'Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I'm Bored' Is Everything Right With Today’s Dating Scene

'Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I'm Bored' Is Everything Right With Today’s Dating Scene

If you're threatened by Ariana Grande's hit song, maybe you should reevaluate your relationship.

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Recently, a writer for the Odyssey published an article elaborating her disdain for Ariana Grande's song, "Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I'm Bored." The author of the article took her time to dissect why she believed that the song was "disgusting" and a menace to "today's dating scene." She even mentioned that a more fitting title for the song might be "Break Up with Your Boyfriend Because I'm a Whore." Real feminist of you, Megan Crabb.

There are so many conflicting factors at play here, so I wanted to float an alternate idea.

First of all, if your relationship with your boyfriend is threatened by a song, your relationship sucks. You shouldn't have to tell him to not get with other people, that should be a given. And if you're that insecure about him getting with other people, you shouldn't be in a relationship to begin with. Committing to growing with someone through a monogamous relationship is a voluntary choice, and not abiding by the expectations of your partner are grounds for being single — simple as that.

Second, can you blame Ariana Grande for wanting this guy to break up with his girlfriend so she can hook up with him? This guy's obviously a dime piece, and many people want a chance at him. At least she's asking that he break up with her instead of outright cheating on her. Don't you think it'd be much more disrespectful if she just took this girl's man without even waiting for them to be single? Frankly, she could probably just strut up to him and take him home, wordlessly, so maybe you should feel grateful she would respect you by at least asking him to break up with your sorry ass before she swooped in.

Crabb also mentioned that someone in a relationship is strictly "off-limits." There is no such thing as someone being "off-limits." The only person that can decide they are off-limits is that person, that individual gets to choose every day how "off-limits" they are. Other people that may be attracted to this individual get to try their hand at wooing them, and the individual can accept or decline. Oftentimes this is harmless: "Hey thanks, I'm flattered, but I'm in a relationship." If that individual continues to be approached by people that are cooler than the person they are in a relationship with, shouldn't they be allowed to opt out of their relationship? Most "relationships" these days are not real relationships, they act as placeholders because people don't want to be alone and they can't socially justify having more than one partner.

If my girl kept getting hit on by hot dudes, I'd be both flattered that: hey, my girl is hot and I should be aware that if I don't keep working on myself and constantly putting effort into this relationship, she will very easily leave me, as she should.

If Ariana Grande is asking you to break up with your man so she can hook up with him, you need to take a hard look at your life and realize you are winning, and getting insecure about her wanting to "hit it in the morning" is childish. If that's your man, and you think he's hot, don't you want to hit it in the morning too?

And lastly, ladies, let's stop with the slut-shaming. Ariana Grande is not a "whore" because she wants to have sex with a hot dude, and neither are you.

Maybe instead of resorting to name calling you could take a step back and realize that if you had as much social power as Ariana Grande, wouldn't you want the cream of the crop, too?

Literally, so hot RN

Literally, so hot RN

An Open Letter To The Girl In A Toxic Relationship Who Doesn't See The Signs To Let Go

"it took letting go to realize that I was holding onto nothing" -R.H Sin

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Dear you,

I hope you're doing well. I once thought I was too. I once thought that if he would just change, for me, everything would work. However, my sweet girl, you should not have to change people, you should not have to push people to be better, for you. You cannot help anyone, that does not want to help themselves.

In the movies, we learn to love a bad boy that needs changing. However, it isn't always your job to be boys saving grace. However, his shaming and emotional abuse is not just something you should put up with so that you can love him. That is not loving.

Love is not a constant competition of who could belittle the other one first. Love is not asking for a hug and being told no. Love does not make you feel stupid for bringing up things that hurt your feelings.

Love does not grow angry because you talk to your mom about your feelings. Love does not body shame. Love does not constantly change the passcode to their phone.

Love does not laugh when you find out they're unfaithful. Love does not tell you that you are not smart enough to accomplish anything. Love does not force their hand up your thigh when the words "no" slip out of your mouth.

Love is the warmth of a hand on your cheek when you get anxious. Love is getting your backpack out the car for you. Love is turning around when you need them. Love compromises.

Love is encouraging. Love is proud. Love is forgiving. Love sees you for who you are. Love knows you are worthy.

God is your Father and you are His daughter, so do not believe for one second that this abuse is the love you think you deserve.

Love will not always be easy. Love will be challenging and a constant prayer to not anger so quickly.

However, do not mix up challenging with the abuse. If you are losing the good pieces of yourself, then it isn't love. I know that you put a lot of time and effort into this relationship, but it is no good, you are holding on to someone whose heart is not in the right place to love you.

I connected with a poem from R. H. Sin, once I left my toxic relationship which reads, "it took letting go to realize that I was holding onto nothing."

Darling girl, you are so loved by so many people, do not let this relationship hold you back or make you feel less worthy than you are. I have always been the girl with her nose stuck up in the air smelling for smoke, to follow the trail to a burning house to find a boy that needed saving, but it is more than likely a boy that lit the fire in the first place and needs changing.

So, do not be me, be better. Be the girl that lights her own world on fire, for her work, for her family, for God. You are you and you are amazing, so do not fear being without him.

You will feel as if you have come up for air after drowning in an ocean that you had no idea you were swimming in.

The emotional abuse that this boy has put you through and maybe even physical abuse will leave you building walls around your heart. It will make other relationships hard, but you are so so strong.

You will meet someone that makes you so happy and feel so easy to love, you will never understand how you stuck around with the one that hurt you for so long.

You deserve to grow from this, and I promise you will.

Let go.

xoxo,

The girl who learned from a toxic relationship

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Being Far Away From My Boyfriend Actually Strengthened Our Relationship Instead Of Forcing It Apart

While we were apart, we became closer.

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Before I really start this article, I just want to say that my relationship isn't truly a long distance relationship. We are both college students at the same university eight months out of the year, but the other four months we live quite a distance apart. Even during those four months, we are only about 150 miles from each other as the bird flies, but really about three hours from each other.

Being in a relationship where I'm not able to see my boyfriend every day or even every week has been a real challenge. But it's been a good challenge. It hasn't been a challenge because I've felt unfaithful or fallen out of love with him in any way. It's challenging because I miss him. We both work jobs and our schedules aren't the same and oftentimes we aren't able to talk to each other unless it's early in the morning or late at night. There are times when all I want to do is talk to him and tell him about how my day went and get a big bear hug from him. Unfortunately, I'm not really able to do this.

I firmly believe that being apart from each other for days, weeks, or even months have brought us closer than we could've ever imagined. We knew that this would be difficult, and we knew that there would be bad days, but we decided to power through it. It has made each time that we are able to see each other so much more special and meaningful.

Seeing each other has become more of spending time with each other than just laying around on the couch playing around on our phones. It's become really getting to know each other better and catching up on all the things we had missed. It's become a time for us to simply be in each other's presence and enjoy being able to talk face to face without a phone in the middle of us. We go on more adventurous dates, we take more pictures, and I think we would both easily say that we fall more and more in love with each other after each opportunity we have to spend time together.

Spending time together is no longer a daily activity, but it has become a right to be earned through hard work and several paychecks as travel can become expensive. We no longer take opportunities to see each other for granted, and it has made us grow closer because we aren't able to spend time together often. We look forward to the days when we won't have to worry about being apart but know that this is only a stepping stone in our relationship.

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