Dear Future Boyfriend, I Hope This Finds You, And I Hope You Find Me

Dear Future Boyfriend, I Hope This Finds You, And I Hope You Find Me

I hope all that I want is all that you want too.

I'm in that phase right now where I'm busy enough that I don't need a boyfriend, but tend to have points that I desire one.

I mean, having a boyfriend wouldn't be a bad thing at the moment, but I tend to be weird about my feelings at times - possibly because I have never had a real father figure in my life - only my big brother who I think is a hopeless romantic. I love listening to him sometimes and how old-fashioned he is, I don't know if my mom taught us that or that's just the way we are. At times I consider myself to be old-fashioned and these days, that's tough to be because of the amount of one night stands people have is mind-blowing.

I don't know if that's all they are in it for or if that's all they need. I don't know about you, but I want someone to love me back just as much as I love them. I want my future guy to be my best friend first. Someone I can talk to and constantly be having that laughing stomach pain with. I want you to constantly be complimenting me on everything about me, not just the outside, but my personality, and everything that makes me, me. I want you to know that much about me. I want you to listen to me complain all the time and feel sorry for me, but then 10 minutes later agree with me that I'm overthinking and overreacting, and to stop it and be thankful.

I want to be able to always trust you, even though earning my trust will be difficult because I do have trust issues. That's just because of all the crappy people in this world mostly guys. I don't want you to be in the category of "Feek-Boi" EVER. I want to only have eyes for me. I want us to have the same interests and be like one another but yet so different that we can teach each other new things. I want you to always have respect for me and appreciate all I will do for you. I want to be able to feel safe when I'm with you and know that you will protect me no matter what, and if you can't, I got us both!

I want to be able to look up to you and be inspired by all you have achieved or plan on achieving. I want you to truly love me and be passionate towards me and in all things about us. I want to know that I can depend on you no matter how hard it gets. Depending on you is a really big deal to me, because when life is hard and I'm crying or need another opinion, or anything, I want you to be there for me when others can't be. Actually, I want you to be there first and make sure of it because you care that much. I want to be able to lay my head on your shoulder while having you tell me that everything is going to be okay. I want us to not only share our own dreams and goals, but create ones for the both of us together.

Wow, I may want a lot, but doesn't everyone? I'm not ashamed of it at all. All that I want and more is what I think I deserve and so do you. All women deserve the best and a man that will treat them right because you know, most of the time, we treat you like gold.

To my future guy, I don't know when I will meet you, or how. But, I'm not going to look for you. I'm just going to let it happen, I think. Who knows? I'm just going with the flow at the moment.

But I can't wait to meet you.

Cover Image Credit:

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

An Open Letter To The Girl In A Toxic Relationship Who Doesn't See The Signs To Let Go

"it took letting go to realize that I was holding onto nothing" -R.H Sin


Dear you,

I hope you're doing well. I once thought I was too. I once thought that if he would just change, for me, everything would work. However, my sweet girl, you should not have to change people, you should not have to push people to be better, for you. You cannot help anyone, that does not want to help themselves.

In the movies, we learn to love a bad boy that needs changing. However, it isn't always your job to be boys saving grace. However, his shaming and emotional abuse is not just something you should put up with so that you can love him. That is not loving.

Love is not a constant competition of who could belittle the other one first. Love is not asking for a hug and being told no. Love does not make you feel stupid for bringing up things that hurt your feelings.

Love does not grow angry because you talk to your mom about your feelings. Love does not body shame. Love does not constantly change the passcode to their phone.

Love does not laugh when you find out they're unfaithful. Love does not tell you that you are not smart enough to accomplish anything. Love does not force their hand up your thigh when the words "no" slip out of your mouth.

Love is the warmth of a hand on your cheek when you get anxious. Love is getting your backpack out the car for you. Love is turning around when you need them. Love compromises.

Love is encouraging. Love is proud. Love is forgiving. Love sees you for who you are. Love knows you are worthy.

God is your Father and you are His daughter, so do not believe for one second that this abuse is the love you think you deserve.

Love will not always be easy. Love will be challenging and a constant prayer to not anger so quickly.

However, do not mix up challenging with the abuse. If you are losing the good pieces of yourself, then it isn't love. I know that you put a lot of time and effort into this relationship, but it is no good, you are holding on to someone whose heart is not in the right place to love you.

I connected with a poem from R. H. Sin, once I left my toxic relationship which reads, "it took letting go to realize that I was holding onto nothing."

Darling girl, you are so loved by so many people, do not let this relationship hold you back or make you feel less worthy than you are. I have always been the girl with her nose stuck up in the air smelling for smoke, to follow the trail to a burning house to find a boy that needed saving, but it is more than likely a boy that lit the fire in the first place and needs changing.

So, do not be me, be better. Be the girl that lights her own world on fire, for her work, for her family, for God. You are you and you are amazing, so do not fear being without him.

You will feel as if you have come up for air after drowning in an ocean that you had no idea you were swimming in.

The emotional abuse that this boy has put you through and maybe even physical abuse will leave you building walls around your heart. It will make other relationships hard, but you are so so strong.

You will meet someone that makes you so happy and feel so easy to love, you will never understand how you stuck around with the one that hurt you for so long.

You deserve to grow from this, and I promise you will.

Let go.


The girl who learned from a toxic relationship

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Being Far Away From My Boyfriend Actually Strengthened Our Relationship Instead Of Forcing It Apart

While we were apart, we became closer.


Before I really start this article, I just want to say that my relationship isn't truly a long distance relationship. We are both college students at the same university eight months out of the year, but the other four months we live quite a distance apart. Even during those four months, we are only about 150 miles from each other as the bird flies, but really about three hours from each other.

Being in a relationship where I'm not able to see my boyfriend every day or even every week has been a real challenge. But it's been a good challenge. It hasn't been a challenge because I've felt unfaithful or fallen out of love with him in any way. It's challenging because I miss him. We both work jobs and our schedules aren't the same and oftentimes we aren't able to talk to each other unless it's early in the morning or late at night. There are times when all I want to do is talk to him and tell him about how my day went and get a big bear hug from him. Unfortunately, I'm not really able to do this.

I firmly believe that being apart from each other for days, weeks, or even months have brought us closer than we could've ever imagined. We knew that this would be difficult, and we knew that there would be bad days, but we decided to power through it. It has made each time that we are able to see each other so much more special and meaningful.

Seeing each other has become more of spending time with each other than just laying around on the couch playing around on our phones. It's become really getting to know each other better and catching up on all the things we had missed. It's become a time for us to simply be in each other's presence and enjoy being able to talk face to face without a phone in the middle of us. We go on more adventurous dates, we take more pictures, and I think we would both easily say that we fall more and more in love with each other after each opportunity we have to spend time together.

Spending time together is no longer a daily activity, but it has become a right to be earned through hard work and several paychecks as travel can become expensive. We no longer take opportunities to see each other for granted, and it has made us grow closer because we aren't able to spend time together often. We look forward to the days when we won't have to worry about being apart but know that this is only a stepping stone in our relationship.

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