How It Feels To Have A Long Term Friends With Benefits
Start writing a post
Swoon

If You've Had The Same F*ck Buddy For A Long Time, These 11 Feelings Will Seem Way Too Familiar To You

Isn't having a FWB supposed to be messy?!

Sarah Lane
Sep 14, 2018
Ball State University
463
https://www.pexels.com/photo/adult-affection-bed-closeness-414032/
Pexels

Having a friend with benefits is the staple of college relationships. Commitment is something a lot of college kids run away with fear from, but having someone who will always be there when you're down for a night on the sheets is a necessity.

For a lot of people, having a friend with benefits falls apart within a few months. Someone catches feelings, someone wants something more than the other, or things just all-in-all get really damn messy. This means the situation the two of you are in ends a lot quicker than you probably thought.

But for some of us, having a friend with benefits doesn't get messy, and can actually last a really long time. For anyone out there who has had the same FWB for a year (or two, like someone I know...), these feelings are some I'm sure you've felt time and time again.

1. Having someone who is always to hook up is the BEST.

I don't have to spend a bunch of time swiping on Tinder and awkwardly having conversations with only one purpose. All I have to do is send a couple texts and next thing you know he's over.

2. We've known each other for so long I could literally write a book about him, but yet I'm also 100% not taking him home for Thanksgiving.

We've been hanging out for so long and having random conversations about our life that I know where he's going to be working when he graduates, stuff about his family, and his favorite character from "The Office." But would I let him come to Thanksgiving dinner? Hell. No.

3. Constantly wondering how much different things would be if the two of you started dating.

Just a label, probably.

4. My neighbors have seen him over so often they probably think we are dating...

Having the same guy over every Friday and Saturday means every stranger in the nearby apartment is just going to go ahead and assume he's your boyfriend.

5. What is it like to have sex with someone other than them?

After having sex with the same person for so long, you begin to forget what it's like to hook up with different people. Which can be a good thing YES, but can also be kinda weird.

6. Aren't friends with benefits supposed to be messy?

Literally everyone told me to avoid getting an FWB at all costs because it'd be super messy and I'd catch feelings only to be let down. I like to think they were kind of wrong, because my relationship with my long-term friend with benefits is the farthest thing from messy. It's really amazing, actually.

7. When grandma asks me if I'm talking to any boys, do I tell her about him or no?

Is what we're doing worth noting to grandma at the dinner table because I'm gonna guess probably not...

8. We never actually put a label on our relationship, so what actually are we?!

We never officially said we're friends with benefits, so what exactly is our relationship? I guess this is the part where stuff can get messy...

9. Are they hooking up with anyone else?

Because we never put a label on things, we also never became exclusive. This means for all I know they could be spend their Thursday nights at some girl named Rachel's apartment doing the same thing we do at least once a week. It's an odd thought.

10. Do they think there's a potential for more between us?

Once again, this is where I can see things getting kind of messy, especially if we're not on the same page.

11. Should I hope for more between us?

After hooking up for two years and getting to know each other pretty damn well, I'm going to go ahead and assume if there was any hope for the two of us to be something more, it would've already happened.

From Your Site Articles
Related Articles Around the Web
Report this Content
Student Life

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned.

Siena College
10225
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
small towns
Relationships

Grateful Beyond Words: A Letter to My Inspiration

I have never been so thankful to know you.

University of New Haven
284664
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Smith College
85662
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
waitlisted
Swoon

Navigating the Talking Stage: 21 Essential Questions to Ask for Connection

It's mandatory to have these conversations.

National Writers Society
148428
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
single life
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

Marist College
51559
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less

Trending Topics

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments