8 Reasons Ron And Hermione’s Love Always Wins

8 Reasons Ron And Hermione’s Love Always Wins

If I've ranted about it once, I've ranted about it a thousand times: Ron and Hermione deserve each other.

Elli
Elli
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If Ron and Hermione are so great, why do people always say that Hermione deserves better? Did she really "settle" for Ron? I mean, there was an international Quidditch player trying to get with her once upon a time. Was Ron really the best she could do?

Yes, yes he was. Don't believe me? Read on, my friend.

1. Ron always defends her.

The movies kind of butchered this. There's that famous scene in Prisoner of Azkaban where Snape calls Hermione an insufferable know-it-all, and Ron leans over and whispers, "He's right, you know?" Pretty hard to make a case for them being together after that, right?

WRONG.

In the books, Ron didn't agree with Snape. In fact, he did the opposite. He very loudly said, "You asked a question, and she knows the answer! Why ask if you don't want to be told?" There was never a time in the books where Ron agreed with what Snape said about Hermione, actually. And though he certainly did his fair share of good-natured teasing, he never stood for anyone treating her badly. Remember how upset he was when Bellatrix was torturing her in Deathly Hallows? Yeah, we stan a real man.

2. They support each other.

Sure, the books are full of them arguing, but they're also full of them supporting each other's interests. Ron made fun of Hermione's S.P.E.W., but in the end, he was on board to help the house elves. Hermione showed up to Ron's Quidditch matches and cheered him on. They didn't have identical interests, and they sometimes didn't even like what the other did, but they supported each other anyway!

3. They're good friends already.

"Oh, but the only thing Hermione and Ron had in common was Harry!" I hear you say. I shake my head at that bold-faced lie. Ron and Hermione were as close of friends as they were Harry. Remember Prisoner of Azkaban, when they went to Hogsmeade together because Harry couldn't and had an absolutely wonderful time? And every time Harry is off doing his own thing, he always comes back to find them together, either studying or talking or playing a game. They didn't have to hang out when Harry wasn't around. They chose to because they genuinely liked each other as friends.

4. The movie didn't do them justice.

One of the biggest problems with the movies was how Hermione and Ron were portrayed. The movies stripped away a lot of Ron's personality and made him into the character for comic relief, while giving a lot of his iconic and redeeming lines and character traits to Hermione. In the books, Ron is the one who enlightens the other two about the wizarding world, knowing everything about the Ministry and Quidditch and a host of other things that Hermione wouldn't find out reading books. He's genuinely funny and smart (remember when he beat McGonagall's chess set in the Sorcerer's Stone? At the age of 11?) and self-sacrificing (remember when he sacrificed himself to that same chess set? At the age of 11??) and an all-around good guy. As I heard it said on a Tumblr post once, "Movie Ron is the person book Ron is afraid of being in his lowest moments."

5. They fight, but they always make up.

And honestly? That makes them a much healthier couple than a lot of YA pairings. No matter what, you're going to get into arguments with your SO. It's unavoidable. Ron and Hermione have long been down that road, and by now they know what's too far, and how to make up after fights. Those are super important life skills, especially for a long-term relationship.

6. A lot of Ron's issues stem from lack of self esteem.

Ron's haters always pick apart his flaws, without thinking about where those might come from. He has an enormous inferiority complex, and it's not hard to see why. The youngest son of five older brothers, the best friend of the Chosen One and a certified genius, Ron gets overshadowed all the time. He has trouble seeing the value in himself, and that's a big driving force for a lot of his actions throughout the series (like in Goblet of Fire, when he left Harry for a few months, or in Halfblood Prince, when he downgraded to Lavender Brown). He canonically struggles with feeling like he doesn't deserve Hermione, that she and Harry are better together and secretly love each other. And yet the fandom simply confirms all of that, without bothering to think why Ron might act and think this way. Speaking as someone with very huge self-esteem issues: not cool, man.

7. Hermione is also flawed!

The thing the movies left out about Hermione was that she was also flawed. She was critical, a bit too self-absorbed, and not super in tune with her emotions or those of the people around her. And honestly? That's so completely cool. An awesome female character who kicks booty and has flaws at the same time? I am so here for it.

It also shows that she's not "too good" for Ron. She's not the perfect goddess the movies make her out to be. She's just a very intelligent, driven, flawed girl who fell in love with the funniest and most caring guy she knew.

8. They're absolutely adorable in every way.

Does this even need any explanation?

Why was Hermione not "settling" when she got together with Ron? Because she loved him, and he loved her, and that's enough. They care about each other enough to work through their differences, and that's what makes any relationship really strong and special.

Elli
Elli

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

The Friend You Like Romantically Doesn't Owe You Anything

The friend-zone can be escaped, but not in the way you might want
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We've all heard the story of the "friend-zone." Boy is in love with his best friend, she dates all the wrong guys and fails to notice how perfect he is, then eventually realizes how wrong she was and they live happily ever after.

I used to think that the friend-zone was a myth that lonely men created to feel better about themselves. But then I got friend-zoned myself.

Yes, it sucked, but the second I realized I had feelings for a friend (that I knew had no such feelings for me), I decided to suppress the feelings. When that wasn't enough, I cut them off for a bit, then, slowly, I felt OK. I could communicate with them without having unwanted romantic feelings pop up. I had escaped the friend-zone.

Having gone through that, I had more sympathy for someone I had to friend-zone a little while later. I had been friends with this guy for a few months. I didn't have many college friends yet and I was really lonely, so having his company really meant a lot at the time.

This caused me to not be able to see what should have been clear: he had a crush on me. When I finally made the realization, I immediately let him know that I didn't feel that way about him. He said it was OK, but I could tell it wasn't.

We didn't talk at all over the summer and when we came back for the fall semester, he would barely look at me. I had started dating his friend, which caused an even bigger rift between us.

Though I understand where he's coming from, I was also really mad at him for a long time.

It was as if he was only nice to me because he wanted romance in return. But people are not vending machines. You can't put in your "nice guy" coins and expect love, sex, or whatever the hell it is you want in return.

It hurt me to know that he only wanted romance and once that was off the table, he no longer wanted anything to do with me.

But then I thought back to the friend that had friend-zoned me. Unrequited affections really suck, especially when they're for someone that you spend a lot of time with. But the key is to work to escape it.

Yes, liking someone you're friends with and them not liking you back is a real thing, but people tend to treat the friend-zone like this mythic hell dimension that can never be escaped. But you can escape. Just maybe not in the way you'd like to.

Now there are three ways you can escape the friend-zone:

The first option is to confess your feelings and try to win them over. Now, this isn't completely unheard of. I've had friends that have dated people who had previously friend-zoned them, but it's extremely rare and risky. You have to risk your entire friendship in order to do this. If it doesn't work out, it could strain the friendship or sometimes break it beyond repair.

You can also do what my ex-friend did and completely cut the person off. If you're being a love-zombie and only doing nice things for the friend because you expect romance in return, leaving the situation might be the most healthy decision for you. I understand now that my friend might have stopped talking to me out of self-preservation. But it still hurts the people involved.

The third and final option is to just get over it. It's harsh, but it's real. Why try something you know is going to fail and cause pain to both sides? Yes, getting over crushes can be really difficult, but getting a normal friendship back rather than being stuck a love-zombie for them is worth the pain.

Whichever one you choose, just remember this: Your friends do not owe you any romantic affection. The work you put into making them happy should just come out of the goodness of your own heart. If you expect romance in return, you're not being a good friend to them. If you really care about them, don't put that kind of pressure on them. They don't want a mindless love-zombie that does their bidding for the hope that they'll get a tiny love kernel out of it. They just want a friend.

Cover Image Credit: Unsplash

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We Should Never Settle For Anything Less Than Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s Incredible Love Story

"He was the first boy I ever knew who cared that I had a brain."

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CNN's documentary about Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, titled "RBG," premiered for the first time on TV September 2. While the compelling documentary about Ginsburg's history outlined her professional success and political influence as the second woman to serve on the Supreme Court, it also recounted a beautiful love story—a love story that exudes qualities all women should aim for.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg met her husband, Martin Ginsburg, on a blind date when they were both undergrads at Cornell in the 1950s. Their iconic romance played a major role in helping Ruth seize the opportunity to interview for SCOTUS, as well as providing her the support every mother deserves in navigating a demanding career, particularly during a time when that wasn't an option for the majority of women.

Although Ruth and Marty's relationship started decades ago, the hallmarks of their relationship are standards that, unfortunately, are still not completely available to women in binary relationships.

What can we, as women today, learn from Ruth and Marty about how to approach our own relationships? Here are some (to name a few).

A man should never stop you from pursuing the education or career you want

Ruth still attended law school and launched her career without Marty expecting that she needed to stay at home, cook and take care of the children (unlike most families at the time).

While relationships are important, it's equally as important to be capable of your own independence

"My mother told me to be a lady. And for her, that meant be your own person. Be independent." – RBG

The best kind of confidence: a man who is comfortable enough with himself to not feel threatened by you

"One of the sadnesses about the brilliant girls who attended Cornell is that they kind of suppressed how smart they were. But Marty was so confident of his own ability, so comfortable with himself, that he never regarded me as any kind of a threat." – RBG

A good boyfriend/fiancé/husband is one that will take care of you…

According to Lisa Beattie Frelinghuysen, Ruth's legal clerk, Martin would often stop by the chambers to "lure Ruth home for dinner" after a long and busy work day.

…And be willing to compromise for you

When the woman's movement came along, and Ruth's career became more important than ever, Marty put her career first and gave up his position at Georgetown after President Carter nominated Ruth to the U.S. Court of Appeals.

A man who cares about your intelligence is a keeper

"He was the first boy I ever knew who cared that I had a brain." – RBG

Parenting is a two-person job

In "RBG," Ruth explains that Marty was the main chef in the house because she was a horrible cook. Their daughter, Jane, explained that Marty was always "cooking for Mother even when he could not himself eat, nor stand in the kitchen without pain because for him it was ever a joy to discuss the law over dinner with Mother while ensuring that she ate well and with pleasure."

Find someone who will stick by your side and be your biggest cheerleader

Ruth wasn't one to boast about herself, so Martin did. In a time when women were scarce in the law community and faced many barriers, Marty was adamant that his wife was the woman for the job when the Supreme Court had an opening in 1993. He was the one who brought her to Clinton's attention.

Loving your best friend is the best kind of love there is

Martin Ginsburg passed away in 2010. His last letter to Ruth says it all:

6/17/10

My dearest Ruth—

You are the only person I have loved in my life, setting aside, a bit, parents and kids and their kids, and I have admired and loved you almost since the day we first met at Cornell some 56 years ago. What a treat it has been to watch you progress to the very top of the legal world!!

I will be in JH Medical Center until Friday, June 25, I believe, and between then and now I shall think hard on my remaining health and life, and whether on balance the time has come for me to tough it out or to take leave of life because the loss of quality now simply overwhelms. I hope you will support where I come out, but I understand you may not. I will not love you a jot less.

Marty

The number of beautiful characteristics of Ruth and Marty's relationship could go on and on, but this list is a good start. Ladies: hold yourself to these standards in your binary relationships. Never degrade yourself, dumb yourself down or hold yourself back in life just for the sake of a man.

If the guy you're with is truly a man, he'll elevate you, push you to achieve your dreams in life and be your biggest fan along the way… all while you do the same for him, too. Every woman deserves to love and be loved like this in her lifetime. Don't settle for less.

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