One of the biggest mistakes that young people make in their dating lives is believing that kissing is a one-way ticket to full-blown sex.
On the contrary, kissing is one of the most passionate and intimate acts that you and your partner could engage in. It shouldn't just be a prelude to hurry through so you can get to the main event. Kissing itself should be treated as the physical art form it truly is. And if you're looking to brush up on your lip-locking skills, see the guide below to transform your technique from mediocre to mind-blowing.
Here's how to be a better kisser:
1. Know your partner's preferences
If you're familiar with the person you're kissing, then you should also be familiar with how they like to be kissed. Are there particular moves that you know drive them wild? Definitely experiment the next time you're alone together and get to know how their bodies react to different sensations. Also, rather than fall into a boring routine, play with who gets the dominant role and who gets the submissive role. Or if you're feeling frisky, even battle for that "alpha position."
2. Be mindful of where you are
How you lock lips should not only match your partner's preferences, but should also depend on where you are and who you're with. There's a time and place for everything, so take in the mood of your surroundings—are you dancing in the middle of a crowded club, or are you having a quiet cup of coffee in a café? Save the waist-grabbing, lip-biting moves for a busier environment where you and your partner will feel less like a focal point. When your company and location is subdued, play it safe with a gentle caress of their lips as you rest your hand on their cheek. Your lover—and the people around you—will thank you.
3. Keep the tongue to a minimum
Chances are, your partner isn't looking to be licked in the mouth by the human equivalent of a Golden Retriever. So when you want to use your tongue, introduce it gradually as you kiss. You're stronger than you think—be careful not to drill your tongue down your partner's throat. Keep it soft and only slightly wet. Run just the tip of your tongue over your partner's bottom lip, or rub your tongue lightly against theirs if you're looking for a little more passion.
4. Tease, but not too much
Most everybody loves to be teased a little bit during a sexual encounter. It's a great builder of tension and keeps your partner eager to experience what's to come. But there comes a point where being too tentative and being too light just becomes a buzzkill that neither of you will enjoy. As a general rule, when it comes to kissing, it's all about keeping everything in moderation. So leaning in for a sensual kiss only pull back and letting your hand linger over their waistband while never actually touching them is only cute and playful for a while.
5. Use your eyes
Most of the time, we tend to kiss with our eyes shut, but why not ignite the spark between you and your lover with a little bit of pre-kiss eye contact? The eyes are the windows to the soul, and using your eyes to convey your emotions can be even sexier than using your voice. So right before your lips touch, gaze deeply into your partner's eyes, stroking their cheek with your fingertips or tucking their hair behind their ear. Then close your eyes and let the rest of your senses take over, which will be more heightened in the absence of sight and leave you feeling breathless.
6. Change up your position
Don't just stand still like a statue as you and your partner lock lips. Add some variety to your romance and consider how positioning yourselves differently could enhance how good the kissing feels. Try pinning your lover to the wall with their wrists above their head for a more dominant approach. Or lie them down gently on the couch or on your bed and move your body in rhythm against theirs. Lift them up on the kitchen counter or on the bathroom sink and have them wrap their legs around your waist. And with all of this, don't forget that clothing isn't always necessary…
7. Add a little sharpness
Lip-biting is seriously too hot to resist. You will have your partner buckling at the knees with just a little tug on their bottom lip in the middle of a kiss. Pull as hard as they appear to enjoy it, but not too hard! While enthusiasm is key to experiencing great romantic chemistry, nobody wants to come away from a kiss with a bloody lip. So have at it, but keep in mind that promoting pleasure—not pain (unless they're into it)—is your goal.
8. Kiss beyond the lips
Most people would much rather have their partner's lips stray from theirs to trail along different parts of their body than be kissed only on the lips. So once you're both good and in the mood, let your lips roam from their face to their ears, down their neck, or across their collarbones. Kiss down their spine as you give them a sensual massage. Tickle that area of skin between their belly button and their waistband with light, feathery kisses. Be as innocent or as naughty as the moment calls for.
Honestly, who wouldn't want to be better at kissing? It seriously feels amazing and, with the right person, it can be more sensual and intimate than you ever thought possible.