I Deserve The World, Until I Find Someone Who Gives It To Me, I'm Focusing On Myself
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I have been told by so many people in my life that unless you take time to yourself, you won't find any lasting relationships. Seems simple enough. Just focus on doing me, and then I'll find a good guy. I have tried, and lately, I've been getting the shit end of the stick when it comes to guys.

I've been crying my eyes out over guys who ghost me like I don't matter and never did, and the thought that they saw me as so easily replaceable breaks my heart. I've gone to such a dark place of negativity, and struggle to keep a genuine smile on my face anymore. I guess I thought I took time for myself, but I don't think I took quite enough in recent months.

I wanted to get over someone, so I found a guy, and when he hurt my feelings, I found someone else to make me feel better. Ultimately, the most recent guy was someone I expected to break that chain and actually prove himself to be someone who was genuine and wanted to get to know me. He played the part really well but failed, and I think it's because an ex came back into the picture, so ditching me was all too easy. Where did honesty go? When did a lack of words suffice? While it was easy for them to treat me like this and move on, I suffered greatly on the other side. I lost motivation to care about my mental well-being, and treated myself, but went too far, and spent way too much. Material objects like clothes make me feel good, but the rush doesn't last forever. I needed to check myself. No one else knows what I'm truly feeling. Friends can only say so much.

I'm happy one day and upset the next. I find it so hard to watch people who can find relationships so easily, while I struggle. I know I deserve the world, as we all do, and I have been struggling to understand why I can't seem to find anyone who wants me as I want them. I guess the answer to that is that I need to want myself, and be happy in my skin again, in order for that someone to make his presence known in my life. Being lost in the world of social media has warped what is the truth and what isn't, and I've found I can't trust anything I see on there anymore.

I need to take care of myself again, and once I do, I'll really be ready to meet someone. I will stop seeking a guy when I should really be seeking myself and doing things for my benefit only. I don't even know what I love to do anymore, and that's scary. I want a lasting relationship but I know I won't find one in the state I'm in. I want all of you who haven't been putting yourselves first for a while to start doing so. Please stick up for what you want, and don't let stupid boys trying to be men to hurt you the way they have been. You're amazing, and you will find someone. I find it hard to believe what I'm writing at the moment, but I know a year from now I will be in such a different place, and you will too. The words I'm saying hold truth, whether you or I could really believe them right now.

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

Quit Settling For The Boy Who Is Just 'Good Enough'

And start to realize your self-worth

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Quit telling yourself that you are not good enough because that is not true. I have told myself countless times that I am not good enough. Sure, I make mistakes daily and I am not always an easy person to deal with.

However, when you are looking for a boy you should NEVER settle.

If we are being completely honest I am the girl who has always played games, and I am not talking about board games. I am talking about the games where I lead boys on just to turn them down when they ask me out.

I know this might not be the best quality to have, but the truth is commitment scares me and this is the only way I know how to avoid it.

Most men do not stay around long when they find out that you are just playing games, and that you do not actually want to settle down with them.

However, there is this boy who is not like the others because he stuck with me through all of the "games". It does not matter how far I try to push him away he is always right there with me.

Since we are being honest, there never has been a man that has kept my attention for very long. Except for this one that I met four years ago in high school. When I say he is like no other he truly is and he actually understands me sometimes more than I understand myself.

I have stood him up on dates, led him on and I have left him on read countless times. Despite all the games I have played with him he is so persistent. I do not know any other man who would keep trying even after all the games I play. In fact, he is the only one who did not give up on me almost immediately.

It does not matter what time it is or what he is doing he would drop anything just to see me.

Like the time he was on his way to the baseball game and he turned around and went home just so he could see me. There have been countless nights that I have called him, and he has always been there with open arms.

One Sunday morning I was on the way to church and I did not want to go alone, so I called him up and even though he worked all night he still agreed to come with no hesitation. Even when he was hours away for his internship he was always a call away.

More than anything this is the boy who would do anything to see me happy. When I was in a toxic relationship he gave me the best advice. He did not tell me to break up with my ex because he wanted to date me, but it was all for selfless reasons like the most important being my happiness. Even though he wants nothing more than to date me he would give all that up if it meant that I was happy.

Since I am being completely transparent here if you could not already tell I am not the easiest to deal with. I know that I can be a handful, and maybe the same is true for you. However, just because I can be a little much does not mean that I should find someone who just tolerates me or just puts up with me.

Regardless of the kind of girl you are you deserve more and quit telling yourself that he is good enough when you know deep down it is not really enough.

I have always been a free spirit and it is hard for most boys to understand that. I have tried changing for boys and settling down so that I could have a relationship with them.

However, this boy understands who I am and he still loves me for me.

At the end of the day, you cannot change who you truly are because the truth always has a way of coming out. Sure, you could try settling for good enough, but your boy is out there somewhere and when you find him no one else will ever compare. I promise that boy will always be better than just good enough.

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7 Ways My Boyfriend and I Make The Whole ‘Long Distance Thing' Work

Yes, it does suck but there are ways to make it work.

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Long distance.

That has been a phrase dreaded by many and feared by most.

Whether your in the situation because of one person moving, someone studying abroad, or whatever it is, you are faced with the options to either end the relationship or try to make things work long distance.

If you ask people who have tried doing the whole long distance thing and they are honest, they may tell you that it sucks or that it is hard.

And that is true.

But, you should still try it anyways because there are ways to make it work and in the end you will get to be back with them so it will all be worth the emotional pain.

Though it is not super far, my boyfriend and I are about 2 and a half of an hour away from each other now, since we went home for the summer. It has been a big adjustment and a challenge but it can be done. Here is what we do to make it work:

1. Prepare something

I had some time before summer when we were still in school, so I prepared something for him because I knew we would be apart. I made a box of envelopes and each one said to open it on a certain occasion, such as if he missed me or if he had a bad day. I included a letter and a surprise of some sort in each one.

A box like that could be a good idea, which you can find out more details on how to make it here or you could do something such as pre-ordering flowers to be sent to them every month. Anything to help them know that you are thinking of them works!

2. Be honest

Transparency is the best policy here. I trust my boyfriend 100% and I believe he feels the same way so that was never really an issue for us, but the communication that comes with honesty is still very important.

Just be honest about what you are doing and who you are hanging out with. Chances are that if you feel the need to lie about something, then you shouldn't be doing it at all. Especially since you are apart it is important to be candid so that your significant other doesn't have to worry about anything going on that they aren't aware of that could hurt them.

3. FaceTime/Skype

Yes, I know that it is not the same as talking in person, but it is important to try and do this because it is the closest thing you guys will have to being with each other when you are apart.

It also is a good way to end the day so that you can talk to them about your day and catch each other up on things that they may be missing. Remember, at the end of it all, communication is the key. If you don't tell them how you feel things could get messy.

4. Send each other surprises

My boyfriend sends me handwritten surprise letters in the mail, which always make my day when I am missing him a bit more than usual.

This can include things such as letters, a playlist you made for them, or little presents. You don't need to break your bank account for this because anything that lets the other person know that they are misses and cared for will mean a lot to them.

A bonus surprise could also be going down to see them! Imagine how happy they would be!

This also shows that they want this relationship to work and seeing that effort makes it easier to do this whole long distance relationship thing, despite the obstacles.

5. Make time to see each other

Try your best to schedule when you guys can see each other, so you can plan things in advance so you can work around things, such as work.

Make the effort to drive down to see them. I know that realistically going the distance to see them can be expensive and time consuming, but if you really want something to work then you need to be willing to put in the effort.

6. Cry

It is ok to cry. You miss them and you are used to seeing them so crying is only natural.

It can be healthy to just have a good cry and get some of your emotions out. Just try to not cry too much and let this long distance get you depressed. Yes, it is hard, but just remember that if it is meant to be then it will be meant to be.

7. Have faith that things will work out

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