It seems like everywhere I look, couples are swarming around campus. Literally, the minute I walk outside my room I am hit with girls giggling over something a guy said or PDA being extremely overused. The worst part? I used to be that girl.

I was the girl who was so dependent on her boyfriend that she did everything with him. Whether that be grocery shopping or homework, we were inseparable. He was my best friend for a long time and for the longest time my only friend. What happened when we broke up? I felt completely, and utterly alone.

For a long time I kept to myself, but after a couple of weeks, I started to realize I was going to need my friends if I was going to get through this. Friendships that had been put on the backburner for the last year were rekindled, and when they say that your friends are the most important thing in your life it’s true.

Without the amazing women I had, no questions asked, picking up the phone in the middle of the night when I was crying I would not be as strong as I am today. It is because of them that I am stronger and more independent than I had been in the past.

These friends reminded me of two very important things that in the back of my mind I knew, but needed to hear. The first: God loves you, and will never leave you. After feeling the amount of rejection that follows a break-up, this is something that I took close to heart. The second: You do not need a man to show how much of a badass you are. You can do that on your own.

I made a promise to myself there and then that I would be the best version of myself. I would do things that I enjoy and give my all in the things I love and hold dear. Since the breakup, I started working at a job that brings me so much joy I did not know it was possible, writing for two online magazines, and have met numerous people who have changed the way I look at the world.

I think a big part of growing up is doing things for yourself. Knowing what is best for YOU, and not having to answer to another person. Coming out of my last relationship I realized that being so dependent on a man caused me to lose myself in the process. Now, I am a woman I am proud of, and when the days get lonely I remind myself that I am a badass all on my own.

I hope those of you are in a relationship remember who you are. I hope you do no lose the girl you are meant to become because she is greater than any relationship can offer. Do not give up your dreams for his.

I felt so lost after my last relationship because I did not know who I was. I was so dependent on him that over the course of a year I became so unaware of the talents and abilities I had.

I did everything with and for him, and after healing from the heartache I learned something that I will never forget: “You are your biggest cheerleader, and best friend. Look out for your heart because no one else is going to.”

I am proud to say I am now a girl who strives off being strong. I have found a love and passion for writing that I had not explored in my past. It was through being dependent that I learned to be independent. I will never regret the girl I was six months ago, but I am so much happier with the woman I have become.