How To Make Your Intentions Clear On A Dating App If You Want More Than Just A Hookup

Dating apps can be as daunting as sky-diving for some people... while others simply see them as a means to a fast hookup, with no feelings attached to anything said or done.

If you're going into 2019 single, dating apps are probably something you've contemplated downloading or already have. Some of you may just be on them for the fast, easy hookup scene and all the power to you.

However, more often than not, many of us don't want something like that. We want to find something genuine. How is that even possible in this day and age where dating seems to be a thing of the past?

Here are the best strategies to attract only relationships on dating apps:

1. Don't put your Snapchat or Instagram in your bio

This is how people you definitely did not match with will try to contact you and bombard you with questions as to why you didn't match with them. These people are relentless, so it's better to just give out your Instagram or Snapchat to someone you matched with that you see potential in.

2. Speaking of your bio, try to refrain from adding anything that could bring about what you AREN'T looking for

AKA pickup lines or general statements with sexual innuendos. I would suggest putting some sort of funny line in there instead, like "send memes not dick pics" or mention a really cool feature about yourself to spark a conversation. A guy I recently started chatting with talked about how his eyes change color all the time, and that started a really awesome conversation. You can actually talk to someone about things other than sex, and it all results from both parties abilities to have genuine conversations. Your bio could be a great way to get those conversations going.

3. Choose photos of yourself that show an accurate representation of who you are

Want to show off your assets? Go for it, but don't make that the entire basis of photos that your potential matches are seeing, because they'll begin to make assumptions before they talk to the real you. Throw in pictures from your vacation in Spain or a group shot of you and your friends from Halloween. You should definitely include a photo of you with some sort of animal, whether it's your pet or a picture you snapped while at the zoo. I feel like a sexy pic paired with a bunch of pictures that show off your personality is a great balance.

Avoid having more than one picture of you with the opposite sex, because I know I find it very off-putting seeing a guy constantly in pictures with other girls.

4. If you think to yourself that this person looks like a douchebag, they probably are, so swipe left

I know we aren't supposed to judge a book by its cover, but I feel as though your gut can tell right away who's going to be a good match and who isn't. Some people just reek of snobbery, and just based off of their bio alone you can make a sound judgment that their desires on dating apps are the total opposite of yours. You know what you need in a person, and if they don't look like they will give that to you, swipe left and don't waste your time.

5. If you feel a conversation going south, don't force it

If you're struggling to keep a conversation going then just unmatch with the person, plain and simple. Are they only talking about sex? Do they respond with three words or less? Are they overall not what their pictures or bio made them out to be?

Cut. Them. Out.

Don't feel bad about it because they probably have countless other people they're talking to. Let's be honest. That's why, until you're both on the same page, you should keep your options open and your walls up.

6. Ask them what they're looking for sooner rather than later

This is something I should have done in past relationships and is something I am finally doing now that I'm getting back out there. I've found that a small handful of guys have asked me almost straight away what I'm looking for, which I respect. However, I think the conversation should be allowed to flow a bit longer before this question is dropped. Just because I may want a relationship doesn't mean I'll jump into one with someone because they want one too. You are allowed to be picky, but also try to be open to someone new who you may not usually go for. You're better off having this conversation sooner because it will save you from getting hurt in the end. Make what you want to be known and do not hold back.

The world of dating apps is at your fingertips, and I can only hope that you fight for the kind of relationship you want and deserve.

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

Sorry Boys, But I Won’t Be That Girl Who Waits Around For You Anymore

Just because I know my worth doesn't mean I should have to wait around for you to realize it too.


I'm like most girls. I am such a hopeless romantic when it comes to dating and all that jazz. With that being said, I have also been the type of girl who has waited around for that guy once or twice (OK let's be real, one too many times).

I am a nice person and a lot of my friends know that I have a kind heart. You can do me dirty and I will forgive you. When it came to guys they could have led me on or ghosted me and later on came back out of nowhere and apologized, more than likely I would have given them a second chance at redemption.

I waited around for that guy to either realize how great we would be together or realize how great of a girl I was. All of my friends would tell me how great I was and how worthy I was but in the end, they weren't the ones I wanted to hear that from. Which was why I waited around and thought up of an excuse to defend the guy I was waiting around for.

The older I got the more I realized how silly I was for waiting around for a guy who probably did not appreciate me the way I should have been appreciated. I realized that I was much better than that and I made a promise that I would stop waiting around. Of course, I did slip up here and there (I mean, I am only human after all).

It wasn't until I was beyond over the male species that I realize how ridiculous I was being for crying over someone who stopped talking to me without rhyme or reason. That was the moment that I realized how worthy I was of a great relationship. A relationship that you see in movies or see in old couples who have been married for 65 years.

I decided I was no longer going to be THAT girl who waited around for a guy. I was no longer going to defend him when my friends asked me why I was still talking to him. I was no longer going to wait around for him to realize how worthy I was. Ever since I promised myself that I was going to live MY best life I have been beyond happy.

Yeah sometimes I say to myself "he was different" but then I remind myself that if he truly cared for me the way I cared for him then I would not have to wait around. He would not only pursue me but also my heart.

So ladies, realize your worth. Stop waiting around for that guy to come to the conclusion how amazing you are. You are a queen and if he can't see that right off the bat, he is NOT worth your time. Wear your crown with your head held high, live your best life, and slay the day away, queen.


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You’re Not Going To Meet Someone On Your Couch Watching Netflix, So Get Your Ass Up

Dating isn't easy, but getting off the couch shouldn't be too hard.


I don't mean to come off as harsh.

The words are directed at me just as much as they are anyone else. Dating isn't easy, especially when most of us have been out of practice. Even as an extroverted person, the idea of striking up a conversation with an attractive guy makes me anxious. If you are fine with being single then this article isn't for you but for the rest of us who want to change our stagnant relationship status, keep on reading.

Dating has changed drastically since our parents' days. In-person conversations have shifted to words on screens, while dinners and drive-in movie theaters have turned into "Netflix and chill." While some of us might be OK with these casual meetings, others want to be wooed. No matter what kind of relationship you're looking for, I can tell you that you aren't going to find it while laying on your couch. Starting something new is stressful and nerve-wracking, but you have to start somewhere. Sometimes we need to get out of our comfort zones in order to put ourselves in a situation to meet someone new. Whether it's a house party, a nice night out with your girls, or maybe even an invite to study with a new group of friends, these all have the possibility of you putting yourself out there.

There is the potential to meet someone new anywhere: the library, the grocery store, or even in class. While it's important to put yourself out there, don't put so much pressure on everyone you meet. Some people are meant to just be friends, while others have the possibility to be so much more. If you try and it doesn't work out with one person, don't beat yourself up — maybe it wasn't meant to be, or the timing just wasn't right. All I'm trying to say is that you will never know what's out there if you don't get off the couch. I've had a lot of heartbreak in my life and sometimes I think that stops me from trying something new. It's hard to come to terms with that you might be what's stopping you from having a relationship with somebody. We need to remind ourselves that we deserve to be loved and be happy, and a healthy romantic relationship can give us that, we just have to be willing to try.

So strike up a conversation with the cute guy in your English class. Text the boy who you've always wondered "what if." Flirt with the guy who you make eye contact with across the bar. Or don't. The choice is yours. Sitting on the couch hasn't been working for you though, so you might as well try something new.

If you're truly content with being single, I'm happy for you. Keep watching Netflix on your couch, don't let me stop you. But for everyone else who wants to change their relationship status, pause the show, close the laptop or turn off the TV. Try something new, even though it's scary. I'm not saying a boyfriend will just fall into your lap, but it certainly doesn't hurt to try.

Someone could be out there waiting for you, all you have to do is get off the damn couch.

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