Lately, it seems like every day on Instagram and Facebook, I'm seeing another person my age getting engaged.
Every time I hang out with friends I haven't seen in awhile, they're telling me they've met the boy that they just know they're going to marry. And yet here I am, surrounded by friends who are falling in love and making commitments and growing up, single without even the prospect of a real relationship anywhere on my horizon.
At first, I would get so jealous every time I saw someone post on social media about their happy relationship or how they had finally found the one and we're getting engaged.
I truly started to feel like I wasn't good enough for anyone to love me. I felt like because I didn't have a boyfriend that I was ugly, or annoying, or just unworthy of having that connection with another person. Every single time I would see someone post about getting into a relationship or getting engaged, it felt like a blow to the chest. I wanted more than anything to experience that kind of love. I wanted someone to look at me the same way that I saw so many of my friends' boyfriends look at them. I was so lonely and honestly desperate for a relationship. However, as I prayed about it and really continued to struggle with it, I realized that just because now is their time, doesn't mean it has to be mine.
Singleness can be a blessing.
It allows you to explore and do your own thing without having to focus on a relationship. It gives you the time and space you need to grow and learn how you really are by yourself. It allows you to foster relationships with friends and family that don't always get as much attention when you're in a romantic relationship. And most importantly, it allows you to fully understand your worth. Singleness teaches you not to settle for anything less than the love that you deserve, and that is definitely important going into a serious relationship.
So, if you're single in a season where it seems like practically everyone else is not, embrace it.
Fall in love with yourself before you chase after a boy that doesn't deserve you. Once you stop chasing love, you will find that you don't need another person to be happy. Once you stop looking for your "other half," you will come to realize that you are already whole on your own. Once you stop envying the relationships that you see all of your friends in, you will see that you are actually genuinely happy for them.
Being single is hard.
It can be lonely, but it can also be enlightening. It not only gets you to think about the kind of person you really want for a spouse, but it shows you the kind of person you don't want as well. As lonely as you may be, you will come to realize that you can't force someone to love you the way you want and deserve to be loved, no matter how hard you try. If they're not the one, they're not the one. I am so confident in the fact that God has a man out there for me, and I know now without a shadow of a doubt that I will meet them when He is ready for me to meet them, no matter how ready I might think I am now.
I no longer resent my friends for falling in love.
My chest no longer aches with jealousy every time I hear of another person my age getting engaged. Instead, I've learned to wait patiently for my time to come, and I have never been more content in waiting.