No, Becky, You Can't Know You Want A 'Ring By Spring,' Your Head Isn't Even Fully Developed

No, Becky, You Can't Know You Want A 'Ring By Spring,' Your Head Isn't Even Fully Developed

Love is something to be cherished and marriage is not something to be rushed.


I want to preface this by saying that I do not hate love. I do not hate seeing people in love and I do not hate the concept of love in general. Quite the opposite, actually... I love love.

I have been with my boyfriend for over two and a half years and I love him a lot. When I picture myself in the future five years from now, I can picture us still together.

Like many other girls, I fantasize about my wedding and the dress and the ring and the food and the ceremony...

With that being said, I am not planning on getting engaged anytime soon.

I had not heard the term "ring by spring" until this year, but apparently, it is a popular thing. People want to be engaged before they graduate from college.

Yes, let me say that again—before they graduate from college.

Also known as before they have a stable income, before they have had experience in the real world, before they have their own house, before they need to pay their own bills...

Where is the money coming from to pay for the engagement ring? Where is the money coming from to pay for the wedding? Where do you have time to plan a wedding while also finishing up your degree?

This seems like a great idea.

The human brain is not fully developed until at least the age of 25 (yes, this statistic gets thrown around a lot, but it is also very true. I learned the details about it in both my endocrinology and my psychology classes). The part that is still developing is called the prefrontal cortex (i.e. the part controlling impulsive decision making as well as planning in general).

So, what is the rush to get married before then?

When individuals get engaged in college, it seems to be a way to "legitimize" their relationship.

Can you tell me this, who exactly decided that your relationship is not real until you put a ring on it?

Who decided that those feelings of love and loyalty and passion and honesty are not truly real until there is a ring on your finger?

I decided to expedite my college career, I earned my Bachelor of Science in three years and am working on my Master of Business Administration during my fourth year. After this year, I am hoping to attend a veterinary school which will be another four years. After that, I will get a job and begin to earn my own income so I can actually support myself.

After that, I will be ready to get married.

When I get married, I hope that it will be forever. And, well, the fact of the matter is, divorce rates increase if you are under the age of 25. Research from the University of Utah actually shows that the best ages to get married are between the ages of 28 and 32.

My parents dated for a few years, broke up for a few years, and then ended up getting back together thanks to fate. They always tell me that if they got married the first time they were together, they would no doubt be divorced. They said they both grew so much during their early 20s that it totally changed them and their relationship.

Marriage is not something that needs to be rushed—it is not some sort of prize to reach the quickest. You and your significant other deserve to experience life together (I mean real life together, outside of college) before you decide to spend the rest of your lives with each other.

Get engaged for the right reasons. Do not get engaged because it "seems cool" or because your other friends are getting engaged or because you think that will prevent your relationship from ever breaking up.

When you get engaged, do it because you are in love and are ready to build a life together and to support each other.

If you know in your heart of hearts that your relationship is ready for marriage, then go for it. But, do not get engaged before you are truly ready just to fit some trend like "ring by spring" or to adhere to some social pressure to get married by age X, buy a house by age Y, and have kids by age Z.

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

16 Wedding Gifts Under $50 That'll Have Any Wedding Guest Say 'I Do'

Because being on a budget doesn't mean you have to arrive at a wedding empty-handed.


If you're on a budget but have a wedding to go to, it can be hard to find an affordable wedding gift you can buy for the bride and groom. You don't want to show up empty-handed, but you also don't want to spend an arm and a leg on a gift when there are plenty of other people attending who are better off affording certain items. (A good rule of thumb? Always try to "pay for your plate" — or the cost of what the bride and groom likely paid for you to be there.)

Most of the time, there are lots of things you can find on a registry under $50. Whether it be towels, a waffle maker or oven mitts, you can usually find SOMETHING in your price range. If not, this list is for you.

Brides-to-be: Here is a list of things to add to your wedding registry for your broke AF friends.

Broke friends: Here is a list of things to get if everything on your friend's list is way out of your price range.

1. Personalized cutting board

Personalized Cutting Board, 12 Designs & 3 Sizes, Bamboo Cutting Board, Wedding Gifts for Couple, Housewarming Gift & Kitchen Sign - Butcher Block Inlay Board #G

2. Cookbook

The Complete Cooking for Two Cookbook, Gift Edition: 650 Recipes for Everything You'll Ever Want to Make

3. Meat and cheese board

Bamboo Cheese Board and Knife Set - Charcuterie Board Set for Cheese Platter. Wood Serving Tray For Wine, Meat, Appetizers, Snacks - Entertaining Kitchenware Gift Ideas for Wedding and Housewarming

4. Handheld vacuum

Handheld Vacuum Cordless, HUNLEE 5KPA Powerful Suction Hand Vacuum Cordless Cleaner Rechargeable Hand Vac with 2.5h Quick Charge, Lightweight Hand Held Vacuum Cordless for Home and Car Cleaning

5. Carry on

COOLIFE Luggage Expandable(only 28") Suitcase PC+ABS Spinner 20in 24in 28in Carry on (White Grid New, S(20in)_Carry on)

6. Blender

NutriBullet NBR-1201 12-Piece High-Speed Blender/Mixer System, Gray (600 Watts)

7. Crock-Pot

Crock-Pot SCCPVL610-S-A 6-Quart Cook & Carry Programmable Slow Cooker with Digital Timer Stainless Steel

8. Bathroom towels

Luxury Hotel & Spa Bath Towel 100% Genuine Turkish Cotton, 27" x 54", Set of 4, White

9. Waffle maker

Cuisinart WAF-F10 Belgian Waffle Maker, Stainless Steel

10. Tools

DEKOPRO 128 Piece Tool Set-General Household Hand Tool Kit, Auto Repair Tool Set, with Plastic Toolbox Storage Case

11. Kitchen tools

Stainless Steel Kitchen Utensil Set - 29 Cooking Utensils - Nonstick Kitchen Utensils Cookware Set with Spatula - Best Kitchen Gadgets Kitchen Tool Set Gift by HomeHero

12. Baking dishes

Staub Ceramic 2-pc Rectangular Baking Dish Set - Rustic Red

13. Kitchen Towels

The Weaver's Blend Set of 3 Kitchen Towels + 3 Dish Cloths, Basket Weave, 100% Cotton, Absorbent, Size 28"x18" and 12'x12", Yellow Stripe, Kitchen Towels and Dish Cloths

14. Cute AF oven mitts

RED LMLDETA Oven Mitts Set of 2 with Transparent Clear Silicone Shell and Nice Dog Printing Cotton Lining, Heat Resistant to 500 F Kitchen Oven Gloves Pot Holder for Cooking (Blue)

15. Kitchen knife

J.A. Henckels International CLASSIC 8" Chef's Knife

16. Pizza cutter

16" Pizza Cutter by Kitchenstar | Sharp Stainless Steel Slicer Knife - Rocker Style w Blade Cover | Chop and Slices Perfect Portions + Dishwasher Safe - Premium Pizza Accessories

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10 Bible Quotes For The Engaged Couple That Can't Wait To Say 'I Do'

Make some room for Jesus in your head that's full of wedding bells.


Getting engaged is one of the most exciting experiences in a person's life. The whole world finally has more of an understanding of how deep and unconditional your love is for each other. After all, you have officially promised to spend the rest of eternity with that special person!

For many Christians, getting engaged is also a time for the couple to seek religious guidance.

Here are 10 Bible quotes that any couple anxious to say "I Do" should read.

1. 2 Corinthians 4:18

"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

2. 1 Corinthians 13: 4-5

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs."

3. Isaiah 62:5

"As a young man marries a young woman, so will your Builder marry you; as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you."

4. Matthew 19:6

"What God has joined together let no man put asunder."

5. Romans 12:9-10

"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honour one another above yourselves."

6. Proverbs 31:10-11

"An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain."

7. John 15:12

"My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you."

8. Mark 10:7-8

"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh."

9. Proverbs 18:22

"He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favour from the Lord."

10. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up."

Congratulations on your engagement, and remember to keep God close by for every step of the way.

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