How To Make Your Intentions Clear On A Dating App If You Want More Than Just A Hookup

Dating apps can be as daunting as sky-diving for some people... while others simply see them as a means to a fast hookup, with no feelings attached to anything said or done.

If you're going into 2019 single, dating apps are probably something you've contemplated downloading or already have. Some of you may just be on them for the fast, easy hookup scene and all the power to you.

However, more often than not, many of us don't want something like that. We want to find something genuine. How is that even possible in this day and age where dating seems to be a thing of the past?

Here are the best strategies to attract only relationships on dating apps:

1. Don't put your Snapchat or Instagram in your bio

This is how people you definitely did not match with will try to contact you and bombard you with questions as to why you didn't match with them. These people are relentless, so it's better to just give out your Instagram or Snapchat to someone you matched with that you see potential in.

2. Speaking of your bio, try to refrain from adding anything that could bring about what you AREN'T looking for

AKA pickup lines or general statements with sexual innuendos. I would suggest putting some sort of funny line in there instead, like "send memes not dick pics" or mention a really cool feature about yourself to spark a conversation. A guy I recently started chatting with talked about how his eyes change color all the time, and that started a really awesome conversation. You can actually talk to someone about things other than sex, and it all results from both parties abilities to have genuine conversations. Your bio could be a great way to get those conversations going.

3. Choose photos of yourself that show an accurate representation of who you are

Want to show off your assets? Go for it, but don't make that the entire basis of photos that your potential matches are seeing, because they'll begin to make assumptions before they talk to the real you. Throw in pictures from your vacation in Spain or a group shot of you and your friends from Halloween. You should definitely include a photo of you with some sort of animal, whether it's your pet or a picture you snapped while at the zoo. I feel like a sexy pic paired with a bunch of pictures that show off your personality is a great balance.

Avoid having more than one picture of you with the opposite sex, because I know I find it very off-putting seeing a guy constantly in pictures with other girls.

4. If you think to yourself that this person looks like a douchebag, they probably are, so swipe left

I know we aren't supposed to judge a book by its cover, but I feel as though your gut can tell right away who's going to be a good match and who isn't. Some people just reek of snobbery, and just based off of their bio alone you can make a sound judgment that their desires on dating apps are the total opposite of yours. You know what you need in a person, and if they don't look like they will give that to you, swipe left and don't waste your time.

5. If you feel a conversation going south, don't force it

If you're struggling to keep a conversation going then just unmatch with the person, plain and simple. Are they only talking about sex? Do they respond with three words or less? Are they overall not what their pictures or bio made them out to be?

Cut. Them. Out.

Don't feel bad about it because they probably have countless other people they're talking to. Let's be honest. That's why, until you're both on the same page, you should keep your options open and your walls up.

6. Ask them what they're looking for sooner rather than later

This is something I should have done in past relationships and is something I am finally doing now that I'm getting back out there. I've found that a small handful of guys have asked me almost straight away what I'm looking for, which I respect. However, I think the conversation should be allowed to flow a bit longer before this question is dropped. Just because I may want a relationship doesn't mean I'll jump into one with someone because they want one too. You are allowed to be picky, but also try to be open to someone new who you may not usually go for. You're better off having this conversation sooner because it will save you from getting hurt in the end. Make what you want to be known and do not hold back.

The world of dating apps is at your fingertips, and I can only hope that you fight for the kind of relationship you want and deserve.

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

I Asked 11 Strong Independent College Girls Why They Plan On Staying Single Alllllll 2019

We don't all need a man to be happy.


Listen. Not every college girl wants a ring by spring or really even cares about finding a man. With the popularity of going to college just to walk out with a Mrs. Degree, all the confident and single ladies tend to get overlooked.

Well, ladies, in case you haven't caught on to 2019's biggest dating trend, I'll share it with you—it's loving yourself and staying single. Here what these 11 strong, independent, college girls say about their plans to stay single alllll 2019.

1. Boys are dumb. Simple as that.

"The male species literally is incapable of using their brain at 20-years-old, I'm going to wait until 30s so maybe they will know how to use their common sense. Sorry boys." - Shelby, 20

2. I want to grow on my own.

"I want to focus on learning more about myself and challenging myself. Also, relationships are complicated so I'd rather spend that time worrying about or focusing on school." - Molly, 18

3. Self-love is the best love.

"I need to learn to love myself more than I have been the past two years. I just got out of a two-year relationship (which I am still severely heartbroken over) but I am actually excited to be living life for me." - Caitlin, 20

4. The time spent on focusing on gaining someone else's love will now be spent on finding love within myself.

"It's not that I plan on staying single, I'm just not going to actively put myself out there and fine tune myself. I have spent the past couple of years doing everything I could to find a guy, dating apps, blind dates, letting my friends run my dating apps, socializing a little extra and it just makes me so tired. I want to focus more on myself and what I like to do. Take myself out for a nice dinner and spend time with me. Not watching Netflix but actually getting to know who I am and love myself again, because how you can expect somebody to love you and know you if you don't even know or love yourself?" - Leah, 23

5. Time for some power moves, sister.

"I'm achieving my career dreams without any man holding me back or making me second guess myself or my decisions!" - Jenny, 21

6. Someone print this on a damn t-shirt or something.

"I'm trying to get A's, not Baes." - Holly, 20

7. Well, to put it simply...

"Men are trash." - Bobette, 22

8. Your potential should not be defined by a relationship.

"I've found there's more to life then having a boyfriend. Right now, I'm transitioning from being a college student to my career and I think the last thing I need is to worry about starting a relationship. I'm going to focus on loving myself this year." - Sarah, 21

9. So much time has already been wasted...

"I plan on staying single because boys have been too much of a waste of my time already." - Erin, 21

10. What's the move in 2019? Self love. That's the move in 2019.

"For myself, honestly. I just want to focus on me." - Lex, 19

11. I'm the best me when I'm single.

"I just function better when I'm by myself. There's no extra stress and no need to please or impress anyone." - Jordyn, 20

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11 Thoughts Single College Girls Experience On Valentine's Day

All the mixed emotions single girls feel on Valentine's Day

Dr King
Dr King

Other than my junior year, any Valentine's Day that came across during my college years were filled with a wide range of emotions. Part of me was salty because I wanted the gifts and attention others were getting. Part of me was relieved that I didn't have to plan anything and could focus on classes the next day. Most of the time though Valentines Days were filled with anticipation for the "Fifty Shades of Grey" trilogy.

I've always wondered how my personal mixed emotions seemed to line up with the general population and research shows that it's complicated for many. Although singles aren't necessarily devastated by it, our thoughts about Valentines Day depend on many situational factors.

And if you're a single college girl, you may be thinking these 11 things on Valentine's Day:

1. “I wish I had a boyfriend just for the day.”

This is what some girls are thinking if they’ve been single for a while and they don’t necessarily miss being in a long-term relationship, but they just want completely undivided attention for the day and a romantic candlelight dinner.

2. “I’m glad I don’t have a boyfriend. I don’t need a man.”

This is what usually goes on through girl's heads if they're the independent type who don't place that much value on relationships. They might still scroll through Instagram out of pure nosiness, but if anything, they're probably thinking about how happy they are in the relationship they have with themselves.

3. “I wonder if he’ll send me a happy Valentine’s Day text...or maybe it’s too early for that.”

Valentines Day is already hyped up enough when you’re in a relationship and it’s to be expected that you probably won’t be doing anything romantic if you’re single on that day. But what about those who are in a situationship? Yes, it’s that awkward phase when an official title isn’t there, but that doesn’t mean Valentines Day can’t be brought up at all. Don’t you secretly hope that the person you’re involved with will at least send you a “Happy Valentines” text or stop by and give you a rose?

4. “Wait, they’re actually together?”

On Valentine's Day, the timeline on Instagram is similar to the Oprah Winfrey meme “You get a car! You get a car!" except it's with boyfriends instead. This girl has a boyfriend! *gasp* and this girl has a boyfriend too! *gasp*

5. “Wait...didn’t she just key his car and slash his tires after he hooked up with her best friend last week?”

This exact thought might be a tad bit of an overexaggeration, but it's still the most awkward thing when you see a picture of a couple looking as happy as can be, but deep down everyone knows that their relationship is nothing but drama behind closed doors.

6. “I’ll just hang out with my girl friends, eat pizza, and gossip.”

Girls who enjoy the company of their closest friends more than anyone else will most likely be thinking of hosting a Galentine's Day party rather than a Valentine's Day party. Besides, romantic love isn't the only love that exists.

7. “I’ll treat myself with chocolate.”

Let's be real. Valentine's Day is the perfect time to take a break from the diet and splurge on candy and chocolate.

8. “I’ll treat myself with wine.”

Other than candy and chocolate, wine would be the third option as a substitute for having someone special for Valentine’s Day.

9. “I can’t believe I got dumped.”

Believe it or not, the time of February is peak breakup time. A Facebook study showed that around the time of Valentine’s Day is usually when you’ll notice breakups start to happen in a more recurring manner.

10. “It’s literally no different than any other day.”

Then finally, there are the people who really don't give a damn about Valentine's Day at all because ultimately, it's just another day.

11. “Maybe this wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't dick deprived.”

Sometimes Valentine's Day doesn't have people thinking about intimacy and romance. Sometimes it's just a reminder of the sexual drought you've been going through for a while.

Dr King
Dr King

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