I am a young mom. Before that, I was a young wife. Those are facts, and I will tell you that I don’t regret it one second. But, for some reason, when I tell fellow university students that I am married or have a daughter there’s a look that comes to their face. “Oh God, why me? Why did I have to start a conversation with this crazy person?”, their eyes practically scream as they scurry from contact and exit the conversation as soon as possible.
Well, I’m not crazy, and neither are those like me.
“But you’re so young…” is what I often get from my peers, and it drives me up the wall.
After smiling and nodding these people off, I’ve finally resolved to figure out why they feel this way. Why am I too young for marriage?
This is the answer I have gotten every single time:
“You’re so young! You have so much life to experience before settling down! Marriage is FOREVER.”
Here is my argument to that:
What is there for me to experience that I can’t with my partner by my side? Why is it so taboo that I make memories that will last a lifetime with someone that I can share them with?
What life is there to experience that I can’t with my husband? I moved across the country to marry the man that stole my heart. We’ve climbed mountains and dipped our feet in the ocean on both coasts. We’ve gone on adventures and lived spontaneously together. We’ve shared meals in tens of states, built a home together, and then moved on together.
What else is there that I need to do, to experience? The only experiences that I can conjure are ones that I do not want. Having a family sometimes means missing out on the best parties, not waking up naked in the backyard, and not starting every morning freshmen year with mimosas.
For some, the crazy college experience is right. Get wild, find yourself, do what you need. But for me, I have found myself, and I have found the right person to share my life with. Those things don’t appeal to me anymore.
So when people say that I should wait to get married because it is FOREVER, I know.
When you find the right person, you know. There’s not an experience in my life that I wouldn’t want to share with my husband. It makes me infinitely happy that I get those extra years growing and living life together and that it is forever.
Of course, marriage isn’t a joke. It’s not something to be taken lightly and you definitely shouldn’t jump in before you know you’re ready. But if you think that by getting married you are going to be missing out on life experiences, fret not.
I am happy in my choice to marry young.
While you’re nursing a hangover, I’ll be nursing my daughter, with my husband snoozing in our shared bed. And, honestly, there’s nothing wrong with either of our lives. Everyone is different and everyone has unique ways of growing and learning. But maybe next time you cringe at the young and ‘settled’, you'll reconsider.
Are we crazy? Maybe a little.
Are we different? Yes, a bit.
But, are we happy? Yes, yes we are.
Originally found on my personal blog at http://www.gonechasingthesun.com/