6 Things To Keep In Mind When Thinking About Rebounds

6 Things To Keep In Mind When Thinking About Rebounds

"Broken people lead to broken hearts. That's why it's so important to heal from one relationship before you start another."
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What comes to mind when you hear the word rebound?

Heartbreak, one night stand, fake love, lead on…. and many more.

Rebounds aren’t always a bad thing. Sometimes they turn into the most beautiful thing, and other times they help us and grow us into a better person.

In life, we will all have a rebound at least once in our lives, and we will be someone’s rebound. It isn’t always the best feeling, but sometimes it’s the best thing to happen to us. This could open our eyes up to what’s important to us. No matter what the outcome, what matters is how you handle it.

Here are a few different things to think about when thinking about rebounds:

1. “I think I’m over them.”

Sometimes in life, we break-up with someone and think we’re over them. The relationship might have been so bad for so long that we were emotionally out of it before it was officially over. Maybe the person you broke up with was so crazy he/she made it easy to move on. Maybe it was just a mutual agreement to move on because you both are in two different places in your life. Whatever the situation deep down you still really care about this person. You begin to miss how that person used to make you feel, how they use to treat you, how they use to be there for you. You miss having someone that you could call your own and someone that you could tell everything to and who was your “ride or die”. This whole process is when you begin to catch a rebound.

2. “I didn’t do it on purpose.”

Rebounds aren’t picked on purpose. Rebound is found because you miss that special person’s presence. You meet someone new and think they are lovely and they begin to make you feel just as good or better than our ex. This makes our broken heart want for them. So, we begin to “fall” for them. We begin to let ourselves fall back into something. Our heart is craving that loving feeling we are so used to the feeling.

3. “ I need to find myself.”

After a relationship, you need some time for yourself. This time is a time when you begin to get over this person. Even if you think you are over someone right away, take some time. Take some time because sometimes in life you won’t know how much you miss someone until you see them or see something about them. This is when the suppressed feelings begin to come up, and then you start to hurt again. This hurt is okay, it’s part of the healing process, but the last thing you want to do is hurt someone else because you hurt.

4. “ I’m the rebound, I don’t know what to do.”

Being the rebound is something hard too. You have to help build this person back up. You have to make them feel wanted again, and put the puzzle pieces of a broken heart back together. When you begin to notice you’re the rebound, make sure to step back and become a best friend. Don’t try to get serious with this person. Try to help them find themselves again and learn what its like to love life for themselves. They say lovers of friends never, friends to lovers forever. If you like this person is their best friend will feel exactly right. Some time down the road you can become that significant other in their life. I know sometimes it’s hard to watch people hurt but sometimes that’s what needs to happen to feel better. Be the support in their life! Sometimes in hard times you just need that person to talk to, the person will feel more comfortable sharing things with you if you aren’t significantly involved because they won’t be worrying about ruining the relationship.

5. “ I need to fill this void.”

The key to healing after a break up isn’t finding someone new…. a rebound. All the rebound does is fill a void in your life. It doesn’t help you get over the person you loved. The rebound is just someone that can give you the physical and mental affection you are missing because you are single. This person isn’t someone you love. You love the idea of this person, and chances are when you’re on your rebound all you want is your ex. Think about the rebound’s feelings. I know you’re in a low place and need someone, but you need a best friend, not a lover.

6. “ Can’t believe I was just a rebound…”

The impact of being that rebound is devastating. The person works so hard to make you happy and puts their whole heart into the relation, just for you to be half-heartedly in the relationship. That’s not fair. When you are half-heartedly in a relationship, it makes the other person feel like trash, unwanted, used. When you make someone your rebound, you play with their feelings. You don’t want to make someone else hurt because you need to fill a void. Make sure to think about other’s feelings too.

Rebounding isn’t always precisely all of that, but you need to make sure before you get involved with someone new, you are ready and over that ex of yours. You don’t want to hurt someone else because you are hurting yourself. Rebounds aren't terrible, but they can hurt people.

"Never allow loneliness to drive you into the arms of someone you know you don't belong with."

Cover Image Credit: Kendall Gatewood

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

To The Woman Who Needs To Be Wanted, Don’t Let Men Be Your Vice

It will only make you begin to despise yourself.
Cai Parks
Cai Parks
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By definition, a vice is a habitual or trivial defect... a shortcoming. Everyone has a vice.

Mine was men.

I always felt abandoned by the men in my life. I always clung to the opinions and attention of the boys around me...fighting for it in any way I could.

When I was younger, it was easy to get the attention of the boys my age by just dressing cute and having a bubbly personality.

As I got older though, I noticed that I was having to work harder and harder for their attention. Eventually, it turned into me feeling like I had to give myself to them in any way they asked to get their attention.

So that’s what I did.

I used my body as a way to fill some kind of void that I thought could be filled with the love of a man.

As the years went on, I felt myself clinging to not their love, but their lust.

I no longer cared about their love.

I just wanted to hear them call me hot, sexy, or beautiful. I knew they were using me.

I didn’t care.

I needed them to want me.

I needed them to beg.

I needed to feel needed.

For any woman who might feel as though a man’s lust for you can fill that deep void in your heart, take a step back. Trivial, temporary things like that will only make your heart heavier.

It will only make you begin to despise yourself.

There’s nothing wrong with living life the way you want or with who you want, but don’t use that lifestyle simply as a way to make you feel wanted.

Because my Prince Charming came into my life and I no longer needed any other man.

I finally felt truly loved and he helped me to learn that even without him, I would be more than a body.

He helped me see that I was a body, face, brain, smile, laugh, personality, and everything in between.

I am a strong woman now that I know my worth.

You are a strong woman.

Show your strength.

Know your worth.

Cover Image Credit: @thersagrant/Instagram
Cai Parks
Cai Parks

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Everything You Should Know Before Dating A Fitness Instructor

Sex, weights, cheat meal dates.

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views

As a fitness trainer, I know how much we love our job. How much we love the people we help and encourage. How much we never want to stop doing what we do. Yet, it's not all sunshine and rainbows. My boyfriend has to put up with some things that probably, kinda sorta are unconventional. But, he's living his dream (his words).

No matter what they teach, personal training, yoga, pilates, barre, HIIT, I could go on and on, but either way, they are passionate about the people they work with. This fire follows them throughout their life and will most definitely influence you.

1. Constant practicing

Don't be alarmed if you wake up to find her up and about practicing her routines for a class/client.

2. Gushing about a client who has been killing it 

No matter how much of a tough cookie we are, clients touch our hearts.

3. She's flexible

You. Are. Welcome. My best friends always introduce me to guys with, "She's really flexible ;)"

4. There's a routine, stick to it

We may be flexible, but don't come between her and her schedule. She is supported by her routine.

5. You are now a fitness class guinea pig

She needs you to help her rehearse. Approach her practice tests with enthusiasm and just have fun.

6. She'll never judge you

Don't ever feel pressured or intimidated. We love you for you. And, news flash, we are not perfect.

7. Always learning

Learning never ends. Learning new routines, learning new people, learning new emotions, learning new approaches to life.

8. And always eating

Teaching a few classes a day is tough on the body. We need our snacks. All. The. Time.

9. Stretches before bed... every night

No matter how tiring and long the day was, she will make sure to fit it a quick bend and no break.

10. The funny things that happened during class

Story time: One time I taught and my pants ripped. Only made the class more fun!

11. Shaker bottle vases

There's no need for vases, when shaker bottles do you justice. The first time my boyfriend brought home roses, I didn't have a vase so we improvised and used a shaker bottle. Now, that's the only vase we will ever need.

12. Free personal training

It's your dream come true. Fitness is at your right hand at all times. Plus, we will be pumped to start talking to you about our passion.

13. She talks endlessly about how well/not well your class went

Sometimes we kill it and sometimes... we fall a little short.

14.  Chugging water

We need to stay hydrated! Plus, she'll be your water tracker as she bugs you to drink with her. Shots! Shots! Shots (of water)!

15. Team work makes the dream work

There is no "I" in team and fitness instructors know the strength of collaboration and support. No one can go through journey a journey alone.

16. She wakes you up early to go on a run

Let's take a jog to the beach and watch the sunrise!

17. Protein, protein, and more protein

She doesn't have to be a weight lifter to assure that she nourishes her body with enough protein (from any source you prefer). My cupboard is always stocked with lentils and chickpeas.

18. Watching her watch fitness videos to get ideas

While you're reading the news, scrolling through Instagram, or just chilling out, she'll be watching workout videos or saving posts from fitness accounts.

19. Goes to bed super early

We need at least eight hours of beauty sleep and, let's be real, we are grandpas.

20.  She lives off of Spotify playlists

Wait, do you hear that song? What's it called, I need to add it to my workout playlist. Plus, she loves to sing (even if she isn't that good).

21.  Pulse 2, 3, 4

While she does chores, she'll start reciting her catchphrases and mantras.

22.  She's your forever cheerleader

Getting out of bed? If you don't squeeze it, no one else will! Washing the dishes? Let's go, you've got this! Running to the bathroom? One more minute! 30 more seconds! Mowing the lawn? You better feel it tomorrow!

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