Yes, I am the girl who had claimed she had found the one-when she indeed did not.
Not only did I say it, but I felt it too. With every fiber that I once felt when he kissed me, I felt it when I mumbled, "he's the one" to anyone other than myself—which wasn't many. I didn't trust other people not to judge my eager heart, but at the same time, I cared very little.
Love does something strange to both your mind and your heart. It makes you care less about others' blessings and more about your own.
I was willing to take nothing but my own if it ensured we had a life together, but what's even more important than having your own blessing is also having his—and I came to learn that was a harder thing to come by than I had originally anticipated.
I think the majority of people who have said "he's the one" often regret it. Maybe they even meet someone else who makes the thought that they could ever have even mumbled those words... Baffling!
However, I don't regret it because, at one point in time, I thought he was the one, and that feeling...that confidence...that complete bliss I felt in the moment when I said those words, I could not and would not undo.
I was so sure he was actually it for me. He had all of the qualities I saw in my future husband, and he had this authority, not that he demanded it, but was just present from his presence, and I grew to admire that. He walked into a room and knew what he wanted, so why couldn't I? Why was it so unrealistic for me to be sure?
Maybe it was because what I felt so sure about, didn't end up working for me, but that's okay.
Personally, I believe if you feel something that you're 100% confident in, you should be able to express it without feeling the excess backlash from people if what you felt doesn't work out in the way you wanted it to. In my specific case, it wasn't a lack of feelings/sureness on my end, so why is it frowned upon to sit back and say:
"Yes, I thought I had met the one, but it turns out I wasn't his."
"No, I'm not going to end up with my original one, but I'll end up with a new one soon enough."
"Maybe there is more than one person we will feel sure about in our lifetime."
I might say it three more times before I actually get it right, hell maybe it'll be 10, but honestly, I'll count myself lucky if I'm able to feel the love I felt with my original one with anyone else in this one life of mine.
Can you imagine feeling so head over heels in love that you are confident in that moment, there is not one other person in the world you feel could bring you that same level of happiness?
I was that confident, and I know I am capable of feeling that confidence again.
Hell, I already have.
"He's the one," are just three little words that show the outside world, the partner you have, and even yourself that where you're at right at that moment, is a moment you're comfortable holding onto forever.
He is someone you are comfortable holding onto forever.
So yeah, I hope you say he's the one. I hope you feel that with someone, and I also hope no amount of pressure or backlash from jealous people ever scare you away from that. I hope you only have to say it once for your sake, but if you don't, know that's okay too, and try to tell yourself that being able to look forward to saying it again, will be worth the wait.
I know it was for me.