To the girl who's afraid she might like girls,
I know exactly how it feels to question such an intimate aspect of your identity. It's terrifying and strange and exhilarating all at once, isn't it?
That first true moment of self-questioning probably hit you out of nowhere. You felt a cold shiver slink slowly down your spine when you realized you were focusing less on your best friend's outfit and more on how well it fit her. You wondered for the longest time why that girl who sat beside you in your lecture hall could give you butterflies with an accidental brush of her hand against yours. Or maybe you found yourself inexplicably drawn to stories, art, and films that featured and focused on women loving other women. However you came about recognizing your not-so-platonic thoughts about other girls doesn't matter.
What matters now is that you give yourself exactly what you deserve: a chance to explore your blossoming feelings without feeling guilty for having them at all.
I know you're afraid—and your fear is definitely justified. Only recently did the government decide that LGBT individuals can marry by law across the nation, and even still there are other glaring issues that have not been solved by that. Maybe you've been raised in the Catholic image and are expected to live by it forever. Maybe you heard your parents make a snide comment one night over dinner about a celebrity that just came out. Or maybe you just don't care for the idea that you're different from other people in your life in a really significant way.
I'm here to tell you that that's okay. It's more than okay, darling. Because while your peers and society, in general, can pressure you immensely into believing that your instincts and feelings are wrong, only you can take their words to heart or decide to let them go. And I strongly advise that you let them go, because who are they to interfere with your happiness?
Let them judge you, dear, for they don't know you. They see you merely as your sexuality or sexual curiosity, and that's just a result of their own ignorance. You're not to blame for their blindness. You can wish them well and hope that they open their eyes one day, but don't you ever let them make you feel like you're anything less than human.
Exploring your sexuality for the first time is just like any other new experience. It's got you treading some shaky ground, but that doesn't mean you should give up. It's okay to be so nervous that you almost chicken out and tell her that no, you won't dance with her. Hell, it's okay even to chicken out that night. But you better not take that as an excuse to back down for life.
If you had even the slightest desire to kiss her, or dance with her, or hold her hand, that means something. What it means is that there's potentially a whole new realm of love for you to dive into.
And there's no reason why you should limit yourself and hold yourself back from seeing what's out there for you.
So to the girl who's afraid she might like girls… know that you are brave enough to look at who you are and love yourself without changing a thing. All it takes is the strength to admit how you feel and the bravery to consider acting on it.
And no matter who you end up with, you will always, ALWAYS be enough and deserving of the very best love they can give you.