Coming from someone who relies on girl time to get through the week, every week, I literally use it as an open forum to talk about anything and everything. One of us rants about a crappy grade, while another complains about a snooty girl who sits behind her in class.
Then it reaches another gal in the group, and everyone groans a little.
She's the one girl who CONSTANTLY talks about her man. My boyfriend did this and that and I haven't seen him in 20 minutes I miss him so much!! Everyone tuned her out at the first sound of my boyf-. It's really hard to stay in the same room as someone when you can't stand to listen to a word they say. We set aside time for letting our hair down, to decompress, to just enjoy the silence in some cases.
We are not here to listen to you talk about Chad, Brad or Chase.
None of us care anymore, and I'm not ashamed to say it. Every girl has her breaking point, and I'm dangerously close to reaching mine. I'm a little salty since I am single, but it's not really about that. It's about learning to talk about other things besides your boyfriend, or girlfriend, or whoever you're seeing. Talk about politics, or religion, or about the worst thing you've ever eaten in the dining hall. Talk about deep things. Talk about how much you miss your grandfather who passed, or how much you hope that your future children never have to go through some of the things you have. You and your boyfriend can go spend time together in your own little bubble, which I assume you already do most of the time anyway.
Newsflash: your girls will not stick around while you figure your priorities out.
They probably won't want to be your girls anymore. Yes, they know how happy you are, but there comes a time when your happiness doesn't matter anymore. They need to look out for themselves, and a friendship with you clearly isn't benefiting anyone.
Many girls can handle a relationship with her friends and her boyfriend perfectly well. Sometimes you forget she even has a boyfriend because she knows how to talk about other things. She knows how essential it is to have Wine Wednesdays or Friday's in her PJs with a bag of popcorn watching a horror movie with her girl squad. Yes, you can do these things with your boyfriend, but your girls won't want to join in. Yeah, you offer to be polite, but your offer is a waste of your breath.
Maybe, when I finally find my person, I'll get to see from the other side how it is. But I know myself well enough to know that no guy will ever get in the way of girl time. I've been there and done that, and I would not be who I am today without my girls both at home and at school. Friends are for life. We don't know if the guy were with now will be there in ten years, but your friends definitely will be.
Yes, be a good partner, but be a good friend to your friends. I'm not calling anyone out, so please do not take this personally, and if you do, sorry you feel that way. I'm just giving a PSA that girl time does not mean being with the girls and talking about your man. It means being present in that moment, because memories like that will last a lifetime, and you don't want to lose out due to someone who will likely be temporary in your life.