A Boyfriend Who Respects Open Communication And It's Changed My Whole Perspective On Dating

It's the most important thing a relationship can have.

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Growing up, I always thought that the person you're dating should be your best friend. I thought they should know absolutely everything about you, knowing you better than you know yourself. You knew you could always go to them about anything, no matter what it was, and they would be there for you and love you the same.

Unfortunately, sometimes that's not always the case. Sometimes an attempt at open communication only leads to yelling, shaming, and withholding.

I have a tendency to say how I'm feeling all the time, not really having boundaries about my private life and feelings. Part of that comes from my struggles with my mental health and wanting to talk about it to erase the stigma, and the other part of that comes from me just being an extrovert.

In my last relationship, this part of who I was became a burden to him. My feelings and the consequences of having spiraling mental health at the time only made him angry with me. I learned the hard way that I couldn't communicate openly with someone I had grown to love, someone I had thought I could always talk to about everything. I learned the hard way that this was no longer love, that this was no longer healthy.

It got to the point where I just shoved my feelings down inside me. I believed that everyone felt the way he did whenever I would open my mouth about things he didn't like or necessarily approve of. Instead of being the expressive person I was before, I became closed off, only opening up completely to one or two people I felt I could still trust.

Getting out of that relationship was like a breath of fresh air. I realized the toxicity of the way that I was being treated and how open communication became impossible. I realized I shouldn't have to be fearful of talking about how I feel or even just hanging out with friends due to the possibility of being yelled at for seemingly no reason again.

Now, I've learned what a healthy relationship is. When I was younger, I always thought my boyfriend would be my best friend and now he is. We talk about everything, and I know that if I'm feeling like my depression is acting up or if I get upset by something he did unintentionally, I can have a calm and genuine discussion with him. I don't have to tiptoe around my word choices to try to find a way to say how I feel without angering him.

I may get annoying, but he's never once yelled at me or shamed me for how or what I'm feeling. He treats every single thought and feeling I've ever had as if they are the most valid and important things he's ever heard of. He knows that talking about problems and feelings is important to me, and he makes sure that he communicates how he feels to me as well. We've created a safe and healthy environment with each other.

After my last relationship, I didn't really know what healthy love and communication were like anymore. I was very anxious the first time my boyfriend and I had a discussion about something that bothered me because I was afraid of being yelled at again. I thought that was just how people would treat me from that moment forward. He restored my faith in love, and he showed me that open communication is the most important thing a relationship can have. We are so strong and so in love, and a lot of that can be credited to how we talk to one another.

I finally got a boyfriend who respects open communication and it truly changed my entire perspective on dating. I learned that if a relationship doesn't feel like a safe place where you can talk about anything and everything to your best friend, it's not a healthy relationship like you think it is.

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