No Nut November Only Makes Sense If You Have A Tree Nut Allergy, Idiots

No Nut November Only Makes Sense If You Have A Tree Nut Allergy, Idiots

No one's testosterone will be benefited. No gains will be made. No spiritual enlightenment will be found at the end of the month.

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Forget No Shave November which brings awareness to prostate cancer and other male-oriented issues, No Nut November supposedly is the more masculine alternative that somehow is supposed to prove one's control and machismo.

But, unlike the month-long journey devoted to a good cause, No Nut November is simply nutty, especially since, ironically, "masturbating helps reduce the chance of prostate cancer."

According to Urban Dictionary, the ridiculous rules to No Nut November generally state that you must abstain from sex or masturbation in any shape or form (yet some players do have sex with their partner). However, watching pornography and getting hard are allowed, but you can't cum. Moreover, only one wet dream is permitted and you've only got one chance to succeed. Good luck, and if you triumph with zero busts, you qualify for Destroy Dick December.

And all along I thought May was National Masturbation Month.




Masturbation is not only pleasurable but healthy and quite common for men of all ages. According to FiveThirtyEight, "when men in their 30s were asked whether they had masturbated alone at any point in their life, 93.4 percent said yes." This shouldn't be shocking. As we lose the stigma around sex and sexuality, masturbation must be included. It's normal and no sexually viable man needs to deprive himself of this orgasmic diversion during the month of November. It just doesn't make sense.

Also, to the husbands, fiances, boyfriends, fuck buddies, and one-night standers, don't take away your D from the girls!


Guys, you aren't proving your masculinity to anyone. I get it, you're just having fun with your friends, challenging one another, and goofing around, but, I mean, really? This is the most senseless behavior to prove any sort of virility. Masturbation doesn't need to take a holiday. If anything, you should be wanking off more often to represent your robustness. I speak for many other girls when I claim that if anyone of us woke up with a penis, we'd be giving ourselves self-love all day. Be your own best friend and do it for all the jealous girls who wish it was just as easy for them to blow.

Listen, I am no one to tell you when you can entertain your own sexual activities, but I just want to share the idea that cheating yourself of euphoria isn't necessary to boost your testosterone for any advantage.

No, this is not the greatest test of willpower.

I have no personal experience that abstaining from masturbation "clears your mind" and helps with concentration as you "do things you never thought possible," but let's recognize that as hilarious as the memes are, you won't gain any magical powers. I'm sure this challenge requires a great deal of mind control, but this can be accomplished in more practical ways.

I mean, really?

No one's testosterone will be benefited. No gains will be made. No spiritual enlightenment will be found at the end of the month.

If that doesn't persuade you that No Nut November is useless, acknowledge that in our sex-phobic culture we don't need any more societal behaviors that shame the healthy, instinctive act of sex.

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

Tumblr Is Specifically Targeting Women By Banning Porn

Tumblr's male CEO Jeff D'Onofrio belief that, "there are no shortage of sites on the internet that feature adult content" is just as privileged as he is.

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If you've logged into your middle school Tumblr recently, you'd notice that Tumblr is still the same place you remember. Perhaps stuck in a bit of a time warp, it's still full of fanfiction, fan pages, basic white girl stuff, and porn. A lot of porn.

Tumblr announced Monday, December 3 that all adult content AKA pornography will no longer be allowed on the site.

Excuse me. What?

First, Tumblr have you forgotten that porn and thinspiration blogs are what made you famous? Tumblr has always been the "legit" version of the dark dim part of the internet.

Jeff D'Onofrio, Tumblr's white, male CEO said this in the announcement blog post:

"Bottom line: There are no shortage of sites on the internet that feature adult content. We will leave it to them and focus our efforts on creating the most welcoming environment possible for our community."

Jeff—I'm here to tell you that you are incorrect.

As a woman, I never felt like it was acceptable to view porn. PornHub and sites like it were not an option.

It was Tumblr that introduced me and many of my friends to "tasteful," soft pornography. For myself and many other women I know, they still felt safe viewing porn on Tumblr.

Tumblr does not fill the same niche as PornHub.

Adult content on Tumblr is as wide-reaching as the mind. D'Onofrio said himself, "Tumblr has always been a place for wide open, creative self-expression at the heart of community and culture."

I hate to break it to you, but adult content is culture.

Tumblr was a place where folks could find their sexual identity. Stumble into kinks and fetishes that they never knew existed.

Tumblr is shamming every woman that found their sexuality on the platform.

By banning adult content, Tumblr is saying, "Hey Women! The content that you found sexually freeing is wrong, it doesn't belong here, and you should go find it somewhere else. We don't care if we're taking away your community."

Sex workers are concerned about the impact on their lives as well.

To be clear, Tumblr should do its best to limit illegal and underage pornography. But, let's not throw out the champagne with the cork.

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Pelvic Floor Dysfunction Is More Common Than You Think And It's The Reason Sex Can Be So Painful

Pelvic Floor what?

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Losing your virginity comes with a flood of different emotions like excitement, fear, happiness, oh, and pain. Wow did you not expect the pain, but you heard it's supposed to hurt a lot less the second time, and every other time after.

Only, for you, it's painful every single time, you tense up and don't know why. Your partner tells you just to relax, but it's not that easy, and it feels like it's something you can't control. Why does this happen? I might just have an answer for it, and a way to make it better.

Pelvic Floor Dysfunction. Pelvic what now?

Pelvic Floor Dysfunction, according to a blog written by the Florida Hospital, "refers to a wide range of disorders that occur when muscles of the pelvic floor are weak, tight or torn." Ouch. The pelvic floor muscles keep your organs in place, and when they are weakened, you can develop PFD. The range of symptoms can go from the strong frequent urge to urinate, painful periods and difficulty with going a number two. The symptom I found most surprising was painful intercourse.

This isn't something my gyno ever talked to me about or even my regular doctor. I literally just found out this existed, and it makes a lot of sense in terms of the issues a lot of women, in particular, have with their sex lives.

Definitely do not pull a me and self-diagnose, talk to your gyno. I have researched a good chunk of ways that this issue can be fixed, or at least made more bearable. We deserve a sex life that doesn't involve pain to the extent we experience it, it's time to be liberated ladies!

Try doing yoga. Three out of four women surveyed said their sex lives improved in all aspects due to doing yoga. Yoga relaxes you, which is where the benefits of a better sex life come from. You can try yoga in a class, or even watch a video on Youtube and teach yourself.

Kegel exercises are another thing to try. Kegel is when you contract and relax the muscles of your pelvic floor, where your uterus and bladder are held in place. The goal is to give your muscles a toned effect, and this can result in reducing pain (yay) during sex, being aware of yourself climaxing/ having a better orgasm (HELLO) and helping with urinary incontinence too. The basics are pretending you're holding your pee when you really have to go. Do this for two to three seconds on an empty bladder and then release. Once you get the hang of it, do about five sets of ten reps a day, and await the improvements.

There is also pelvic floor physical therapy you can try. The International Society for Sexual Medicine says you are "taught how to contract and relax pelvic floor muscles in relation to other muscles and breathing and timing techniques to make the exercises more effective. These exercises can stretch tight muscles, strengthen weak ones, and improve flexibility." Other forms of therapy include self-education, manual therapy, pelvic floor biofeedback, electronic simulation, and vaginal dilators. I know some of those terms sound like a foreign language, so I'm linking the website for you all to check out.

In terms of sex positions, it's honestly up to you and how you feel. Experiment with what feels good and what doesn't feel so good. If you have a solid man in your life, he'll do whatever he can to make sure you feel the best you can. Use a pillow under your pelvis and have him hit it from behind, because sis, it makes the world of a difference compared to the lovely standard missionary. That's something I've heard helps. Cosmopolitan has done a fabulous job of listing five positions you should try if sex hurts, and I hope they work and feel as great as they look.

To all my ladies who experience painful sex on the regular, I feel you, and we deserve better. Talk to your gyno about what you're experiencing, and don't let any guy tell you to "relax and stop tensing up." Have some great sex!

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