I Never Wanted A Wedding, But I Changed My Mind, Here's Why
Start writing a post
Swoon

I Never Wanted A Wedding, But In The End, I Fell In Love With Our Unforgettable Day For These 6 Reasons

At first, I anxiously dreamed of escaping my wedding and eloping. In the end, I came to love every bit of our unrepeatable day.

252
I Never Wanted A Wedding, But In The End, I Fell In Love With Our Unforgettable Day For These 6 Reasons
Photo: Anete Rūķe

I remember the day of my proposal very clearly. It was a sunny September morning, and my then-boyfriend surprised me out of nowhere on our vacation by dropping to one knee and popping the question right then and there in our cozy Airbnb apartment in the heart of Berlin.

I wish I could say I started planning the wedding right then and there, as many enthusiastic brides-to-be would do. But I'd be lying, big time.

The truth is, I didn't want to make a big fuss out of our wedding. No big church, no fancy meals, no flower arrangements, I said. I dreaded the planning, and I didn't know where to start.

Some days, I anxiously dreamed of escaping everything and eloping, just the two of us.

Fast forward to my wedding day, there I was - standing in the middle of the beautiful medieval church in our hometown, dressed in a white lace dress, nervously clutching a bouquet of beige roses and my new husband's hand.

Somehow, I'd made it to my wedding, and it was way bigger than I expected. And surprisingly - I was glad!

In the process of preparing for our special day, I'd somehow found the excitement for celebrating our wedding and found a deeper meaning to the whole process.

In the end, I came to love every bit of that unrepeatable day.

1. It's the perfect time for both families to meet

Somewhere along the process of preparing the wedding, my mom said to me in a preaching, serious voice: your wedding will be the first time both sides of the family, yours and your future husband's, meet. Like a bridge that connects two shores.

I thought to myself, "nonsense! It's not like they're complete strangers."

But as I started contemplating it, I had no other choice than to agree with her. Some of our relatives came from further away in the country, and many of them didn't even know each others' names.

It was us, the couple in the middle of the whole wedding hoopla, who'd met everyone. Our relatives, however, hadn't bonded with each other, and this was the perfect occasion for them to do so.

2. Reconnecting with friends

My wedding was one of those turning points when I realized how much I love my friends and, surprisingly, how much they love me.

Our friends selflessly offered to help with everything and anytime. By doing so, they conveyed a sense that our wedding was not only important to us, but it was really important to them, too.

"Need any help with the flowers? Should I talk to your mom about why that third-degree relative is not invited? Are you getting nervous? We can go out for a drink and talk anytime you need!"

This level of sincerity felt somewhat unreal to me. Generally, I'm a person who goes through life selfishly thinking I don't need anybody else and that I can do everything on my own.

This time, I let go of the urge to be in absolute control and used our wedding as a chance to be enwrapped in love and friendship.

3. Bonding with parents

Seeing your children walk down the aisle can be especially emotional, even for cool-headed parents who never shed a tear.

And who can blame them? After all, weddings mark the departure of a child when they enter adulthood and start their own family, as their primary loyalty will now be to their spouse.

So, use this special time to bond with your parents and in-laws. Find out what their own weddings were like, and how their life changed afterward. Spend as much time as you can with them because later it will be work, duty, and "the adult life".

For example, even though I wasn't planning on getting a big white wedding dress, I spent a whole day with my mom looking and trying on the especially puffy ones just for the fun of it. And even despite a big fight, we had at the end of trying on dresses, this day with her turned into one of the dearest memories from the whole wedding.

4. Present time!

Don't get me wrong, I don't think the main purpose of a wedding is to receive presents. Not at all.

But I do believe that besides gifting you and your significant other their time, your friends and family will also want to get you something to remember them by.

It's okay to give hints about what wedding gifts you'd like to get. We'd politely asked our guests to gift us cash to contribute to our honeymoon fund. But my all-time favorite gift came from my colleagues who got us comfy couple's clothing with secret openings to encourage hugs and cuddling on a daily basis. Cute, yet practical!

5. All eyes on you

I couldn't say I particularly enjoy being in the center of attention. In fact, when it comes to social events, I prefer the smaller ones without any crowds where you can easily slip away unnoticed.

However, during my wedding, I enjoyed every bit of attention my husband and I received that day. Because this level of happiness doesn't happen often on a daily basis, and I felt like sharing it with the whole world.

And so I waved happily to the group of Asian tourists who stopped and watched us get out of the car in front of the church, taking photos of our ecstatic faces.

I smiled at the kids passing us on the street, saying to us "this must be the best wedding ever!". Because to me, it really did feel like the best wedding, and the happiest day of my life, at least, up until that point in my life.

6. Good vibes only

It might be because of the great, Italian summer-like weather or because everything went exactly as we'd planned that I felt our wedding was filled with positive vibes only.

Or it might be that I got to see all the dearest and nearest, hug them, sing and dance with them, talk to them in one single day.

Whichever way, in that aspect our wedding did feel like a fairy tale - because I don't ever remember another day in my life when I've felt that pure level of happiness 24/7.

Final words

The thing about weddings is that most likely, it will be a very joyous day with lots of laughs and happy tears. Your marriage, on the other hand, will have its ups and downs, challenges and plenty of times when you'll just want to give up - and that's fine, too.

That's why I came to think about our wedding as a motivational benchmark, to start our path off on the right foot.

And as the saying goes, if on your wedding day, you look to the side and you're excited to spend the rest of your life with the person you see there, odds are - you're in for a long and fulfilling ride.

Report this Content
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

40199
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

24809
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

950559
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

131201
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments