Whether or not you're Khloe Kardashian or Jordyn Woods, everyone has had a "Tristan Thompson" in their lives at some point... or maybe that's just me.

Personally, I've been so exhausted about all this scandalous drama and it has no relevance in my life what so ever. However, my personal opinion is: WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT HOW TRISTAN THOMPSON IS A SERIAL CHEATER AND A DICK?

I think we can all acknowledge that Thompson is a stereotypical fuckboy, so here are a few texts that you'd probably get from your own Tristan Thompson:

1. "U up?" 

10 out of 10 women have received this text once in their lifetime.

2. Typical 


3. My personal favorite 

I have PTSD just from seeing this.

or a different variation

4. Fool me once 

Alexa? Play Jolene by Dolly Parton.

5. Fool me twice 

Do cousins kiss?

6. Shame on me 

7. The go getter 

8. *eye rolls* 


9. The swerve 

That's some shady business.

10. Of course she is. 

9 out of 10 times she usually is. I can say that because I was definitely the crazy ex.

11. Wait, you were seeing someone else this whole time? 

12. How could I forget? 

No girl actually enjoys getting nudes or giving them!

13. I thought it was the other way around 

Maybe not. Thanks though!

14. Oh it's 11:11 make a wish 

I wish for you to stop texting me.

15. They always know what to say 

16. Don't fall for it, girl! 

17. The truth 

18. The winner 

A very wise woman told me, "if he says this to you, run."