How College Kids Are Keeping Romance Alive In The Face Of Hookup Culture In 2019

How College Kids Are Keeping Romance Alive In The Face Of Hookup Culture In 2019

I asked 20 people what romance was to them and here are their answers.

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In this day and age, romance seems like a foreign concept to many of us. What is exactly romance now? Do we still have that idyllic picture in our heads of milkshakes and burgers at the local diner or the movie drive-in date? Or has romance somehow evolved into something more? Is it just about dating now or is it more about the person you're choosing to date? I asked 20 people what romance was to them and here are their answers.

1. "A best friend."

2. "Someone knowing what you like and doing stuff just because they care for you."

3. "A fling with a frat boy."

4. "Doing something thoughtful for someone or when your significant other does something for you that is customized or personal to you for what you like or are interested in."

5. "Truly feeling loved and being comfortable with your significant other."

6. "Farting in front of each other."

7. "Understanding your love language and acting on it."

8. "When they give you the last of their fries. Or when they know your Chipotle order by heart and bring it to you."

9. "When my boyfriend started squeezing my hand three times after I showed him "New Year's Day" by Taylor Swift...

Basically, it means he's here for the long road."

10. "Romance can't be forced. It's something that doesn't necessarily happen when you're in love, but at least when you're well on the way...

For me, it's the culmination of wanting to make the person I'm with truly feel as special as I possibly can. Stripping away all the arguments, the bickering, and insecurities between us and getting lost in that other person."

11. "Hmm well, I think it is different for everyone. But to me, it is being made to feel special. I want to go out on a date. It doesn't have to be fancy, but something that lets you have quality time and focus on each other...

I want to know that I'm important for me to be in their life. I really like the little things, so when I was dating my ex, I always wished that just once he would make me dinner for when I got home from work or would help me with something without making me feel guilty for asking for the help. Bringing home flowers or something small just show to that I was thought about."

12. "On the surface, I think of romantic acts and things. Jane Austin novels, a cabin in the woods with a cozy fire, chocolate of course!

But as I think more about it, I think romance is that giddy feeling you get when you're so excited to talk to someone or to interact with them."

13. "To me, romance means being physically, emotionally and mentally connected with someone."

14. "I think being able to connect both mentally and physically. You can't just have one and expect something that lasts. 

Romance is sitting on your couch with someone, talking about anything and everything and realizing how much you love to hear what they say, how they say it and also understand it. You don't need the dark lit restaurant and the perfect slow music, you need the connection with someone-no matter the location."

15. "Romance is being able to have fun with another person without having to worry or concern over anything else...

For example, I always talk about how much I love my 'island husband' because when we go on trips, he and I forget work and everything we would normally be stressed about and we are able to truly have fun with each other."

16. "Romance to me is when another person shows through efforts that you are the most important person in their life in that moment. They make you feel feel special, secure and honestly, high on life...

If I'm thinking about the relationship with my future husband, I would include that they would be my best friend and that there is a connection on a deeper level than any other. Our souls were meant to meet."

17. "Romance to me is putting the other person first, and being selfless. Their happiness is your happiness."

18. "I think there are many forms of romance, but I am the most in love with my boyfriend when he loves me despite all my flaws. When he makes me feel important when I don't even feel deserving of it...

I think that love is putting effort to be together and make special moments in the time you get to see each other."

19. "Hmmm, this makes me think. I'd say romance to me is remembering the little things and always being able to have fun and laugh with your person!"

20. "Romance is doing things to make your significant other extremely happy just because you want to see them smile like a goon."

Everyone is different in their opinions of what romance is to them. We each desire different things, but overall we all desire to be with the person that makes us happiest of all. We each have our own individual ways of saying "I love you" and that is the greatest part of love.

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

10 Things My Significant Other MUST Do In Order To Earn The Privilege Of Meeting My Mom

I say "Hakuna Matata" on the daily, but you really need to say it when you prepare to meet my mom.

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Besides getting married, meeting the parents can be the most stressful time in any relationship. Your boyfriend could be freaking out because he doesn't want to sound like a loon in front of your dad or your mom may be chopping the vegetables a little too loudly making your girlfriend seem uncomfortable in the presence of a knife. Stressing for days (maybe even weeks) up until the day arrives is apart of being in love because you want your parents to love your significant other just as much as you do and when the dinner is finally over, you can breathe again. My family is a little different and my boyfriend has to do these things to be able to meet my mom and my brother (may as well add my cousins into the mix, too because they're my older siblings).

1. Pass the "Best Friends Test"

I have 6 best friends and each one of them has a unique personality. There's the momma friend, the crazy friend, the questionable friend, the laid back friend, the turnt friend, and the friend who just wants me to be happy. If they don't like you, I'll talk to them to figure out why they don't like you. Either way, if you hurt me, they'll hurt you.

2. Prove that stability is your main priority five years from now, even if I'm not in your plan

Things happen and we can't predict everything. We can be together now, break up in a year, and then get back together. It's part of being a teenager/young adult. We deal with a lot, I mean, we're in college, but the older we get, the more stressful life gets, so I want you to show me that you can handle whatever stresses come your way. I want you to be stable on your own before adding a girlfriend into the mix.

3. Deal with my "Hunger Fits"

Let's face it, I can be a brat, but I'm only a brat on three occasions.

1. I'm sleepy.

2. You didn't let me get my way.

3. I'm hungry.

If you eat without me or go get food without me, I might cry and pout like a two-year-old, so you have to be able to handle it. Pro-tip, have snacks with you whenever we go somewhere.

4. Be okay with getting roasted

My cousins are the funniest people you'll ever meet, but they aren't afraid to talk about you while you sit in front of them, so I need to know that you're okay with being roasted. They're not doing it to be mean (trust me, they aren't), but they're doing it because they're my family and they care about me as if I were their little sister.

5. Be able to hold an intelligent conversation for more than 5 minutes

Good conversation is an essential part of a relationship and I love talking about things that are happening in the world today and because my mom is super knowledgeable on a lot of things, you have to be able to talk for more than 5 minutes about something that's engaging.

6. Remain calm in the face of a difficult conversation

I know when it came to certain topics, I used to go off like a volcano, but I've had to grow out of exploding on people just because they don't agree with me. It takes months, maybe even years to master that type of patience and self-restraint, but I grew up fast, so I needed to learn in less than a year how to hold my tongue. I need to know that if you and I (or someone in my family) were to be in a serious conversation, you'd remain calm. I won't blow up on you, so please don't blow up on me (or my family) because then it might not end so well.

7. State your opinion, no matter how mad I might get

Following up with number six, this is a must! I'm a writer, so I deal with a lot of written opinions on the daily. I'm also involved in a lot of organizations where open dialogue is encouraged, so I deal with a lot of verbal opinions, too. People are going to say what they want to say no matter what and I want you to be able to tell me what's on your mind no matter how severe it may be. I'm here for you and I want you to know that you can trust me with your opinions. I might not agree with them, but I can deal with them.

8. Be able to sit and talk about sports and video games with my brother

You'll for sure meet my older brother before you meet my mom only because he acts just like my late grandfather; calm and laid back. He goes with the flow and doesn't get upset unless I get upset, so you don't have to worry about the big bad overprotective brother (but he is very big and very overprotective). He'd much rather sit and talk about "fork-knife" or a basketball game than grill you. It's just how he is. Also, don't be offended if he engages in conversation with you for like ten minutes before he loses interest in talking to you and goes back to playing his game.

9. Be okay and open to the possibility of a long distance relationship

I don't plan on staying down South for long. I actually won't stay here after I graduate from college. Long distance relationships don't work for 40% of all couples, but I want us to not be a statistic. I believe that we could make it, so I would need to know that you'd be okay with me being a thousand miles away; and of course, if you were halfway across the country, I would learn to be okay with it, too.

10. Love your family as much as you love me

Family is a big deal for me. It's always been me, my older brother, and my mom. You may come from a household where it's you and both of your parents, you and one parent, or you, your parent(s), and your siblings. I love my mom and brother with all of my heart and would drop anything (and I have dropped things) to be with them. I want to see that you love your family with the same amount of love that you give me. A man who loves the family he is born into will love the family he marries into.

My family's triangle has never been broken before, so this is new territory for all of us. Don't feel like an outsider, though! These may seem extensive and extra, but it's the things that matter to me. Aside from the apparent trustworthiness, loyalty, wanting three pets, having a sense of humor, and education that I look for in a guy, you have to do these ten things to meet my mom.

If you pass all of these, then you get to meet her. Don't stress about it though because if she doesn't like you at the first meeting, she'll come around by the next because she loves me and she'll see that I love you.

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To The Parents Who Raised The Man Of My Dreams, It Paid Off

You did a phenomenal job.

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As a parent, you always wonder if you're doing it right. Parenting doesn't come with instructions. You're not told how to punish your children in every situation or what to do whenever they accomplish something. You're not completely prepared for it. However, for someone without instructions, you did a phenomenal job.

You raised the man of my dreams.

I've dated throughout my teens and every guy seemed to be the same, but with your son everything was different. Your son is everything I've ever wanted. He is perfect. He is such a gentleman. I want you to know everything you taught him like holding the door and paying for dates, it worked.

I want you to know he doesn't show anger towards me. I'm sure I aggravate him and make him angry, but I want you to know I'll never know when I've done so because he doesn't show it. He gets mad with football games and after he gets done yelling, he apologizes.

He makes me feel beautiful. He has seen me at my absolute worse. He has seen me right when I wake up in the morning with no makeup and my hair is a mess and he tells me I'm beautiful. Whenever so get dressed up, he notices. He makes sure to let me know I look beautiful. He pays attention to detail like that my hair is curled or I have a new nose ring in and he adds them in with the compliments.

He is always supportive. Whenever I started back to school, he was so proud of me. When I started writing for The Odyssey, he shared my articles. He will tell me how proud he is of me. When I make good grades on assignments, he tells me good job.

He is so loving. He comforts me whenever I'm sick. When I had the stomach bug, he got my medicine, trashcans, and played with my hair to comfort me. He brushes and straightens my hair for me whenever I don't feel like it because he wants it to look good.

Thanks to you I have found someone who treats me wonderful. If it wasn't for you, he wouldn't know how to treat a lady. It is because of you that he turned out to be nice and respectful man he is today. I want you to know you did an amazing job raising him. He's everything I've ever wanted. Thank you for raising him to be such a gentleman. Thank you for raising him to be everything I've ever dreamed of.

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