Offset Interrupting Cardi B On-Stage To Beg Her For Forgiveness Is The Epitome Of Male Privilege

Offset Interrupting Cardi B On-Stage To Beg Her For Forgiveness Is The Epitome Of Male Privilege

Stop putting pressure on women to take back the men who don't deserve to be forgiven.

Dr King
Dr King
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On Friday night, Offset posted a video via his Instagram page, practically begging Cardi B to forgive him and spend Christmas together with him as a family.

Now I will admit, these advances did seem like a delicate, little gesture to get her back at first. On one hand, it was nice to see Offset fight for his marriage in a way we've never seen him do before, but on the other hand, it was simply too late. He repeatedly cheated on her even after she had taken him back after the first scandal.

On Saturday, a video circulated of the famous rapper, 21 Savage, standing beside Offset and hyping up a crowd to chant "Cardi, take offset back!" during a live performance. This still may seem like a romantic gesture to some, but I'm here to break it to you...

Constantly begging your ex through a public platform to take you back and getting others involved with the grand scheme is not only an exploitive thing to do but an emotional form of manipulation.

How? Because manipulation starts with not taking accountability and eventually progresses to pushing boundaries. We've already seen before that Offset has a tendency to shift the blame on anyone but himself for his infidelity, saying things like "Y'all won" or "Fuck y'all, I miss Cardi." Now other male celebrities are chiming in, urging her to reconsider the divorce. I wouldn't be surprised if Cardi has thousands of DMs of random people saying the exact same thing.

Just when I thought things couldn't get any more coercive, another video circulated on Sunday morning of Offset bringing out a huge cake set up, completely interrupting Cardi's headlining performance at Rolling Loud. He even gave her flowers that spelled out "Take me back, Cardi." She was visibly upset and even had him removed from the stage. At this point, people can't continue to make excuses for him. Just because they're married doesn't make his emotional abuse acceptable. He treated her like garbage in private and he's now trying to be dramatically nice to her in public so that the world changes their minds about him and pressures her to do what he wants.

These tactics by Offset may have seemed cute at first but now that it's gotten to the point where it's borderline stalking and harassment, and it needs to stop completely.

But let's not forget that this isn't the first example where we've seen this happen.

Remember Robin Thicke's 14-track remorseful album, "Paula"? Paula Patton, his ex-wife, called it quits after infidelity and domestic abuse on his part, but he still did everything in his power to make sure she would go back to him. He eventually pushed her to the point where she felt the need to file a restraining order against him. We've also seen firsthand what happens when the roles are reversed and how women are looked are demonized no matter the outcome. In 2016 many internet trolls attacked the famous singer, Kehlani, for allegedly cheating on Kyrie Irving. The backlash was so brutal that she went into hiding for months before appearing in the public eye consistently again. Anyone would be lying if they said they didn't see the double standard there.

Now I'm not saying there isn't any room for apologies (even public ones) after you've done something wrong. However, the biggest apology is changed behavior.

We're all human and sometimes we fuck up. Sometimes it's a slight mistake and other times it's more severe. That's human nature. We make mistakes, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't strive to grow from our mistakes and be honest with ourselves about who we are. If you've done something to hurt your partner, either fix it and move forward or be more self-aware and realize that maybe you don't need to be in a relationship as opposed to pushing boundaries for sympathy without taking accountability.

From now on, let's stop putting pressure on women to take back the men who do us dirty rather than chastising the guy who wanted to be community dick while already in a relationship.

Dr King
Dr King

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

To The Guy Who Ghosted Me, You Broke Me Into Nothing By Saying Nothing, But Now I'm Bouncing Back

You betrayed me in a way I expected from any other guy but you

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I thought I hit the jackpot. I thought it would take me quite some time to find someone to replace the guy I lost, who I didn't want to lose. I thought no one would come close to him, but that's when I met you. You made me forget about the pain of the past with your comforting words. You were so real, you have gone through your own sets of trials, been through hell and back in many aspects of life, and you were there to talk to me and feed me warm, happy maple syrup feelings I didn't think I'd feel again so soon.

You drip honey, so sticky on the inside but so innocent on the outside, upon first glance.

I gave in to you in every sense. I opened up, I told you things I don't like telling people, especially a random guy I'd just met. You're the kind of guy a girl can look at and say, "Wow, this is going to suck when you leave." You weren't supposed to leave.

I was the girl who wasn't a psycho like your exes, but you couldn't handle something too real, too tame. Your thrill for psychotic bitches is your downfall. I was going to ask you about where we stood and prove doubters wrong. You were the boy I wanted to bring home in a few months time, to meet my family, to meet all of my friends, but you never gave me the chance. You left me to plans that you knew would never happen. You betrayed me in a way I expected from any other guy but you and ripped out a part of me I don't think I'll ever get back.

I trusted you to a fault because I'm someone who always looks for the benefit of the doubt in a situation. I cut you slack, I gave you chances to tell me the truth. You owed me the truth and all I got was you watching my stories on Snapchat, an answer without words. You bought me flowers and candy for Valentine's Day and made me pasta twice because you knew I loved it. You let me meet your dog. How dare you do things for me to treat me like something so disposable? Did I ever even matter? I felt something so real, a cosmic connection, and you broke it with ease. You broke me into nothing by saying nothing, but now I'm bouncing back.

I may not be making any leaps or bounds at the moment, but I'm going to get back out there. It's unfortunate that you defiled the trust I had, but I'm not going to let that stop me from opening up to anyone else. It's just going to be a rougher road to walk on since you've taken the smooth exterior away. It took me days before I could really cry over you. I cried hot tears of true pain, that burned my face when they fell. That being said, those tears have stopped now. I prayed over getting you back, asking those watching over me to reverse what's written for me, to give me you again, to have you give me an answer.

You're not supposed to be with me. I'm not supposed to be with you. You're another step closer to who I'm supposed to be with. Maybe it's you, just down the line when you get it together, but I certainly am not holding my breath for you or anyone else who hurts me ever again.

You ghosted me, and now you're a part of the list of boys who have done the same thing. Your ghosting stung a lot and left me more vulnerable than usual. But I'm not letting you and your lack of respect for me prevent me from moving on. I won't see you around, except on Snapchat, watching my stories while I watch yours. I'm writing this for me as I heal and look forward to the day ambulance sirens and the sound of saying your name in conversations stops hurting me.

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Hey Little Sis, Heartbreaks Are Rough, But I Promise You That It's Going To Be OK

I've been there — we've all been there — and it sucks, but it's not the end of the world, I promise.

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Dear Little Sister,

I know this sucks. Heartbreak is hard. Your first relationship lasted much longer than mine did, so I can only imagine how much more it hurts right now. I get it. But, you aren't alone in what you're feeling. So, here is my best advice for you.

Your feelings are completely valid

It does not matter if you broke up with him, or if you're still young, or anything anyone else wants to say. Your feelings are valid because they are what you are feeling. No one has the right to tell you what to feel—you have a right to feel your feelings fully.

Keep your chin up

You are a complete person all on your own—you don't need no man! You are great the way you are, and strong enough to get through it all.

Stay positive

This relationship didn't work out? That's OK! You're that much closer to finding the one that will. Mom's right—this just teaches you more of what you do or don't want in a relationship.

Don't jump into another relationship right away

I know you're used to having someone there, and the company and support are great. But don't let someone you care about become a rebound. If they really care about you, they'll wait until you're sure of yourself again. You deserve time to yourself.

You're going to learn who your real friends are—lean on them.

If your friends feel the need to pick sides over your relationship ending, they probably weren't really your friends to start with. Your friend circle is going to shrink a little, but that's OK. It's best to know who is there for you now. And while you're leaning on your friends, don't forget you can lean on your family. I know when you're 15 it can be hard to relate to your parents, but I promise you they care about you.

If you want to chill with Ben & Jerry for a while, that's cool

Puns completely intended. But, go ahead and eat the ice cream (there's no reason not to). You deserve it.

Do not forget your worth

You are beautiful and smart and kind. You deserve the best. Live your best life, my dear.

I know I don't have all the answers, but I hope this helps. I am always here for you.

I love you,

Your big sister

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