They Say Guys Love The Chase But I'm A Girl And I LOVE It
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According to Urban Dictionary, "the chase: one person's romantic pursuit of another, oftentimes not fueled by an actual desire for a relationship." But in reality, can be fueled for an actual desire of a relationship. I've been on both ends of the spectrum for wanting to have fun or actually settling down for a relationship.

The chase is seriously just a thrilling and fun (sometimes) experience which is why I feel like so many guys like it.

I was in a two-year relationship during my sophomore year to senior year in high school. I was young and never really experienced chasing. We broke up and it was like a whole new world for me. Being single was weird and I was thinking that I wasn't quite sure how to do it again. I put myself out into the world of singles eventually and everything was feeling normal again.

Men are known for the infamous chase. I've heard countless stories from my girlfriends about how they thought this guy was really into them and then when it actually started to get somewhat serious, he cut things off. I have also had similar experiences back when I was a freshman in high school, I'm pretty sure almost every girl has.

I started talking to some guys here and there, nothing too serious since I wasn't quite ready for a relationship but I was ready to get out there. I know how guys work, I was in the sport of wrestling for eight years of my life, which was an all boy team and have some amazing guy friends. They would tell me their problems or tell me stories about their lives with girls. Either they were trying to win her over to end up being in a relationship or they were simply just looking for a hookup. When my time came, I wasn't directly looking for anything and if things worked out with one guy and a relationship happens, then it happens. I was just riding along.

When I was getting to know some boys, I was keeping my mind open. I wasn't trying super hard to impress them or anything like that but I always wanted to keep them interested just in case I could see anything happening with them in the future. I started realizing that I was pretty much chasing these guys. There was a challenge of trying to keep them interested in talking to me because you know, girls love attention. I realized that I was chasing these guys... and I loved the thrill of it.

Once I started seeing that some of these guys really didn't care, I started acting like I didn't care and then it really hit them. I still wasn't really looking to settle down quite yet, so once a guy would seem like he wanted something more with me, I'd cut him out (which was probably a fuckboy move on my part... oops). The more and more I kept chasing, I became aware of why guys love to chase.

The adrenaline rush and the challenge was perfect because of how competitive I am as a person... until I met my now boyfriend.

He was definitely the biggest chase I've experienced. He was hot, funny and well liked. I felt like I couldn't even have a chance with him but I shot my shot anyway. As time passed, I pretty much noticed he was doing "the chase" with me as well. I got to know him more and more and I ended up falling for him and wanted more than just talking or a hookup. As two months passed of talking, hanging out and really getting to know each other, I knew I really wanted him. He was keeping his distance, making it seem like he was busy and whatever. The thrill of chasing ended up getting frustrating for me at this point, but I still loved the challenge and picked up my game. I started talking to him less and less which was basically letting him think that "I was losing interest in him."

We have been talking for about four months at this spot. He noticed it and I kept going on with it for about another week or two, soon enough he told me he liked me and asked me to be his girlfriend. The chase worked out in my favor!

Long story short ladies, guys aren't the only ones who can do "the chase." I did it, found out I love doing it because it was such a thrill and it ended up working out for me and I scored myself my current boyfriend.

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

I Am A Hopeless Romantic Living In A World Where One-Night Stands Are The Norm

It's the little things.

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In today's society, it can certainly start to feel like no one takes love seriously anymore.

Whether it's that one couple who has broken up and gotten back together more times than you can count, the two friends-with-benefits no one can figure out, your local womanizer, or just hookups in general, love and lust are a huge part of specifically college life and culture.

As a hopeless romantic, being part of a generation that "just wants to have fun" can be really frustrating, especially when you just want to find something real. It is so easy for people to put on a fake act just to get what they want and sometimes this can be extremely hard to see through. I'm sure we've all had some kind of incident with someone who played nice but had ulterior motives and the sad truth is that it can be impossible to recognize a person's artificiality.

I am a hopeless romantic.

I have always classified myself as such, and it has remained true. Sure, I can make the most of the freedoms I have as a single college woman, but deep down I just want to find my person.

I've had my fair share of letdowns, and I think we all have, but being a hopeless romantic makes it that much more difficult to get past the "what ifs" and fantasies that come along with starting something with someone new. We may already have our hearts set on a person when they decide they've gotten what they wanted and leave.

For me, I find myself caught up in the little things that someone does. I have always been someone who picks up on small details in situations, and sometimes this works against me.

I pick up on the small facial expressions that he may not even realize he is making; the ones that tell you when their guard has been let down, even just for a split second.

I pick up on the way he sits our two cellphones side by side on the nightstand, taking care to line them up perfectly as if that's just their spot.

I pick up on the short moments of laughter where he actually lets himself laugh and forgets about the act.

I pick up on things, and sometimes I end up hurting because of it.

When it comes down to it, though, I wouldn't change the way that I am. I wouldn't change the fact that I find myself in the search for more in a society that mostly only offers me less.

The trait that tends to hurt me most is also the one that I value most. Even if noticing all the little things is something that contributes to my own heartache, I love those moments. There is something beautiful about those tiny things shared by two people, even if the connection ends there.

Sure, it can be hard. But so can everything.

It's just a matter of finding the beauty.

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Dedicate Your Summer To Bettering Yourself For Yourself, Not Your Ex

Why waste energy on an ex who doesn't care about you anymore?

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I'm single for the summer (yet again, no shock there) but this summer there's something in the air that just feels different. It's the feeling of true acceptance of my single status.

Last summer I was single when I really didn't want to be. My heart with still holding out for a guy who wasn't interested in anything more than my friendship. It took me from late March all the way until Halloween to get over those feelings. However, while working through those tough feelings that summer, I came to enjoy my time on my own and not talking to anyone except my best friends. I didn't have to worry about when I'd get a text back, or if I'd be left on read, or who he'd be out with since I wasn't around. The only thing I needed to worry about was my paychecks and tan lines.

Sometimes after breaking things off with someone who you put so much effort into, whether it was a boyfriend, an almost relationship, or even a friend with benefits, it's easy to want to show off on social media and make them regret ever hurting you or ending things. Why? It's a nice little ego boost, sure, but after those few seconds of glee from the fact that you know they've seen and maybe even liked your picture or your tweet, or saw your story on Snapchat, do you still feel happy? No, you go right back to feeling like crap, whether you want to admit it or not. Stop making yourself all about them when that ship has sailed and start being all about you.

Your ex is off doing their own thing, maybe thinking about you, but obviously not enough to want you back in their life the way you used to be. They are probably out there finding a new person to take your spot because they don't have you at their beck and call anymore. If they're also showing off to show you how much better they are without you or to make you jealous...why are you still following them or still participating in this sick little game for attention? Grow up and block them so you don't have to keep seeing their posts, or be adult enough to stop if you're doing the same as well. If it's only you posting, chances are you just look stupid, so stop before you really embarrass yourself. I was that person, and I know first hand how embarrassed I am for acting the way I did.

Summer is synonymous for doing whatever the hell you want. Wear what you want, say what you want, and be the best version of yourself that only a high dose of Vitamin D can bring out. Your ex is an ex for many reasons. You have to set aside the summer for you and what benefits you only. Don't concern yourself with an ex who doesn't care in the least about you anymore. Coming from someone who posted thirst traps aimed at a specific person along with countless shady AF stories on Snap and Insta in the hopes that this one person and their friends would see it, just stop and save yourself the energy as well as regret.

We're all adults, it's time to stop the petty posts and photos. Post your thirst trap for yourself because you're a sexy queen who doesn't need anyone but herself. Once you start focusing on yourself this summer, instead of your ex, you'll realize just have great it feels to truly be free.

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