To The Girl Healing From An Abusive Relationship, You Are NOT Alone
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To The Girl Healing From An Abusive Relationship, You Are NOT Alone

First step: Deep breath.

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To The Girl Healing From An Abusive Relationship, You Are NOT Alone

I've been there. After such a long time of fighting your way out of hurt and abuse just to wind up in the same spot time and time again, you get exhausted.

Physically. Emotionally. Mentally. But listen to these words: You gained the strength to never fall trap to that abuse again, and I'm proud of you.

Push aside other peoples' opinions for a minute. I bet you're being bombarded with questions like:

"What did they do to you?"

"Why didn't you leave sooner?"

"Was it really that bad?"

The one question I want to focus on is the second: Why didn't you leave sooner? Any girl who has gotten out of an abusive relationship can agree that in that environment, there seems to be no room for hope or strength. We are taught this completely warped view that somehow it's our fault that they laid a hand on us, our fault that they called us names, our fault that they blamed all of their problems on us. But, in reality, we didn't cause any of those things, and we never did. But, we believe it is normal, that we should grow accustomed to it.

Today, you woke up free. You are not chained to that abuse anymore.

You don't have to constantly look over your shoulder, afraid of the twisted normalcy you've been living in. You don't have to walk on thin ice, scared for your wellbeing. You found it within yourself to muster up the courage to say I'm done, and that, in itself, is worth celebrating.

So, from the girl who's been out of an abusive relationship for a while, know that it gets easier each day, or you might have days when you want to slip into old habits. However, know that you did not deserve any abuse that you had to endure. Know that the strength you possess will get you anywhere you want to go. Know your actions may have inspired other trapped girls to say I'm done, too.

As the days go by, remember who you are, and the freedom your life will have from here on out. Rekindle the friendships you were forced to cut out. Take that class your significant other told you you'd never succeed in. Do whatever you want, when you want, and how you want, because there's no one controlling those movements for you anymore.

Remember you're never alone, and that now, you're your own hero.

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