Researchers estimate that 40-50% of first marriages end in divorce. This means that many people have faced their parents' marriage end. While reasons for divorce range from a loss of intimacy to financial reasons, divorce is the option many individuals choose. It's a common belief that children of divorce enter their romantic relationships much differently than an individual whose parents are still married.
With mixed beliefs on this subject and a lot of curiosity, I decided to put this to the test. I asked fifteen millennials how their parents' divorce affected their own dating life, and this is what they had to say.
1. It made me realize how NOT to act.
"It made me realize what not to do in a relationship. My dad was an abusive pile of shit to my mom so I know how not to act towards women and how to treat them better." - Male, 20
2. It doesn't affect me - in fact, I'm glad it happened.
"It was better when they got a divorce. My dad found someone who he was happy with." - Female, 23
3. Love doesn't last forever.
"It taught me that nothing lasts forever. Especially love. Who wants to give someone the keys to destroy their life like that? Not me." - Female, 20
4. Dating life? What's that?!
"Honestly, I don't have much of a dating life. I tend to have a hard time getting close to people I care about because I'm scared to lose them, but I'm also not really into hookup culture. It doesn't help that my parents are even more critical of my friends and love interests post-divorce." - Female, 20
5. Society isn't going to tell me I need a relationship.
"My parents aren't divorced but they might as well be because they don't talk much, they typically avoid each other and they've told me multiple times that the only reason they're married is because it's convenient for their financial situation. Being married doesn't always mean you act married. Because of this, I have no dating life. I avoid relationships at all costs because my parents' crappy marriage has made me fear being in a relationship because I don't want to be as unhappy as they are. I never grew up around that "idealized marriage" so it's hard to believe in a happily ever after when every married couple I've ever seen seems miserable. I'm happy on my own. Why would I risk ruining that just to conform to society?" - Female, 21
6. Um, honestly...
"Not at all." - Female, 20
7. I've never pictured walking down the aisle.
"I was always much more tentative than my friends to get into a relationship. I never grew up envisioning a wedding or marriage in my future like other kids do, but I am not opposed to it. I just know I haven't and won't jump into anything quickly." - Female, 23
8. I'm not repeating my mom's mistakes.
"I look for something totally different from what my dad was." - Female, 21
9. Being kinda into a relationship isn't a thing for me.
"I'm either completely into it or idgaf about it. There's no grey area." - Female, 37
10. Is it supposed to affect my dating life?
"I hardly think about it when I'm dating someone." - Male, 23
11. The last thing I want is my kids to think of my marriage is terrible.
"It made me want to marry someone because I truly love them. I don't want my kids to look at me and my husband the way I looked at my parents awful relationship." - Female, 20
12. I can't even begin to tell you how much it has.
"SO MUCH." - Female, 21
13. Do any relationships last?
"My parents divorce has made it difficult for me to feel like my relationships will work out. Even with such a healthy and happy relationship I fear that it will end up like theirs. Divorce is not an option for me." - Female, 21
14. Sorry, but...
"It makes it difficult to not only trust, but to trust men." - Female, 21
15. Will I ever be enough for someone?
"It is much harder to believe that love it actually out there, or that someone with love you for the rest of your life. The hardest part is the fear of not being enough, I think, because my parents weren't enough for each other." - Female, 19
16. Welp...
"I gotta find my OWN daddy now, ya feel me?" - Female, 21
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