Once you've been betrayed by someone in a relationship, whether it's unfaithfulness, abuse or a combination of the two, your outlook on trust is completely different in your relationships to follow. This isn't necessarily a bad thing—it's extremely important to learn from your romantic experiences in order to keep improving your love life.
However, when your trust abilities are so damaged to a point that can become mentally exhausting in proceeding relationships, it's necessary to be proactive about repairing your trust. Although you can't change what happened to you in your past, you CAN take some of these steps to help maintain your confidence in a new relationship:
1. Read a lot
Even reading this article counts. Reading self-help books, stories and content related to these personal challenges can help to broaden your perspective on your love life and ease your mind about the many worries you probably have when trying to trust again. Whether it's a psychological book or empowering poetry, reading about others' similar experiences and how they've overcome them is living proof that you'll be able to heal completely. Don't think you're alone in these feelings.
2. Have an honest conversation with your current partner
You can't expect your partner to understand how you're feeling unless you have an open dialogue with them. And guess what? They're probably going to be more understanding than you think—if they aren't, they're probably not the best partner for you.
3. Be honest with yourself
GiphyIf these mental roadblocks become too overwhelming for you, it's important to be honest with yourself about where you're at and whether or not a relationship is something you should be doing right now. Maybe you need more time on your own, or maybe this is something you need to face while in a relationship. It's up to you—not anyone else.
4. Self care, self care, self care
This may not sound related to trust issues, but self care is so necessary for everyone, and it's especially important when you're struggling with some personal challenges like this. Remember to take time out of your day to take care of yourself. Exercise, bubble baths, sleep, music—you name it. The better you feel mentally and physically, the easier this will be to overcome.
5. Remind yourself that every new relationship is a blank page
It's not a continuation of the relationship that damaged you. Just because someone else hurt you doesn't mean that everyone following them will, too. I know, it's a hard thing to wrap around your head, but you can't forget it.