It's not a secret that every relationship has problems. However, if your relationship is teetering on the edge of a breakup and you want to save the connection that you have, it might be time to take a look at your behavior. You account for 50% of the relationship, and some extra effort just might be what your relationship needs to get over a difficult spot.
But I have to tell you that it won't be easy. You need to understand your mistakes, take accountability for your actions, and make some serious changes for the future. Here are 10 signs that you may be the biggest problem in your relationship.
1. You start fights over little things that don't matter
When you nitpick and always find something to argue over, that kind of behavior is self-destructive. It harms you and your partner. When you think back on it, you're probably going to feel stupid over ruining a whole day over something so trivial. Plus, little things can pile up, and lead to much larger issues.
2. You're too needy
Most people love affection and attention. It's a big part of a relationship. However, it's definitely possible to cross boundaries. If you can't go a second without texting your boyfriend, you need to chill. If you request your girlfriend's whereabouts multiple times every day, you need to chill. If you act like your partner shouldn't ever spend time with anyone but you, you need to chill.
3. You're always busy
On the flip side, being too busy can be an issue. You don't want your partner to feel like they aren't important to you. Spend time with them. Go on dates. Show them how much they mean to you.
4. You suck at communicating
As someone who struggles to properly explain their emotions, I know that this one can sometimes be tough. And as long as you're trying your best, that's okay. However, if you shut off your phone when your S.O. calls you multiple times, frequently hide your feelings or intentions, or walk away during serious discussions (for no reason other than you don't want to be bothered by them anymore), your actions will hurt your relationship.
5. You're not in it for the right reasons
Maybe this is your rebound relationship. Maybe you're only dating them because they're loaded. Maybe you're only dating them because they're hot. Regardless, your intentions will probably be revealed sooner or later, so be ready for that.
6. You say hurtful things to your S.O.
Calling your partner a "bitch" when you're upset is disrespectful. Using personal information that they disclosed to you against them shows just how immature you are. Be careful what you say because you can't take back your words.
7. You have trouble staying loyal
If you're in a monogamous relationship and you check out other people, flirt with other people, or kiss/touch/sleep with other people, 1) you suck and 2) you're destroying the foundation of trust that you have with your S.O. Trust is so much easier to break than to build up.
8. You constantly do things you know they wouldn't like
Such as partying and getting drunk every weekend or hanging out with your ex. Of course, you have the freedom to do as you please, but that doesn't mean your partner is going to be happy about it. And doesn't mean they won't resent you for it.
9. You always talk badly about them to your friends
You might want to think about how your S.O. would feel if they knew what you were saying about them. Would you regret talking in the first place?
10. You drag them down
Your partner was in three different clubs and could easily get straight A's every semester. But since they started dating you, everything has been a mess. They're always crying over you. You get into so many fights that it messes with their head and it's hard for them to focus on their school work. People are starting to notice how toxic things are. I know that you want to save the relationship, but that may not be the best choice. Let them go.