According to Urban Dictionary, "the chase: one person's romantic pursuit of another, oftentimes not fueled by an actual desire for a relationship." But in reality, can be fueled for an actual desire of a relationship. I've been on both ends of the spectrum for wanting to have fun or actually settling down for a relationship.
The chase is seriously just a thrilling and fun (sometimes) experience which is why I feel like so many guys like it.
I was in a two-year relationship during my sophomore year to senior year in high school. I was young and never really experienced chasing. We broke up and it was like a whole new world for me. Being single was weird and I was thinking that I wasn't quite sure how to do it again. I put myself out into the world of singles eventually and everything was feeling normal again.
Men are known for the infamous chase. I've heard countless stories from my girlfriends about how they thought this guy was really into them and then when it actually started to get somewhat serious, he cut things off. I have also had similar experiences back when I was a freshman in high school, I'm pretty sure almost every girl has.
I started talking to some guys here and there, nothing too serious since I wasn't quite ready for a relationship but I was ready to get out there. I know how guys work, I was in the sport of wrestling for eight years of my life, which was an all boy team and have some amazing guy friends. They would tell me their problems or tell me stories about their lives with girls. Either they were trying to win her over to end up being in a relationship or they were simply just looking for a hookup. When my time came, I wasn't directly looking for anything and if things worked out with one guy and a relationship happens, then it happens. I was just riding along.
When I was getting to know some boys, I was keeping my mind open. I wasn't trying super hard to impress them or anything like that but I always wanted to keep them interested just in case I could see anything happening with them in the future. I started realizing that I was pretty much chasing these guys. There was a challenge of trying to keep them interested in talking to me because you know, girls love attention. I realized that I was chasing these guys... and I loved the thrill of it.
Once I started seeing that some of these guys really didn't care, I started acting like I didn't care and then it really hit them. I still wasn't really looking to settle down quite yet, so once a guy would seem like he wanted something more with me, I'd cut him out (which was probably a fuckboy move on my part... oops). The more and more I kept chasing, I became aware of why guys love to chase.
The adrenaline rush and the challenge was perfect because of how competitive I am as a person... until I met my now boyfriend.
He was definitely the biggest chase I've experienced. He was hot, funny and well liked. I felt like I couldn't even have a chance with him but I shot my shot anyway. As time passed, I pretty much noticed he was doing "the chase" with me as well. I got to know him more and more and I ended up falling for him and wanted more than just talking or a hookup. As two months passed of talking, hanging out and really getting to know each other, I knew I really wanted him. He was keeping his distance, making it seem like he was busy and whatever. The thrill of chasing ended up getting frustrating for me at this point, but I still loved the challenge and picked up my game. I started talking to him less and less which was basically letting him think that "I was losing interest in him."
We have been talking for about four months at this spot. He noticed it and I kept going on with it for about another week or two, soon enough he told me he liked me and asked me to be his girlfriend. The chase worked out in my favor!
Long story short ladies, guys aren't the only ones who can do "the chase." I did it, found out I love doing it because it was such a thrill and it ended up working out for me and I scored myself my current boyfriend.