I Asked 13 People In Different Stages Of Life What Love Is

I Asked 13 People In Different Stages Of Life What Love Is

The community has spoken.

What is love? We all have a different understanding of what it is. My definition than yours and that does not mean that yours is more valid than mine.In these trying times, it is very difficult to keep positivity in the world. There is so much hate, so much frustration that sometimes we need to take a step back and enjoy each other and all the good things that are happening around us.

It is 2018 and yet I still feel like we are not where we want to be. There is still insane violence in the world, we are not truly accepting one another and we are turning on each other. America is considered to be a huge leader in the world but we struggle in some of the basics of making our country strive and it starts with our people and us feeling heard.

I wanted to find out about others’ positive thoughts and vibes; So, I spent the past couple of days trying to collect answers of what people would define love being. They are all different ages, in different times in their lives, both in a relationship and single. Here is what we came up with:

1. “What is love? Its give and take and a little heartbreak. Also not being able to imagine yourself with anyone else the same way.”

2. “Fargle” When asked what that even means, the answer was, “it's a word my boyfriend and I came up with one night. We came to the conclusion that ‘love’ was not a strong enough word so we came up with our own word for love and that word is ‘fargle’. It is own little thing."

3. Love in general- “Love is understanding, patience, and honesty.” Romantic Love- “Letting your partner be exactly who they are, and accepting that they are not you. Loving them for everything, every imperfect, quirky thing they might do. Love is the memories you create and the experiences you have together.”

4. “When my elder son was 5-6 years old, I read him some of Shakespeare's sonnets. About an hour after we finished, he came up to me and said, ‘I know what love is. Love is kinda like a shooting star that helps everybody get back to normal.’ I’ve always liked that, not just the idea that love is a shooting star, but that the state of loving / being loved is our normal state...so when we do not have love, life gets problematic.”

5. “Love is when your friend knows that you don’t have time to get food between classes and so they bring you some. It’s the little things like that that remind me I’m loved.”

6. “What is love?: I think love is being able to tell someone how much you truly care about them and how much you love them. Also, being able to trust them with your whole heart. Love is also being able to share how your day was and how it could be better. Love is also being able to be open and honest with your significant other about how you feel.”

7. “Divorce is pathetic. Love takes time, not 1 night, not at 1st sight (or bite!). What is love? It’s when you’d be nothing without him/her”

8. “Love is choice. To be in love with someone you have to keep choosing them, and decide to be in love with them everyday you can. This sounds really easy but its not. The day you wake up and realize you don’t choose them over the hardships and distance and over potential partners, that’s when you know its convenience, not love.”

9. "Love is a feeling, an emotion that I think everyone should experience whether it's through friends, family or a person. It’s a passion. Something that gives you the will and motivation to keep going. Love is an inspiration."

10. "True love is the willingness to put another life in front of your own. For you to adapt and change yourself to better the life of someone else, regardless of these sentiments are returned or not."

11. "Love is biting your significant other when he wants attention."

12. "Love is a deep and understanding friendship between people, it involves laughter and pain, no matter what the case may be."

13. “Love is having their problems become yours and vice versa. It is late night calls when you feel scared. Sending funny messages to each other when the other is feeling down. Going to each other's concerts or sporting events even if you do not like orchestra concerts or basketball. You are there for them. Love is that they are not ashamed to speak up for you or they are not afraid to get into a fight with you. You are strong alone, but you are stronger together. It’s blissful nights of complete silence in their presence, but it is also passionate emotions that gets your gears grinding.”

I am not saying that love is the solo solution for everything going wrong in the world. It takes, fighting, grit, some tears and a lot of patience. Our country is losing patience though and I am afraid that we are staring in the eye of a tremendous storm that will go down in history and the textbooks for a while. But with all the stress, heartbreak, challenges and crowd cries, I want to keep hope and keep my faith close. I am not the most political person, ask anyone, but I do know when to acknowledge that people are hurting and hopeful they will fond some light as well.

Cover Image Credit: Deb Greengold

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

To The Woman Who Needs To Be Wanted, Don’t Let Men Be Your Vice

It will only make you begin to despise yourself.
Cai Parks
Cai Parks

By definition, a vice is a habitual or trivial defect... a shortcoming. Everyone has a vice.

Mine was men.

I always felt abandoned by the men in my life. I always clung to the opinions and attention of the boys around me...fighting for it in any way I could.

When I was younger, it was easy to get the attention of the boys my age by just dressing cute and having a bubbly personality.

As I got older though, I noticed that I was having to work harder and harder for their attention. Eventually, it turned into me feeling like I had to give myself to them in any way they asked to get their attention.

So that’s what I did.

I used my body as a way to fill some kind of void that I thought could be filled with the love of a man.

As the years went on, I felt myself clinging to not their love, but their lust.

I no longer cared about their love.

I just wanted to hear them call me hot, sexy, or beautiful. I knew they were using me.

I didn’t care.

I needed them to want me.

I needed them to beg.

I needed to feel needed.

For any woman who might feel as though a man’s lust for you can fill that deep void in your heart, take a step back. Trivial, temporary things like that will only make your heart heavier.

It will only make you begin to despise yourself.

There’s nothing wrong with living life the way you want or with who you want, but don’t use that lifestyle simply as a way to make you feel wanted.

Because my Prince Charming came into my life and I no longer needed any other man.

I finally felt truly loved and he helped me to learn that even without him, I would be more than a body.

He helped me see that I was a body, face, brain, smile, laugh, personality, and everything in between.

I am a strong woman now that I know my worth.

You are a strong woman.

Show your strength.

Know your worth.

Cover Image Credit: @thersagrant/Instagram
Cai Parks
Cai Parks

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Everything You Should Know Before Dating A Fitness Instructor

Sex, weights, cheat meal dates.


As a fitness trainer, I know how much we love our job. How much we love the people we help and encourage. How much we never want to stop doing what we do. Yet, it's not all sunshine and rainbows. My boyfriend has to put up with some things that probably, kinda sorta are unconventional. But, he's living his dream (his words).

No matter what they teach, personal training, yoga, pilates, barre, HIIT, I could go on and on, but either way, they are passionate about the people they work with. This fire follows them throughout their life and will most definitely influence you.

1. Constant practicing

Don't be alarmed if you wake up to find her up and about practicing her routines for a class/client.

2. Gushing about a client who has been killing it 

No matter how much of a tough cookie we are, clients touch our hearts.

3. She's flexible

You. Are. Welcome. My best friends always introduce me to guys with, "She's really flexible ;)"

4. There's a routine, stick to it

We may be flexible, but don't come between her and her schedule. She is supported by her routine.

5. You are now a fitness class guinea pig

She needs you to help her rehearse. Approach her practice tests with enthusiasm and just have fun.

6. She'll never judge you

Don't ever feel pressured or intimidated. We love you for you. And, news flash, we are not perfect.

7. Always learning

Learning never ends. Learning new routines, learning new people, learning new emotions, learning new approaches to life.

8. And always eating

Teaching a few classes a day is tough on the body. We need our snacks. All. The. Time.

9. Stretches before bed... every night

No matter how tiring and long the day was, she will make sure to fit it a quick bend and no break.

10. The funny things that happened during class

Story time: One time I taught and my pants ripped. Only made the class more fun!

11. Shaker bottle vases

There's no need for vases, when shaker bottles do you justice. The first time my boyfriend brought home roses, I didn't have a vase so we improvised and used a shaker bottle. Now, that's the only vase we will ever need.

12. Free personal training

It's your dream come true. Fitness is at your right hand at all times. Plus, we will be pumped to start talking to you about our passion.

13. She talks endlessly about how well/not well your class went

Sometimes we kill it and sometimes... we fall a little short.

14.  Chugging water

We need to stay hydrated! Plus, she'll be your water tracker as she bugs you to drink with her. Shots! Shots! Shots (of water)!

15. Team work makes the dream work

There is no "I" in team and fitness instructors know the strength of collaboration and support. No one can go through journey a journey alone.

16. She wakes you up early to go on a run

Let's take a jog to the beach and watch the sunrise!

17. Protein, protein, and more protein

She doesn't have to be a weight lifter to assure that she nourishes her body with enough protein (from any source you prefer). My cupboard is always stocked with lentils and chickpeas.

18. Watching her watch fitness videos to get ideas

While you're reading the news, scrolling through Instagram, or just chilling out, she'll be watching workout videos or saving posts from fitness accounts.

19. Goes to bed super early

We need at least eight hours of beauty sleep and, let's be real, we are grandpas.

20.  She lives off of Spotify playlists

Wait, do you hear that song? What's it called, I need to add it to my workout playlist. Plus, she loves to sing (even if she isn't that good).

21.  Pulse 2, 3, 4

While she does chores, she'll start reciting her catchphrases and mantras.

22.  She's your forever cheerleader

Getting out of bed? If you don't squeeze it, no one else will! Washing the dishes? Let's go, you've got this! Running to the bathroom? One more minute! 30 more seconds! Mowing the lawn? You better feel it tomorrow!

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