To The Girl Who Needs To Hear This, If He ACTUALLY Missed You, He Would Make Plans With You, Not Just Text You About It

To The Girl Who Needs To Hear This, If He ACTUALLY Missed You, He Would Make Plans With You, Not Just Text You About It

"I don't really miss you, but I'm just saying that to keep you on my back burner in case you seem really interesting later on when I'm lonely again."

968
views

So you met this new guy.

But wait— he's not just any kind of guy.

This guy could really be the One.

You know how it goes. That awesome first date. The swoon-worthy goodnight kiss. The text messages that flood your inbox minutes after you two part, where he's just dying to figure out when you can meet up again.

"So, when can I see you again? Next weekend?"

"Damn, I miss you already."

And to say you're excited is an understatement. You're just dying to see him again, too.

A few days pass and you go on a second date with him.

You have so many expectations about how amazing this date will be, too.

But something just seems a little off.

He's not as talkative this time around. He's not asking you enough questions to hold the conversation. He's not making eye contact with you across the table and when it's time to part ways, he doesn't lean in for a kiss, or even a hug, or even bother walking you to your car.

Alert. Sirens go off in the distance.

You begin to worry that maybe you were a bit too crazy around him. The whole "What the f*ck is wrong with me?" realization that maybe, perhaps you scared him away.

But as you rewind the entire date inside your head on your drive back home, you start making assumptions about him.

You start making excuses for yourself, because you just want to believe that you were merely overreacting or simply delusional.

Maybe he had a bad day at work.

Maybe he's normally like that, but you were too nervous on the first date to actually see that side of him.

Maybe, maybe.

All these "maybes" are slowly destroying your brain cells one by one, not to mention they're borderline making you lose your mind over this guy because look, just a few days ago, he said he missed you, right?

Suddenly your phone lights up and it's a text from him.

"Miss you. Goodnight."

And you breathe a sigh of relief. Because, well, that "miss you" pretty much solidified his feelings towards you.

If he wasn't really that into you, he wouldn't say that, right?

Or so you thought.

Days pass by. Days turn into weeks and weeks turn into a month.

But he still hasn't reached out to you about when you two should meet up again. And when you swallow your own pride by hinting at him about how much you miss him, he has a line of excuses lined up about why he can't come see you and potential reasons behind why you can't even drive your ass over to his neck of the woods to see his face.

He assures you, though, that he misses you.

Misses you so much.

Misses your beautiful smile and that pretty face.

Misses the way you made him feel.

Meanwhile you're clawing at your phone while screaming: "if you really miss me, then why aren't you doing something about it?"

In a world where communication revolves around text messages, Snapchats and DMs rather than in-person face-to-face conversations, many of the things we say to one another can become ambiguous. In other words, we don't exactly mean the literal meanings behind certain phrases.

For example, when we say LOL we aren't exactly laughing out loud in the middle of a dead quiet lecture hall, reading something your best friend just texted you.

When we say "Great, looking forward to it!" on an email to a colleague, we don't necessarily mean we're really looking forward to a new project. Deep inside—we're dreading the immense amount of work that's about to follow along with it.

In this case: the convenience of an "I miss you."

When someone tells you "I miss you," it can indirectly mean a lot of things. Of course, it can be 100% direct as the literal meaning of the emotional nostalgia of being around someone. But it can also mean something along the lines of: hey, I'm still putting in the effort to talk to you but I'm not going to go out of my way to have to see you in person.

Or worst case scenario: I don't really miss you, but I'm just saying that to keep you on my back burner in case you seem really interesting later on when I'm lonely again.

So here's the overall truth that you need to accept: he doesn't really miss you. Because, if he did, he would react to those feelings and do something about it.

Even if it takes him an hour and a half to drive through bumper-to-bumper traffic to come to see you, he would go out of his way to take you out.

Even if he has a million things going on at work, he would always make the time to see you and make you a top priority.

Name any excuse—and really ask yourself if he would really be giving that excuse in the first place if he really, truly, desperately wanted to see you.

Why do you deserve to be on someone's back burner when you can be worth so much more?

Why do you have to put up with all of his excuses?

Why do you need to feel delusional and overly attached towards a guy who can't even spare an hour to come be with you?

Come on—you mean so much more than that.

If he treats you like a joke, you should leave him like it's funny.

Remember that, the next time a boy dares to play this ruthless game with you.

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

Sorry Boys, But I Won’t Be That Girl Who Waits Around For You Anymore

Just because I know my worth doesn't mean I should have to wait around for you to realize it too.

ninitran2
ninitran2
1429
views

I'm like most girls. I am such a hopeless romantic when it comes to dating and all that jazz. With that being said, I have also been the type of girl who has waited around for that guy once or twice (OK let's be real, one too many times).

I am a nice person and a lot of my friends know that I have a kind heart. You can do me dirty and I will forgive you. When it came to guys they could have led me on or ghosted me and later on came back out of nowhere and apologized, more than likely I would have given them a second chance at redemption.

I waited around for that guy to either realize how great we would be together or realize how great of a girl I was. All of my friends would tell me how great I was and how worthy I was but in the end, they weren't the ones I wanted to hear that from. Which was why I waited around and thought up of an excuse to defend the guy I was waiting around for.

The older I got the more I realized how silly I was for waiting around for a guy who probably did not appreciate me the way I should have been appreciated. I realized that I was much better than that and I made a promise that I would stop waiting around. Of course, I did slip up here and there (I mean, I am only human after all).

It wasn't until I was beyond over the male species that I realize how ridiculous I was being for crying over someone who stopped talking to me without rhyme or reason. That was the moment that I realized how worthy I was of a great relationship. A relationship that you see in movies or see in old couples who have been married for 65 years.

I decided I was no longer going to be THAT girl who waited around for a guy. I was no longer going to defend him when my friends asked me why I was still talking to him. I was no longer going to wait around for him to realize how worthy I was. Ever since I promised myself that I was going to live MY best life I have been beyond happy.

Yeah sometimes I say to myself "he was different" but then I remind myself that if he truly cared for me the way I cared for him then I would not have to wait around. He would not only pursue me but also my heart.

So ladies, realize your worth. Stop waiting around for that guy to come to the conclusion how amazing you are. You are a queen and if he can't see that right off the bat, he is NOT worth your time. Wear your crown with your head held high, live your best life, and slay the day away, queen.

ninitran2
ninitran2

OMG, check these out

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

You’re Not Going To Meet Someone On Your Couch Watching Netflix, So Get Your Ass Up

Dating isn't easy, but getting off the couch shouldn't be too hard.

1227
views

I don't mean to come off as harsh.

The words are directed at me just as much as they are anyone else. Dating isn't easy, especially when most of us have been out of practice. Even as an extroverted person, the idea of striking up a conversation with an attractive guy makes me anxious. If you are fine with being single then this article isn't for you but for the rest of us who want to change our stagnant relationship status, keep on reading.

Dating has changed drastically since our parents' days. In-person conversations have shifted to words on screens, while dinners and drive-in movie theaters have turned into "Netflix and chill." While some of us might be OK with these casual meetings, others want to be wooed. No matter what kind of relationship you're looking for, I can tell you that you aren't going to find it while laying on your couch. Starting something new is stressful and nerve-wracking, but you have to start somewhere. Sometimes we need to get out of our comfort zones in order to put ourselves in a situation to meet someone new. Whether it's a house party, a nice night out with your girls, or maybe even an invite to study with a new group of friends, these all have the possibility of you putting yourself out there.

There is the potential to meet someone new anywhere: the library, the grocery store, or even in class. While it's important to put yourself out there, don't put so much pressure on everyone you meet. Some people are meant to just be friends, while others have the possibility to be so much more. If you try and it doesn't work out with one person, don't beat yourself up — maybe it wasn't meant to be, or the timing just wasn't right. All I'm trying to say is that you will never know what's out there if you don't get off the couch. I've had a lot of heartbreak in my life and sometimes I think that stops me from trying something new. It's hard to come to terms with that you might be what's stopping you from having a relationship with somebody. We need to remind ourselves that we deserve to be loved and be happy, and a healthy romantic relationship can give us that, we just have to be willing to try.

So strike up a conversation with the cute guy in your English class. Text the boy who you've always wondered "what if." Flirt with the guy who you make eye contact with across the bar. Or don't. The choice is yours. Sitting on the couch hasn't been working for you though, so you might as well try something new.

If you're truly content with being single, I'm happy for you. Keep watching Netflix on your couch, don't let me stop you. But for everyone else who wants to change their relationship status, pause the show, close the laptop or turn off the TV. Try something new, even though it's scary. I'm not saying a boyfriend will just fall into your lap, but it certainly doesn't hurt to try.

Someone could be out there waiting for you, all you have to do is get off the damn couch.

OMG, check these out

Facebook Comments