Advice For The Single Ladies From A Lady In A Relationship

Advice For The Single Ladies From A Lady In A Relationship

Because hey, I know how these things work. I got the guy, right?
2689
views

What's up beautiful? How are ya? Single AF?

I feel that we've all been there—many, many times. The jerks take over some months and end up throwing you out—for no good freaking reason.

Listen up, men ain't shit—seriously. I know I sound like a huge hypocrite considering I'm in a relationship- but seriously, most men aren't shit.

Here's some advice I have for you, and I hope you take it. Because, well, I know something about guys, I am in a relationship. I'm here to tell you how to make it work to the best of your ability,

and hey, if you've been screwed over before—I'm here to make sure that never, EVER happens again.

Play hard to get

You've heard that before? It doesn't work? Well, chances are you're not playing hard enough. It's bullshit if you hear that guys don't like that because I've literally heard it out of my boyfriend's mouth.

No one likes the easy girl (I mean unless you are strictly involved in a NO STRINGS ATTACHED relationship, then by all means, go for it). But, seriously, act like he ain't shit (because he's not).

But, that's your first step to getting the guy.

Keep your options open.

You never know when he's going to strike with his male bullshit—so don't completely give everything to him yet. Keep in mind that we are still young, but if you can't see it working with that specific someone, then don't limit yourself to just him.

Unless you are in an exclusive relationship don't just flirt with one guy, try other things out too.

Don't get too attached to fast.

Again, in the hookup culture, we are involved in now you never know what you're getting yourself into right now. It sucks because there are some good ones out there, but most, just want one thing.

Unless you know that sex isn't a huge factor in creating feelings, don't do it.

Please, for the love of God, don't.

I'm begging you.

Know if you are the side hoe or the main hoe.

I'm not saying stalk him because you don't want to come off crazy, but know who you are dealing with. Is he a one girl guy? Or do you think that he's a multiple kinda guy?

Yes, ladies, there are guys out there like that.

See how he acts around girls—is he flirtatious? Do you think he could take home another girl every night? Does he give you most of his attention?

Find some little facts about him—like what has his other relationships been like? Has he been in one?

Just like a paper in school, do your research before fully committing to something.

Have fun.

You seriously don't know how lucky you are sometimes to not have to deal with another human. But, you could say the same thing back. Being single is all about having fun—enjoy the hookup culture. But, be sure to know what you want before you do anything.

Being single has its perks, take advantage before you are locked down (in a good way).

Being in a relationship is amazing too, absolutely amazing. But, it can only be that way if you're in one with the right person.

Don't sell yourself away too fast, make sure you're both on the same page.

Good Luck Love!

Cover Image Credit: Brooke Albright

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

I Am A Hopeless Romantic Living In A World Where One-Night Stands Are The Norm

It's the little things.

8703
views

In today's society, it can certainly start to feel like no one takes love seriously anymore.

Whether it's that one couple who has broken up and gotten back together more times than you can count, the two friends-with-benefits no one can figure out, your local womanizer, or just hookups in general, love and lust are a huge part of specifically college life and culture.

As a hopeless romantic, being part of a generation that "just wants to have fun" can be really frustrating, especially when you just want to find something real. It is so easy for people to put on a fake act just to get what they want and sometimes this can be extremely hard to see through. I'm sure we've all had some kind of incident with someone who played nice but had ulterior motives and the sad truth is that it can be impossible to recognize a person's artificiality.

I am a hopeless romantic.

I have always classified myself as such, and it has remained true. Sure, I can make the most of the freedoms I have as a single college woman, but deep down I just want to find my person.

I've had my fair share of letdowns, and I think we all have, but being a hopeless romantic makes it that much more difficult to get past the "what ifs" and fantasies that come along with starting something with someone new. We may already have our hearts set on a person when they decide they've gotten what they wanted and leave.

For me, I find myself caught up in the little things that someone does. I have always been someone who picks up on small details in situations, and sometimes this works against me.

I pick up on the small facial expressions that he may not even realize he is making; the ones that tell you when their guard has been let down, even just for a split second.

I pick up on the way he sits our two cellphones side by side on the nightstand, taking care to line them up perfectly as if that's just their spot.

I pick up on the short moments of laughter where he actually lets himself laugh and forgets about the act.

I pick up on things, and sometimes I end up hurting because of it.

When it comes down to it, though, I wouldn't change the way that I am. I wouldn't change the fact that I find myself in the search for more in a society that mostly only offers me less.

The trait that tends to hurt me most is also the one that I value most. Even if noticing all the little things is something that contributes to my own heartache, I love those moments. There is something beautiful about those tiny things shared by two people, even if the connection ends there.

Sure, it can be hard. But so can everything.

It's just a matter of finding the beauty.

OMG, check these out

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

Dedicate Your Summer To Bettering Yourself For Yourself, Not Your Ex

Why waste energy on an ex who doesn't care about you anymore?

1142
views

I'm single for the summer (yet again, no shock there) but this summer there's something in the air that just feels different. It's the feeling of true acceptance of my single status.

Last summer I was single when I really didn't want to be. My heart with still holding out for a guy who wasn't interested in anything more than my friendship. It took me from late March all the way until Halloween to get over those feelings. However, while working through those tough feelings that summer, I came to enjoy my time on my own and not talking to anyone except my best friends. I didn't have to worry about when I'd get a text back, or if I'd be left on read, or who he'd be out with since I wasn't around. The only thing I needed to worry about was my paychecks and tan lines.

Sometimes after breaking things off with someone who you put so much effort into, whether it was a boyfriend, an almost relationship, or even a friend with benefits, it's easy to want to show off on social media and make them regret ever hurting you or ending things. Why? It's a nice little ego boost, sure, but after those few seconds of glee from the fact that you know they've seen and maybe even liked your picture or your tweet, or saw your story on Snapchat, do you still feel happy? No, you go right back to feeling like crap, whether you want to admit it or not. Stop making yourself all about them when that ship has sailed and start being all about you.

Your ex is off doing their own thing, maybe thinking about you, but obviously not enough to want you back in their life the way you used to be. They are probably out there finding a new person to take your spot because they don't have you at their beck and call anymore. If they're also showing off to show you how much better they are without you or to make you jealous...why are you still following them or still participating in this sick little game for attention? Grow up and block them so you don't have to keep seeing their posts, or be adult enough to stop if you're doing the same as well. If it's only you posting, chances are you just look stupid, so stop before you really embarrass yourself. I was that person, and I know first hand how embarrassed I am for acting the way I did.

Summer is synonymous for doing whatever the hell you want. Wear what you want, say what you want, and be the best version of yourself that only a high dose of Vitamin D can bring out. Your ex is an ex for many reasons. You have to set aside the summer for you and what benefits you only. Don't concern yourself with an ex who doesn't care in the least about you anymore. Coming from someone who posted thirst traps aimed at a specific person along with countless shady AF stories on Snap and Insta in the hopes that this one person and their friends would see it, just stop and save yourself the energy as well as regret.

We're all adults, it's time to stop the petty posts and photos. Post your thirst trap for yourself because you're a sexy queen who doesn't need anyone but herself. Once you start focusing on yourself this summer, instead of your ex, you'll realize just have great it feels to truly be free.

OMG, check these out

Facebook Comments