10 Qualities Guys Have That Girls Love That Have NOTHING To Do With Six-Packs Or Dad Bods

10 Qualities Guys Have That Girls Love That Have NOTHING To Do With Six-Packs Or Dad Bods

A breakdown of 10 qualities that actually matter and keep girls attracted to guys.
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Yes, physical appearance and initial attraction are what can spark interest and leave the first impression. What keeps a girl around are the things that go beyond surface level and is much deeper. Girls hope guys see past "butts and boobs" and "blondes or brunettes", and I'm sure guys hope we see past physical attributions that may sway initial attraction.

Real talk is that personality > looks, every damn time. Here are 10 qualities that matter more than how big his muscles are or how many beers he can throw back in one night.

1. Morals

If we see eye to eye on beliefs and issues that means more to me than anything else. it is also attractive when a guy has rules for themselves and takes action to stay true to them. I'm very much moral focused, and when a guy is the same way, it is very attractive.

2. Has good energy


Vibes are everything. If we hangout or meet out and the guy has a fun, light-hearted energy, there will most likely be immediate attraction. He doesn't have to be the life of the party, but I wouldn't be attracted to someone that is hiding in the corner glaring at everyone else having fun.

3. Can carry and show interest in conversations

Girls that love to talk, love guys that love to talk. Any girl will tell you it is attractive when guys show effort in conversation. Girls like me will not continue conversations that are one-word back and forth– no matter how much we want to talk. When guys contribute to conversations and keep them evolving, it's attractive– especially late at night when we want to have deep conversations.

4. Speaks kindly about other girls


If a guy is referring to other girls as biatches, sluts, or crazy, get the ef out. If a guy can't speak about other girls to us with respect, what would make us think he will speak about us with respect? Bad-talking girls is just an immediate red flag and unattractive. Girls want guys that can respectfully speak about other girls.

5. Takes care of himself


This is where working out vs. not working out comes into the conversation. Yes, if a guy is ripped, it is attractive; but, it is also attractive when a guy isn't ripped, but still makes an effort to take care of himself. Girls don't want guys to hold us up to unrealistic physical expectations, so we don't want to press those same expectations onto guys.

6. Keeps up with personal hygiene


I don't think I need to go deep into this one– it's pretty self-explanatory.

7. Has a good attitude


It is not attractive when a guy goes into situations with a "f•ck this" attitude. Girls appreciate it when guys show compassion, effort to keep an open mind, and a willingness to tackle obstacles without a constant complaining and cussing.

8. Perspective of Life


If we vibe on the same outlook on life– that's an immediate boost in attraction. It's cool when you can have deep conversations with someone about life and what your individual futures look like. I feel like guys can get freaked out during these conversations because they may think girls are thinking about their future together. But nah, we just are thinking about ourselves and where we want to be in life, chill.

9. Good sense of humor

This is one of the most important– in my opinion. GIRLS LOVE BOYS THAT WILL LAUGH WITH US. Whether it is laughing when we make a joke, him making jokes, or just messing around and laughing at dumb things– it is attractive.

10. Treats us well– just as we should treat them


The ultimate determinant of keeping attraction is how we are treated. We want to be treated with respect and want to feel like we are a priority and important. Girls don't want to be with someone that is hot-and-cold and plays games. Yes, we can still be attracted to players and a-holes, but what will keep us around is how well we are treated. Girls should treats guys with the same respect and how we want to be treated.


Cover Image Credit: NBC Universal

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

An Open Letter To The Girl In A Toxic Relationship Who Doesn't See The Signs To Let Go

"it took letting go to realize that I was holding onto nothing" -R.H Sin

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Dear you,

I hope you're doing well. I once thought I was too. I once thought that if he would just change, for me, everything would work. However, my sweet girl, you should not have to change people, you should not have to push people to be better, for you. You cannot help anyone, that does not want to help themselves.

In the movies, we learn to love a bad boy that needs changing. However, it isn't always your job to be boys saving grace. However, his shaming and emotional abuse is not just something you should put up with so that you can love him. That is not loving.

Love is not a constant competition of who could belittle the other one first. Love is not asking for a hug and being told no. Love does not make you feel stupid for bringing up things that hurt your feelings.

Love does not grow angry because you talk to your mom about your feelings. Love does not body shame. Love does not constantly change the passcode to their phone.

Love does not laugh when you find out they're unfaithful. Love does not tell you that you are not smart enough to accomplish anything. Love does not force their hand up your thigh when the words "no" slip out of your mouth.

Love is the warmth of a hand on your cheek when you get anxious. Love is getting your backpack out the car for you. Love is turning around when you need them. Love compromises.

Love is encouraging. Love is proud. Love is forgiving. Love sees you for who you are. Love knows you are worthy.

God is your Father and you are His daughter, so do not believe for one second that this abuse is the love you think you deserve.

Love will not always be easy. Love will be challenging and a constant prayer to not anger so quickly.

However, do not mix up challenging with the abuse. If you are losing the good pieces of yourself, then it isn't love. I know that you put a lot of time and effort into this relationship, but it is no good, you are holding on to someone whose heart is not in the right place to love you.

I connected with a poem from R. H. Sin, once I left my toxic relationship which reads, "it took letting go to realize that I was holding onto nothing."

Darling girl, you are so loved by so many people, do not let this relationship hold you back or make you feel less worthy than you are. I have always been the girl with her nose stuck up in the air smelling for smoke, to follow the trail to a burning house to find a boy that needed saving, but it is more than likely a boy that lit the fire in the first place and needs changing.

So, do not be me, be better. Be the girl that lights her own world on fire, for her work, for her family, for God. You are you and you are amazing, so do not fear being without him.

You will feel as if you have come up for air after drowning in an ocean that you had no idea you were swimming in.

The emotional abuse that this boy has put you through and maybe even physical abuse will leave you building walls around your heart. It will make other relationships hard, but you are so so strong.

You will meet someone that makes you so happy and feel so easy to love, you will never understand how you stuck around with the one that hurt you for so long.

You deserve to grow from this, and I promise you will.

Let go.

xoxo,

The girl who learned from a toxic relationship

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Being Far Away From My Boyfriend Actually Strengthened Our Relationship Instead Of Forcing It Apart

While we were apart, we became closer.

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Before I really start this article, I just want to say that my relationship isn't truly a long distance relationship. We are both college students at the same university eight months out of the year, but the other four months we live quite a distance apart. Even during those four months, we are only about 150 miles from each other as the bird flies, but really about three hours from each other.

Being in a relationship where I'm not able to see my boyfriend every day or even every week has been a real challenge. But it's been a good challenge. It hasn't been a challenge because I've felt unfaithful or fallen out of love with him in any way. It's challenging because I miss him. We both work jobs and our schedules aren't the same and oftentimes we aren't able to talk to each other unless it's early in the morning or late at night. There are times when all I want to do is talk to him and tell him about how my day went and get a big bear hug from him. Unfortunately, I'm not really able to do this.

I firmly believe that being apart from each other for days, weeks, or even months have brought us closer than we could've ever imagined. We knew that this would be difficult, and we knew that there would be bad days, but we decided to power through it. It has made each time that we are able to see each other so much more special and meaningful.

Seeing each other has become more of spending time with each other than just laying around on the couch playing around on our phones. It's become really getting to know each other better and catching up on all the things we had missed. It's become a time for us to simply be in each other's presence and enjoy being able to talk face to face without a phone in the middle of us. We go on more adventurous dates, we take more pictures, and I think we would both easily say that we fall more and more in love with each other after each opportunity we have to spend time together.

Spending time together is no longer a daily activity, but it has become a right to be earned through hard work and several paychecks as travel can become expensive. We no longer take opportunities to see each other for granted, and it has made us grow closer because we aren't able to spend time together often. We look forward to the days when we won't have to worry about being apart but know that this is only a stepping stone in our relationship.

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