We get comfortable in relationships.
This is not such a bad thing.
They've become your second half. They are the person you just feel complete around. Love is crazy like that. Yet, we often forget what got us into the relationship to start with. We forget the little things that mean the absolute most. There was some chasing, some laughs, some deep conversations, some flirting.
Those are the things that made that spark fly.
Now look at the both of you.
That spark became a fire and bam, all the sudden there is no one else in the world you would rather be with. Like any fire, it will die if you don't keep it going with everything that started it. All those deep conversations, the laughs, the random flowers and dates, everything, ignited that fire. Keep the fire going.
Don't stop these things, as they are the things that started everything.
1. Don't stop flirting.
Oh the flirting. It was probably the both of you doing it. It was complementing the "work hair" after a very long shift. It was being a slightly sarcastic asshole that couldn't help but make them smile. Anything just to see them smile. It was telling them maybe what they wanted to hear or teasing them just a bit. Whatever your method of flirting was, keep it going.
2. Don't stop surprising.
Surprise! It's flowers. It's "I'm taking you on a date". It's bringing them coffee during work. It's a gift they heard you wanted. It's showing up. You have the memories of the little surprises that just lit up your day. It could be so minuscule to others, but to them it meant effort. It meant you cared.
Sometimes we don't realize how predictable we can become. That is how a spark gets lost. Surprise eachother (yes, both ends of the relationship!).
3. Don't stop random "I love you" 's.
Remember when you first said those words? You both had that mutual "holy shit...I'm falling" feeling. Saying those words just felt right. Sometimes, I love you's just become a habit. While there is nothing wrong with that, we have to remember to say it a little more often. Say it after you laughed for a solid five minutes after they've done something funny. Say it when they make you proud. Don't shrug it off. Although it is a "given", say it.
4. Don't stop checking in.
Ask how their day was. Check in after a long week. Check in after something challenging. Don't let them think you've forgotten or just don't care anymore. In the beginning, you probably always asked. Don't stop that. They need that.
5. Don't stop chasing
You remember the chase. It was probably combined with flirting, asking them out, asking about them, trying anything to get them to be yours. Success! They're yours and have been for a little while now. So now what? You don't have to try anymore? Keep chasing. Keep wanting more and more of them and chase for it.
6. Don't stop showing them off.
Be proud of what you have. They don't have to be with you every second or be every Instagram post or Snapchat. But, take a few to show them you aren't afraid to let anyone know they are yours. Show them you care and want only them. Show them what ya got!
7. Don't stop compliments, as if they are everything you ever wanted.
It's a "given". They know you're attracted to them, right? Yea, they do. But validation is still a necessity. Sometimes we just know they are handsome or gorgeous and everything you wanted. After awhile, when nothing is said, thoughts start flooding. Keep complimenting them; their new clothes, the way they look, the way they act, the way they walk out of the door and you feel like the luckiest person in the world. Tell them that, no matter how long you have been dating.
8. Don't stop getting to know each other.
Maybe you've dated for years or maybe you've dated for weeks. You think you know everything. You don't. Flat out, you do not. Get to know them each and every day. Their quirks, their favorite things, the best way to calm them down, their flaws and their perfections. Don't stop learning.
9. Don't stop xo's.
If relationships had a logo, it would probably be hugs and kisses (xoxo). You don't know the last time you're going to see them. That's the way this cruel world works. You never know...and it happens. Hold them tight, give an extra kiss. We can't control fate, but we can control this.
10. Don't stop late night conversations.
Remember your first last night conversations? Maybe you were a bit more giggly or maybe a bit more sentimental. Whatever it was, you felt closer. Like school-children best friends at their first sleepover, you were able to just be yourself. Keep growing closer.
11. Don't stop random date nights.
Date nights are a needed part of every relationship. You need that time together. It can be anywhere and you don't have to spend a dime. Grab their hand and go!
12. Don't stop talking.
Going along with #10, talk. Dear Lord, TALK! We get so immersed in our phones and screens we forget what is a foot in front of us. Talk. Talk when you're upset, let them know what is on your mind. You are both not mind readers (if you are, please contact me). Talk to each other. That person, the person you love so dearly rather, is your best friend. They want to know what you're thinking. Don't stop letting them know what is on your mind. Communication is everything in a relationship. It's the cornerstone of your relationship!
13. Don't stop showing them how much they mean to you.
This is another one of those "givens". They obviously mean the world to you. Yet, sometimes we forget to show it. We just assume. Show them, in your own little way, how much they truly mean to you. You did it in the beginning; don't stop now.
14. Don't stop loving every part of them.
Unless they are changing for the worse, don't forget to keep loving them. Tummies get a little bigger, they get a little more tired, they grow. Love them, every part of them. Going along with many of the other points, tell them that you still (and always will) love every piece of them.
15. Don't stop being their biggest cheerleader.
They did something...amazing. They accomplished something. They worked for something. They received everything they wanted and you are who they look to. Be that for them. Don't stop telling them how proud of them you are. Don't stop cheering them on, even when things get tough.
16. Don't stop being there.
In the beginning, you probably listened to problems very intently. You were there, whether it was a bad day, a bad year, a fight, or an issue. You were there. Don't replace that with head nods and "aw" 's. Talk them through it, let them vent. Just pay attention when they do.
17. Don't stop.
Keep trying. Sometimes, we give up too easily. Fight for what you want . Fight for what you deserve. Chase, flirt, cheer, love, talk, hug, kiss, all of that and more. If you think you can make it work, WORK on it.