10 Things You Should Know About a Guy Before You Date Him

10 Things You Should Know About a Guy Before You Date Him

Get to know him BEFORE saying yes
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So you've got your eye on that cutie who's been in your life as of late and you're wondering whether or not he could be serious boyfriend material. We've all been there, and we've found that there are some very good indicators of this that you can find when you take a look at his everyday life.

Here are a few things you should know about someone BEFORE you date them:


1. How he treats his family

How a guy interacts with his family is often very closely aligned with how he'll interact with a significant other. Pay special attention to his attitude toward his mother and his sisters, if he has any, is he respectful towards the women in his life or does his behavior leave a lot to be desired?

2. If he keeps himself clean and well-groomed

Because most of us find nothing appealing about dating men who smell like middle school boys coming straight from gym class. He doesn't have to be overly meticulous about trimming his hair or keeping his beard neat, but if he's got a serious case of B.O. or habitually forgets to brush his teeth…yikes. Cleanliness is next to godliness, my guy.

3. If he's motivated and wants to be successful in life

Nobody wants to settle down with a man who barely has a grasp on tomorrow, let alone his academic and career plans. It's more than okay if he doesn't have everything figured out because he's young and has time to think it through. But if he continuously skips and fails classes, calls out of work, and neglects a lot of his other daily responsibilities, he probably will give your relationship the bare minimum, too.

4. What kinds of friends he has

Take a look at the people he calls his closest friends—they're probably very similar to him in terms of personality and hold the same kinds of morals and beliefs as he does. While who he associates with in his free time doesn't necessarily define him, the nature of his friendships will shed some light on the basics of what he's looking for in a romantic relationship.

5. How he treats restaurant staff

Is he polite to the host/hostess when he first walks in with you? Does he speak kindly to his waiter/waitress and not react too harshly to any inconveniences throughout the meal? Does he give a decent tip (whatever he can afford)? Trust me, dear— if he's talking down to the waitress or yelling at the waiter, he is definitely not the kind of guy you'd want to enjoy a candlelit dinner with.

6. When he asks you to hang out

If he's only ever calling in the dead of night to see if you want to "come over and chill," he's probably not looking for a serious relationship unless he's made it very clear that that's what he wants. Try not to get your hopes up for a guy who only texts you when he's drunk or horny— he's not in it for commitment.

7. What he does in his free time

How someone spends their spare time throughout the day says a lot about their interests and their goals. Show that you want to get to know him by asking him about what his hobbies are. Even if his favorite pastimes are radically different from yours, that doesn't mean you won't be compatible; you can show each other new things and bond over those experiences.

8. What it's like at his place

When it comes to housekeeping, guys will be guys— you can expect some dirty laundry strewn about or crumbs from a bag of chips in his bed. But take note of whether or not he's tidied up for you at least a little bit. See if he offers you anything to drink or eat if you're there for a while, if he has any pets, and if he's eager to introduce you to his roommates. You're in his home and, if he sees any kind of future with you, he'll do his best to make you feel welcome.

9. The date plans he suggests

Your guy doesn't have to be a master of romance, but it's always the thought that counts. And if he doesn't seem to put much thought into coming up with ideas for dates or says "I don't care where we go" more often than not, he isn't worth wasting your time over. Also, if all of his proposed "dates" are just "Netflix and chill" hookup sessions…enough said.

10. If he's comfortable with having feelings

A mature guy is one who acknowledges that he has emotions and that he can express them freely without compromising his masculinity. There's a difference between being insecure about his feelings and being too afraid of how his boys would perceive him if he shows how much he cares about you. Take note of how confident he is of his self-image when it comes to how he feels and demonstrates his emotions.

Ladies, when you're scouting out the dating scene, make sure you do your research!

Cover Image Credit: Tumblr

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

I Am A Hopeless Romantic Living In A World Where One-Night Stands Are The Norm

It's the little things.

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In today's society, it can certainly start to feel like no one takes love seriously anymore.

Whether it's that one couple who has broken up and gotten back together more times than you can count, the two friends-with-benefits no one can figure out, your local womanizer, or just hookups in general, love and lust are a huge part of specifically college life and culture.

As a hopeless romantic, being part of a generation that "just wants to have fun" can be really frustrating, especially when you just want to find something real. It is so easy for people to put on a fake act just to get what they want and sometimes this can be extremely hard to see through. I'm sure we've all had some kind of incident with someone who played nice but had ulterior motives and the sad truth is that it can be impossible to recognize a person's artificiality.

I am a hopeless romantic.

I have always classified myself as such, and it has remained true. Sure, I can make the most of the freedoms I have as a single college woman, but deep down I just want to find my person.

I've had my fair share of letdowns, and I think we all have, but being a hopeless romantic makes it that much more difficult to get past the "what ifs" and fantasies that come along with starting something with someone new. We may already have our hearts set on a person when they decide they've gotten what they wanted and leave.

For me, I find myself caught up in the little things that someone does. I have always been someone who picks up on small details in situations, and sometimes this works against me.

I pick up on the small facial expressions that he may not even realize he is making; the ones that tell you when their guard has been let down, even just for a split second.

I pick up on the way he sits our two cellphones side by side on the nightstand, taking care to line them up perfectly as if that's just their spot.

I pick up on the short moments of laughter where he actually lets himself laugh and forgets about the act.

I pick up on things, and sometimes I end up hurting because of it.

When it comes down to it, though, I wouldn't change the way that I am. I wouldn't change the fact that I find myself in the search for more in a society that mostly only offers me less.

The trait that tends to hurt me most is also the one that I value most. Even if noticing all the little things is something that contributes to my own heartache, I love those moments. There is something beautiful about those tiny things shared by two people, even if the connection ends there.

Sure, it can be hard. But so can everything.

It's just a matter of finding the beauty.

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Dedicate Your Summer To Bettering Yourself For Yourself, Not Your Ex

Why waste energy on an ex who doesn't care about you anymore?

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I'm single for the summer (yet again, no shock there) but this summer there's something in the air that just feels different. It's the feeling of true acceptance of my single status.

Last summer I was single when I really didn't want to be. My heart with still holding out for a guy who wasn't interested in anything more than my friendship. It took me from late March all the way until Halloween to get over those feelings. However, while working through those tough feelings that summer, I came to enjoy my time on my own and not talking to anyone except my best friends. I didn't have to worry about when I'd get a text back, or if I'd be left on read, or who he'd be out with since I wasn't around. The only thing I needed to worry about was my paychecks and tan lines.

Sometimes after breaking things off with someone who you put so much effort into, whether it was a boyfriend, an almost relationship, or even a friend with benefits, it's easy to want to show off on social media and make them regret ever hurting you or ending things. Why? It's a nice little ego boost, sure, but after those few seconds of glee from the fact that you know they've seen and maybe even liked your picture or your tweet, or saw your story on Snapchat, do you still feel happy? No, you go right back to feeling like crap, whether you want to admit it or not. Stop making yourself all about them when that ship has sailed and start being all about you.

Your ex is off doing their own thing, maybe thinking about you, but obviously not enough to want you back in their life the way you used to be. They are probably out there finding a new person to take your spot because they don't have you at their beck and call anymore. If they're also showing off to show you how much better they are without you or to make you jealous...why are you still following them or still participating in this sick little game for attention? Grow up and block them so you don't have to keep seeing their posts, or be adult enough to stop if you're doing the same as well. If it's only you posting, chances are you just look stupid, so stop before you really embarrass yourself. I was that person, and I know first hand how embarrassed I am for acting the way I did.

Summer is synonymous for doing whatever the hell you want. Wear what you want, say what you want, and be the best version of yourself that only a high dose of Vitamin D can bring out. Your ex is an ex for many reasons. You have to set aside the summer for you and what benefits you only. Don't concern yourself with an ex who doesn't care in the least about you anymore. Coming from someone who posted thirst traps aimed at a specific person along with countless shady AF stories on Snap and Insta in the hopes that this one person and their friends would see it, just stop and save yourself the energy as well as regret.

We're all adults, it's time to stop the petty posts and photos. Post your thirst trap for yourself because you're a sexy queen who doesn't need anyone but herself. Once you start focusing on yourself this summer, instead of your ex, you'll realize just have great it feels to truly be free.

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